I took him there Thursday. He was ready to go and did not give me a hard time. I did buy him cigarettes on the way there ( I resent having to spend the money on cigarettes, but I guess I kind of feel sorry for him, let him have his cigarettes. Maybe I can use them as a reward type thing.) This is the place that he did not want to go because it was supposedly in a bad neighborhood. Halfway house structured living attached to dual diagnosis PHP. Teaches life skills. Requires them to get a job within 30 days (difficult child told me psychiatrist at Residential Treatment Center (RTC) said he wouldn't clear him to go back to work yet. I can see this since he had 3 hospitalizations in a 3 week period). Haven't heard from him since. He does have his cellphone but no easy child.
So taking a stand and setting a boundary (in this case, telling him that he was not going back home or back to the condo) worked. Given the choice of being homeless or going to aftercare, he chose aftercare.
I'm not going to contact him until next week, unless he calls or texts. Going to give him some space. husband is very resentful of the rude way in which our son has treated him in the past, and I told our son that we would perhaps re evaluate use of cellphone, (or maybe cigarettes or the token amount of cash halfway house lets them have in the care of the manager, though i did not give difficult child any money this time).
It's funny. I think about him a lot, but I don't miss him. Life is so much easier without him around. We can leave our wallets and sleeping pills laying around. We don't have to hide the wine (we don't drink it every day, but sometimes we have a lot left over after a party). I have a lovely built in wine rack in our kitchen, and right now it's got wine bottles in it! Haven't been able to do that in 2 years! It's such a relief not to have to constantly moniter what he is doing. We know he's safe. For a few months, anyway.
husband and i have decided that he will stay out a year, and he needs to prove himself.
So taking a stand and setting a boundary (in this case, telling him that he was not going back home or back to the condo) worked. Given the choice of being homeless or going to aftercare, he chose aftercare.
I'm not going to contact him until next week, unless he calls or texts. Going to give him some space. husband is very resentful of the rude way in which our son has treated him in the past, and I told our son that we would perhaps re evaluate use of cellphone, (or maybe cigarettes or the token amount of cash halfway house lets them have in the care of the manager, though i did not give difficult child any money this time).
It's funny. I think about him a lot, but I don't miss him. Life is so much easier without him around. We can leave our wallets and sleeping pills laying around. We don't have to hide the wine (we don't drink it every day, but sometimes we have a lot left over after a party). I have a lovely built in wine rack in our kitchen, and right now it's got wine bottles in it! Haven't been able to do that in 2 years! It's such a relief not to have to constantly moniter what he is doing. We know he's safe. For a few months, anyway.
husband and i have decided that he will stay out a year, and he needs to prove himself.
