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<blockquote data-quote="dreamer" data-source="post: 143764" data-attributes="member: 1697"><p>a sad reality is that it is not uncommon that a treatment for something can cause death. SOmetimes well before the illness itself. I knew before starting the pred, the risk involved, the possible consequences. We must always balance the pros and cons and we must each for ourself decide what risks we are willing to accept. My husband has long ago decided he did not accept the risks of treatment for his cancers etc....and he flat out refused treatment, becuz he did not like what he saw happen to others. I made sure he understood the ramifications of his choice, and once I knew he undesstood, I acepted his decision. I made it clear to my family from the start, the pred could in the future create some doozies of difficulties. BUT at the time I began the pred, I had no quality of life at all. I lived on edge of suicide daily, due to extreme unbelievable pain that morphine did not even take the edge off. Days went by hwere my kids lived hearing primal screams over which I had no conscious control. I was at the mercy of my ill husband and my children to meet my needs, oh yes, I wanted to go to a nurseing home, a facility, BUT ---that was not an option, no funding......etc etc. and my children were young and my daughter was in the depths of her own major difficulties and my son was SO little, and my family often could not even bear to see me, so they stayed as far away from me as they could sometimes. </p><p>SO while the prednisone is killing me......my illness had already done so and these 2 years I have had since? They are truly an amazing and incredible gift. That pred kicked butt of my illness and kept my symptoms at bay, and did a great job. BUT had my symptom pre pred not been as intense as they were? I do not knowww if I would have accepted the risks. ANd I cannot go back now and try to 2nd guess. How far I have brought my children in this last 2 years has been unbelievable. My son can now read and write. My difficult child is now starting her 3rd week of a <gasp> JOB! 2 years ago I never would have dreamed any of this could be possible at all. But, now it is payback time for me for this gift. </p><p></p><p>I used to be angry my previous docs did not Rx pred for me years ago, when I was first so ill so that I would not have gotten as ill as I became. These days Ino w have settled in to the idea that it just was not how it was supposed to be. I have now seen that me and my kids have learned some amazing things by how it all did play out. I would not wish those lessons on anyone, but, in hard truth, those lessons have already served my children well when they sit beside a friend of theirs who has an ill parent etc. </p><p>Will the side effects and results of pred actually finish the job and kill me? Or will I get hit by a car? I do not know. I try not to worry about it. I try to stay too busy enjoying each day. I almost did not have these days to enjoy them. My illness and the results of it have dramatically altered how I view my difficult children symptoms, my dhs symptoms and my sons issues. I see everything differently than I used to. </p><p>For all practical purposes I was dead before the pred. Anything I can do now is a blessing.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dreamer, post: 143764, member: 1697"] a sad reality is that it is not uncommon that a treatment for something can cause death. SOmetimes well before the illness itself. I knew before starting the pred, the risk involved, the possible consequences. We must always balance the pros and cons and we must each for ourself decide what risks we are willing to accept. My husband has long ago decided he did not accept the risks of treatment for his cancers etc....and he flat out refused treatment, becuz he did not like what he saw happen to others. I made sure he understood the ramifications of his choice, and once I knew he undesstood, I acepted his decision. I made it clear to my family from the start, the pred could in the future create some doozies of difficulties. BUT at the time I began the pred, I had no quality of life at all. I lived on edge of suicide daily, due to extreme unbelievable pain that morphine did not even take the edge off. Days went by hwere my kids lived hearing primal screams over which I had no conscious control. I was at the mercy of my ill husband and my children to meet my needs, oh yes, I wanted to go to a nurseing home, a facility, BUT ---that was not an option, no funding......etc etc. and my children were young and my daughter was in the depths of her own major difficulties and my son was SO little, and my family often could not even bear to see me, so they stayed as far away from me as they could sometimes. SO while the prednisone is killing me......my illness had already done so and these 2 years I have had since? They are truly an amazing and incredible gift. That pred kicked butt of my illness and kept my symptoms at bay, and did a great job. BUT had my symptom pre pred not been as intense as they were? I do not knowww if I would have accepted the risks. ANd I cannot go back now and try to 2nd guess. How far I have brought my children in this last 2 years has been unbelievable. My son can now read and write. My difficult child is now starting her 3rd week of a <gasp> JOB! 2 years ago I never would have dreamed any of this could be possible at all. But, now it is payback time for me for this gift. I used to be angry my previous docs did not Rx pred for me years ago, when I was first so ill so that I would not have gotten as ill as I became. These days Ino w have settled in to the idea that it just was not how it was supposed to be. I have now seen that me and my kids have learned some amazing things by how it all did play out. I would not wish those lessons on anyone, but, in hard truth, those lessons have already served my children well when they sit beside a friend of theirs who has an ill parent etc. Will the side effects and results of pred actually finish the job and kill me? Or will I get hit by a car? I do not know. I try not to worry about it. I try to stay too busy enjoying each day. I almost did not have these days to enjoy them. My illness and the results of it have dramatically altered how I view my difficult children symptoms, my dhs symptoms and my sons issues. I see everything differently than I used to. For all practical purposes I was dead before the pred. Anything I can do now is a blessing. [/QUOTE]
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