Hello from South Carolina

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by MrsLewis, May 22, 2009.

  1. MrsLewis

    MrsLewis New Member

    :D Greetings!
    I'm Michelle... I have a 16 year old who has ADHD, ODD and Asperger's Syndrome (some forms of all but not all inclusive).

    Some days it's easy and others are a real challenge. The biggest obstacle seems to be his inability to effectively socialize properly. We've been through the medicines (worthless from our standpoint) and therapy (again, not really beneficial at all) and I'm finding things that are frighteningly the major reasons why my son hasn't overcome these obstacles.

    I'm always looking and searching for someone who knows where I am and can give me guidance when I've exhausted my resources. This is why I'm here.

    I believe fully on God and know that He's going to show me or lead me where I need to be and up until today, I didn't even know this site existed. Interesting that I find it when I'm ready to throw in the towel, eh?

    I know there's hope and I refuse to give up. After 15 years of fighting for my son, that's too much to just throw in the towel now...

    He's fighting too and wants to be able to do the things that this world expects of him... he also wants to do what is right but he's still young and peer pressure is TOUGH!

    Thank you for letting me join here. I know that I'll find answers that will lead me along this great journey and my son will benefit from my doing this as will I.

    All the best to all who are here and I hope you have a beautiful weekend :D
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Hi, Michelle. Welcome!

    My son is on the spectrum. He's fifteen. I don't think he is ever going to be so-called typical, but he's doing great. Hope to hear more about your son. I don't think medications really help much with autistic spectrum kids. It's all about interventions and all kids are different with different levels of potential for "getting it."
  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Hi and welcome to the board from your NC neighbor! My kids arent in school anymore so I really cant help with resources but I can commiserate.

    Happy Memorial Day!
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Hi! Welcome!!!

    This is an AWESOME sight, esp when you are at the point of throwing in the towel. It is an unusually supportive and friendly place for parents of kids with challenges. My son has the same "alphabet soup" that your son does. And he just finished his LAST day of high school!!! He is doing amazingly well, esp after his early teen years.

    My difficult child, Wiz, is on medications. We found a combination that seems to really help him. But not all kids with Autistic Spectrum Disorders (Asperger's is one) respond well to medications. You also have to tinker with medication combinations until you find what works for YOUR child. Listening to your child about medications is also important. At 15 your son should be giving input on his treatment. NOT deciding it, but able to weigh in on it.

    There ARE therapies that help. If you haven't read "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene I highly recommend it. I also recommend Love and Logic books (www.loveandlogic.com explains them and has different titles to fit your situation) as they were extremely helpful for us, esp in getting my husband on the same page with me.

    One thing that had truly made the biggest difference is helping Wiz deal with sensory issues. I have said that I am a "texture person" for years, long before I had kids. If the texture of something isn't "right" then I can't tolerate it AT ALL. Mushrooms, in any form, are one thing. Same for those microfiber cleaning cloths. ICK.

    I greatly had my eyes opened by the book "The Out Of Sync Child" by Carol Kranowitz. It is all about Sensory Integration Disorder. Also by her book of ways to treat your child's sensory needs (or your own, in my case!) with FUN activities - many of them with stuff you have already! the book of fun things is "The Out Of Sync Child Has Fun".

    Well, that is enough info for now. I do encourage you to go to the FAQ.Board Help forum to learn about the abbreviations we use, etc...

  5. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Hi Michelle! Welcome to the group!

    What kind of stuff is he doing? Aspies are a complicated lot because none of them seem to present the same way!

    Gotta go, just wanted to say "welcome!"

  6. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Welcome from a fellow south carolininan. I'm out of my home now and connection is iffy. I will post my suggestions when I get home.
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Hi Michelle, nice to meet you.

    My son is 12 and on the spectrum. We've had good luck with-Adderall and clonidine.
    Now we trying imiprimene and are up to 40 mg. So far, so good.
    We have just recently reduced his Adderall from 25 mg to 20 mg. As the imiprimine goes up, the Adderall will go down. (My idea, but the psychiatrist agreed.)
    We save the clonidine for when he eats wheat and starts acting out because of allergies.
    We tried prozac and zoloft and he had terrible side effects.

    He has friends, but they're either into sports or video games, so there's not a lot of talking going on. I'm concerned that when he hits HS and has to have a "real" friendship, his differences will really stand out. Right now he can still fake it. He's lucky (I guess) to be living at a time or age when it's cool to tune out other people and keep your nose in your own interests. His friends will call, and he'll play baseball on his PS2 the entire time he's talking, then get bored with-the conversation, and in the middle of the whole thing, say "Bye" and hang up. Or, he'll just hang up. But his friends are equally rude so he's "in."

    Some days he seems like he's matured so much, and other days he's so ... um, how do I say this with-o sounding like a jerk? ... shallow. One dimensional.
    And then the next day, he'll ask a really profound question and want to know the answer, or at least, to have a discussion.

  8. Jena

    Jena New Member

    Hi and welcome!! :)

    share away, hopefully we can help. so many great ppl here i'd be lost without had i not joined

    :) welcome again!
  9. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Welcome, Michelle.

    As far as I know, there is no treatment and no medications for autism in any form. However, the ADHD component can be helped with medications. Similarly, the ODD is not something that can be treated. However, there ARE things you can do to help there.

    A book we can recommend is "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. It deals with the ODD-type of issues which can result from a wide rnge of underlying disorders. The common factor is whwen kids have a short fuse, a high level fo frustration and especially if they also have difficulties expressing themselves fluently, especially when upset. Dr Green refers to them NOT as "Oppositional Defiant Disorder" (a term I hate, because it is very misleading and implies the child is choosing to be difficult) but as "Inflexible Explosive". He also gives tools that can help work around the problems these kids have.

    The aim is to sort it out, to raise your child to be a functioning, happy, productive and independent member of society. For kids who are very different, often we have to use techniques which are very different. If we try to use tight control we often make the problems worse. There ARE other ways that work well.

    More details later, I don't want to overwhelm you. Do a sig for yourself when you can, it saves you having to keep explaining all about yourself each time you post.