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He is not well.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 667629" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>My son has been through this. When he was 18 he was in a jobs program and came home to visit. Within minutes the conflict started. I took a xanex I became so anxious. He grabbed the bottle and put a handful down his throat. He had to go to the hospital to get his stomach pumped. I was so pissed. Not afraid. Pissed.</p><p>This makes sense. But I do not have the same sense of peril. </p><p></p><p>I do agree that the sport is a double edged sword. It may motivate and drive him, and there are substantial rewards. Fame.</p><p></p><p>But the risks are so great. The competition, the high-pressure, the overarching importance of a few minutes of performance, which in itself means nothing at all, but defines everything. The fact that there are so few opportunities, employers. The celebrity aspect. Doing everything in a fishbowl. How hard. And this performance means everything. And means so little when all is said and done. </p><p></p><p>I think our sons have had a hard row to hoe. Intense. Labile. Immature. Brilliant. Gifted. Dramatic. Temperamental. Learning how to manage it all...while performing in the real world in a setting that is highly challenging.</p><p></p><p>I think your son is trying to handle it. He is trying to do it. I do not think he is falling behind. I think he is trying to assimilate hard things. To emancipate and mature with a very difficult set of challenges. That is what I think. Not everybody is a plain vanilla person. Ache is complex as well as vulnerable.</p><p></p><p>I cannot speak to the cultural differences in tendency to suicide or substances. There is always something.</p><p></p><p>I know a lot about a lot...like maturation, like psychological challenges, like what goes wrong and how it does. Like what to do when it does. With my own adult child I have been baffled. Totally running behind and trying to catch up. I am seeing that he is doing it. And instead of madly trying to diagnose what is going wrong, I am able to sit back and to affirm to myself how much better it now is. I am way less freaked out. My son is almost 27. Yours is what? I forget but young. Like 21? Not yet 22? </p><p></p><p>I am still praying that my son will survive long enough to mature. That he will outlive his stupidity.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 667629, member: 18958"] My son has been through this. When he was 18 he was in a jobs program and came home to visit. Within minutes the conflict started. I took a xanex I became so anxious. He grabbed the bottle and put a handful down his throat. He had to go to the hospital to get his stomach pumped. I was so pissed. Not afraid. Pissed. This makes sense. But I do not have the same sense of peril. I do agree that the sport is a double edged sword. It may motivate and drive him, and there are substantial rewards. Fame. But the risks are so great. The competition, the high-pressure, the overarching importance of a few minutes of performance, which in itself means nothing at all, but defines everything. The fact that there are so few opportunities, employers. The celebrity aspect. Doing everything in a fishbowl. How hard. And this performance means everything. And means so little when all is said and done. I think our sons have had a hard row to hoe. Intense. Labile. Immature. Brilliant. Gifted. Dramatic. Temperamental. Learning how to manage it all...while performing in the real world in a setting that is highly challenging. I think your son is trying to handle it. He is trying to do it. I do not think he is falling behind. I think he is trying to assimilate hard things. To emancipate and mature with a very difficult set of challenges. That is what I think. Not everybody is a plain vanilla person. Ache is complex as well as vulnerable. I cannot speak to the cultural differences in tendency to suicide or substances. There is always something. I know a lot about a lot...like maturation, like psychological challenges, like what goes wrong and how it does. Like what to do when it does. With my own adult child I have been baffled. Totally running behind and trying to catch up. I am seeing that he is doing it. And instead of madly trying to diagnose what is going wrong, I am able to sit back and to affirm to myself how much better it now is. I am way less freaked out. My son is almost 27. Yours is what? I forget but young. Like 21? Not yet 22? I am still praying that my son will survive long enough to mature. That he will outlive his stupidity. [/QUOTE]
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