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He won't cope
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<blockquote data-quote="katya02" data-source="post: 195188" data-attributes="member: 2884"><p>Thank you for your thoughts and suggestions. I do believe that suicide is the only 'feasible' option difficult child sees for himself if kicked out, I think he's serious. It's not an immediate threat though, i.e. something that would qualify him for admission. I think it would definitely be good if we sat down and looked at realistic possibilities for housing etc. in town here, in case things go south. I know husband would do better with it; he's so upset at the thought of difficult child having to leave that he assumes the worst. However, difficult child's fear of abandonment is real; I hope that, with a plan in place and not just an order to pack his bags, he might not see himself as totally abandoned. </p><p></p><p>I think his behaviors at college reflected a sense of abandonment, to an extent. Not that anything excuses him using drugs, but he's said that by partway through the semester he had gotten an attitude where he figured it didn't matter if he lived or died, so he did things he never thought he would do. His lack of care and concern for himself, after having been pretty meticulous and health-conscious while at home, suggest to me a sense of being 'out there' totally alone and therefore not really existing. Maybe I'm wrong, it just seems something like that was in the dynamic.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="katya02, post: 195188, member: 2884"] Thank you for your thoughts and suggestions. I do believe that suicide is the only 'feasible' option difficult child sees for himself if kicked out, I think he's serious. It's not an immediate threat though, i.e. something that would qualify him for admission. I think it would definitely be good if we sat down and looked at realistic possibilities for housing etc. in town here, in case things go south. I know husband would do better with it; he's so upset at the thought of difficult child having to leave that he assumes the worst. However, difficult child's fear of abandonment is real; I hope that, with a plan in place and not just an order to pack his bags, he might not see himself as totally abandoned. I think his behaviors at college reflected a sense of abandonment, to an extent. Not that anything excuses him using drugs, but he's said that by partway through the semester he had gotten an attitude where he figured it didn't matter if he lived or died, so he did things he never thought he would do. His lack of care and concern for himself, after having been pretty meticulous and health-conscious while at home, suggest to me a sense of being 'out there' totally alone and therefore not really existing. Maybe I'm wrong, it just seems something like that was in the dynamic. [/QUOTE]
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