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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 410577" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>If it's rebound, it hits worst at home in safe territory, after school is out and medications are wearing off. With a lot of effort these kids can hold it together for a short while, especially in a 1:1 situation. That's why I suggest you keep your own good notes. It might also help to have daily communication between yourself and school. We kept a travelling journal with difficult child 3 which we called our Communication Book. Teachers would write in it, sometimes something seemingly almost irrelevant, but these could be clues which tip us off to a problem he displays later in the afternoon. Then there were the times when the school deliberately withheld information. They had a policy of not notifying us of detention, for example, until after the week's detention was served. I really fought that one hard when I found out, because I remember one classic week - difficult child 3's behaviour at home was worse and worse through the week and I could do nothing with him. I was writing in the book, "Is there any change this week? Something happening at school that could be causing him to be more stressed?" and the teacher said, "No, no change here." Then the next week I got the note, "Your son served detention last week for the following reasons..."</p><p></p><p>I remember one meeting I had with the teacher, I'd arranged for a therapist to sit in on the class and we had a meeting together afterwards - me, the teacher, the therapist. Again it was a bad week for us at home and I asked if there was anything happening at school that could be a the cause. Then I noticed the staffroom noticeboard - difficult child 3's name was on the board for some infraction. We had just asked the teacher a direct question, "Has there been a problem? Have there been any incidents?" and been told no. The noticeboard told a different story. I asked the teacher and he played it down. But it was the first step to another detention, and I had only the previous week insisted that ANY infraction needed to be punished immediately (not wait until he built up enough black marks over six months) and I was to be notified immediately.</p><p></p><p>So never discount problems at school that you may not be getting told about. Also, teachers often won't bother parents about every little thing, or even a lot of big things, because if they do that with every kid, it's too much work. But once your child is identified as having problems and needing support, you can make a case for them telling you about YOUR child's activity at school.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 410577, member: 1991"] If it's rebound, it hits worst at home in safe territory, after school is out and medications are wearing off. With a lot of effort these kids can hold it together for a short while, especially in a 1:1 situation. That's why I suggest you keep your own good notes. It might also help to have daily communication between yourself and school. We kept a travelling journal with difficult child 3 which we called our Communication Book. Teachers would write in it, sometimes something seemingly almost irrelevant, but these could be clues which tip us off to a problem he displays later in the afternoon. Then there were the times when the school deliberately withheld information. They had a policy of not notifying us of detention, for example, until after the week's detention was served. I really fought that one hard when I found out, because I remember one classic week - difficult child 3's behaviour at home was worse and worse through the week and I could do nothing with him. I was writing in the book, "Is there any change this week? Something happening at school that could be causing him to be more stressed?" and the teacher said, "No, no change here." Then the next week I got the note, "Your son served detention last week for the following reasons..." I remember one meeting I had with the teacher, I'd arranged for a therapist to sit in on the class and we had a meeting together afterwards - me, the teacher, the therapist. Again it was a bad week for us at home and I asked if there was anything happening at school that could be a the cause. Then I noticed the staffroom noticeboard - difficult child 3's name was on the board for some infraction. We had just asked the teacher a direct question, "Has there been a problem? Have there been any incidents?" and been told no. The noticeboard told a different story. I asked the teacher and he played it down. But it was the first step to another detention, and I had only the previous week insisted that ANY infraction needed to be punished immediately (not wait until he built up enough black marks over six months) and I was to be notified immediately. So never discount problems at school that you may not be getting told about. Also, teachers often won't bother parents about every little thing, or even a lot of big things, because if they do that with every kid, it's too much work. But once your child is identified as having problems and needing support, you can make a case for them telling you about YOUR child's activity at school. Marg [/QUOTE]
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