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Hello..I am new and pretty awful on the computer
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<blockquote data-quote="StrengthInHim" data-source="post: 542521" data-attributes="member: 14953"><p>Thank you so much for your replies! No I do not get any type of respite. Family and friends listen on the phone but want to offer a lot of advice not respite. They love to take my wonderful, calm 13yr old and give her a break, which she definitely needs. My 2 1/2 year old is extremely intense but in "easier" ways...if that makes sense. I will try to explain my nephew. I guess some situations might help. I actually find him to be a lot calmer than other boys his age. I am a hard parent...which I always thought was right but now I don't know up from down so who knows. </p><p>-anything you tell him to do he will most of the time. This is wonderful!</p><p>-anything you tell him not to do, he will do a million times</p><p>-lies ALOT(lately this seems better but then again maybe I am just not noticing)</p><p>-very sneaky</p><p>-instigator</p><p>-is violent though not at home...I didn't even know he was violent until teachers and his maternal GG brought it up</p><p>-a year ago we were moving and I found months worth of urine between his bed and dresser. so much that it soaked through his dresser wood...the wall was mushy. There was fresh and old urine. Every time he is sent to his room he has to potty. He knows we have to let him(sometimes I make him wait if I know he doesnt need to) so it is not happening due to lack of bathroom access. So, when we moved here I told him if he did that in this room I would move him to a diff room. 1 week after we moved in he saturated his bedroom carpet with urine. I asked him why..."because I am mad at you." So he was moved to a newer smaller bedroom with just his bed. Daily I added his possessions to his room for good behavior and 2 months later moved him to a bigger room. Changing rooms around is a lot of work. We moved here May 2011. Recently in March he earned his original room back. He was very excited telling me he was going to be very respectful of his room and never pee in it. 3 months later his blinds are all torn apart and he is picking at the paint on the walls...and his room smells like a dog has been urinating in there for 2 weeks. So he is back to a different room. Devastating. I will not be switching the rooms anymore. The room he is in now is a good room...just not big and cozy like the other one.</p><p>-He cannot handle any type of change in his life whatsoever. Starting school, ending school, school breaks, moving all brings on about a week of "freaking out" I call it his fever. When he is in his fever...everyone in the home is suffering. He used to visit his GG until I noticed that when she went on vacation for a month he had no fever the entire month. So visits with GG stopped and GG started visiting our home once a week. This turned into a nightmare and we have stopped contact with GG. Which took away my breaks....but we decided she is not healthy for him.-We tried for 2 1/2 yrs with her before this gut wrenching decision.</p><p>-When its just the four of us...there is a lot of laughter, loving, and pure joy. When nephew is home it is all screaming, anger and frustration, by everyone except my wonderful calm husband-which sometimes makes me crazier than anything else! But also I get jeulous of his ability to be that way.</p><p>-he was was violent to animals before we Animals As Natural Therapy. We have had to part with several dogs because of this...devastating. I don't know what would happen if we weren't looking</p><p>-At school he cannot handle not doing things perfectly or if other kids are not doing things perfectly (he goes to a special needs preschool which we are keeping him in another year.</p><p>-His eyes switch over like a light switch...one ex. Him and his teacher were sitting next to each other cutting paper. Nephew stopped looked up at her, without taking his eyes off of her he reached down cut a hole in his shirt with the scissors, his eyes switch back, he smiled and went back to cutting paper. </p><p>-he requires 100% supervision during awake hours.</p><p>I don't know if this relays what it's like but it's at least some of it.</p><p>-thanks for listening!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="StrengthInHim, post: 542521, member: 14953"] Thank you so much for your replies! No I do not get any type of respite. Family and friends listen on the phone but want to offer a lot of advice not respite. They love to take my wonderful, calm 13yr old and give her a break, which she definitely needs. My 2 1/2 year old is extremely intense but in "easier" ways...if that makes sense. I will try to explain my nephew. I guess some situations might help. I actually find him to be a lot calmer than other boys his age. I am a hard parent...which I always thought was right but now I don't know up from down so who knows. -anything you tell him to do he will most of the time. This is wonderful! -anything you tell him not to do, he will do a million times -lies ALOT(lately this seems better but then again maybe I am just not noticing) -very sneaky -instigator -is violent though not at home...I didn't even know he was violent until teachers and his maternal GG brought it up -a year ago we were moving and I found months worth of urine between his bed and dresser. so much that it soaked through his dresser wood...the wall was mushy. There was fresh and old urine. Every time he is sent to his room he has to potty. He knows we have to let him(sometimes I make him wait if I know he doesnt need to) so it is not happening due to lack of bathroom access. So, when we moved here I told him if he did that in this room I would move him to a diff room. 1 week after we moved in he saturated his bedroom carpet with urine. I asked him why..."because I am mad at you." So he was moved to a newer smaller bedroom with just his bed. Daily I added his possessions to his room for good behavior and 2 months later moved him to a bigger room. Changing rooms around is a lot of work. We moved here May 2011. Recently in March he earned his original room back. He was very excited telling me he was going to be very respectful of his room and never pee in it. 3 months later his blinds are all torn apart and he is picking at the paint on the walls...and his room smells like a dog has been urinating in there for 2 weeks. So he is back to a different room. Devastating. I will not be switching the rooms anymore. The room he is in now is a good room...just not big and cozy like the other one. -He cannot handle any type of change in his life whatsoever. Starting school, ending school, school breaks, moving all brings on about a week of "freaking out" I call it his fever. When he is in his fever...everyone in the home is suffering. He used to visit his GG until I noticed that when she went on vacation for a month he had no fever the entire month. So visits with GG stopped and GG started visiting our home once a week. This turned into a nightmare and we have stopped contact with GG. Which took away my breaks....but we decided she is not healthy for him.-We tried for 2 1/2 yrs with her before this gut wrenching decision. -When its just the four of us...there is a lot of laughter, loving, and pure joy. When nephew is home it is all screaming, anger and frustration, by everyone except my wonderful calm husband-which sometimes makes me crazier than anything else! But also I get jeulous of his ability to be that way. -he was was violent to animals before we Animals As Natural Therapy. We have had to part with several dogs because of this...devastating. I don't know what would happen if we weren't looking -At school he cannot handle not doing things perfectly or if other kids are not doing things perfectly (he goes to a special needs preschool which we are keeping him in another year. -His eyes switch over like a light switch...one ex. Him and his teacher were sitting next to each other cutting paper. Nephew stopped looked up at her, without taking his eyes off of her he reached down cut a hole in his shirt with the scissors, his eyes switch back, he smiled and went back to cutting paper. -he requires 100% supervision during awake hours. I don't know if this relays what it's like but it's at least some of it. -thanks for listening! [/QUOTE]
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