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Hello! New here and I desperetely need help
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<blockquote data-quote="sandmama" data-source="post: 311953" data-attributes="member: 8199"><p>1/Who originally diagnosed him and what medications is he on currently? A child pshychiatrist gave him an official diagnosis of ADHD which is the only thing he has a current prescription for. It is for Vyvanse 50mg, but has refused to take it for the last 1.5 weeks. He told me he would like a lower dose so when he is at school he doesnt feel as zoned out when he is in a group of friends talking. We have an appointment next wed for that prescription.</p><p> </p><p>2/Is he getting worse? His behavior is getting worse. His outbursts, his attitude, his negativity, basically his whole personality. He is defiant at any request we ask of him, calls us names (not cussing usually, but "pea-sized brain big fat hippo kind of stuff) This morning I touched his oatmeal packet and he refused to eat it after that. He complained about the way I washed his clothes, the way I made his lunch...</p><p> </p><p>3/Although his biological father is no longer parenting him and possibly not even in the picture, your child DOES still carry 50% of his genes. Lovely, I know. Does your ex have any psychiatric problems, diagnosed or undiagnosed? Does he abuse substances, which is a big red flag for undiagnosed mood disorders? Unfortunately, his stepfather is not the one who gave him his genetic makeup. What is his attitude toward your son? Does he believe he is mentally ill or neurologically impaired or both? </p><p> </p><p>There aren't any conditions I know of on his bio-dad's side. They are all a little off and we don't have contact with any of those relatives. He sees his Dad a few times a year and will usually come and spend holidays with us. It is a very cordial relationship that husband and I have built with him for the sake of Austin. husband's attitude toward him has always been very loving and kind, but strict and expects our children to behave and work with the family. husband really doesn't know what to think at this point. He works very long hours and spent many years working out of town these last few years. I am the one who deals with all of this.</p><p> </p><p>4/How was your son's early development? Did he make strong eye contact with you and others, even strangers? Was he interactive? Did he speak on time and appropriately? Play with toys appropriately? Any strange quirks such as making high pitch throat noises, repeating things, flapping arms, lining up toys, freaking out when he had to transition from one activity to another, cover his ears or eyes when things were too loud or bright or stimulating? Does he have any obsessive interests? Does he know how to make friends and have a give-and-take conversation? </p><p> </p><p>That's the thing. Austin is amazing. He did everything early, is smart enough to be taking high school math and science (he is an 8th grader) classes, he socializes well though thinks all the boys at school are nerds and refused to hang out with any of them, and is great about not wanting to be around people who cuss or make bad choices. This behavior is ONLY at home. When he was younger 1-3 grade and I would take him to a behavioral therapist, we didn't get ANY help because he would charm them and they really couldn't see what I was ever talking about.</p><p> </p><p>I tried to put a signature in, but it didn't work. I will try again <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p> </p><p>Thanks for any help or suggestions. I guess I need a system to know exactly how to handle each situation. For instance, if he refuses to take a shower when I ask him, or he turns and demands for me to get to get his towel for him, how do I respond? What I am doing is not working. I have gone the whole lavish him with positive behavior support or take away all privledges and nothing seems to work. </p><p> </p><p>It has been a long time since he has threatened to hurt anyone or himself, at least a year, but that thought still lingers in my mind. He doesn't hang out with people who are not good influences, at least outside of school. We are very active in our church an he has a good support of good kids there. It's just his attitude toward the three of us in our family. I don't understand. I am not worried about any kind of substance abuse, I just don't know what to do, and because of my past experiences with mental health professionals I don't have very much faith in that route. UGH!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="sandmama, post: 311953, member: 8199"] 1/Who originally diagnosed him and what medications is he on currently? A child pshychiatrist gave him an official diagnosis of ADHD which is the only thing he has a current prescription for. It is for Vyvanse 50mg, but has refused to take it for the last 1.5 weeks. He told me he would like a lower dose so when he is at school he doesnt feel as zoned out when he is in a group of friends talking. We have an appointment next wed for that prescription. 2/Is he getting worse? His behavior is getting worse. His outbursts, his attitude, his negativity, basically his whole personality. He is defiant at any request we ask of him, calls us names (not cussing usually, but "pea-sized brain big fat hippo kind of stuff) This morning I touched his oatmeal packet and he refused to eat it after that. He complained about the way I washed his clothes, the way I made his lunch... 3/Although his biological father is no longer parenting him and possibly not even in the picture, your child DOES still carry 50% of his genes. Lovely, I know. Does your ex have any psychiatric problems, diagnosed or undiagnosed? Does he abuse substances, which is a big red flag for undiagnosed mood disorders? Unfortunately, his stepfather is not the one who gave him his genetic makeup. What is his attitude toward your son? Does he believe he is mentally ill or neurologically impaired or both? There aren't any conditions I know of on his bio-dad's side. They are all a little off and we don't have contact with any of those relatives. He sees his Dad a few times a year and will usually come and spend holidays with us. It is a very cordial relationship that husband and I have built with him for the sake of Austin. husband's attitude toward him has always been very loving and kind, but strict and expects our children to behave and work with the family. husband really doesn't know what to think at this point. He works very long hours and spent many years working out of town these last few years. I am the one who deals with all of this. 4/How was your son's early development? Did he make strong eye contact with you and others, even strangers? Was he interactive? Did he speak on time and appropriately? Play with toys appropriately? Any strange quirks such as making high pitch throat noises, repeating things, flapping arms, lining up toys, freaking out when he had to transition from one activity to another, cover his ears or eyes when things were too loud or bright or stimulating? Does he have any obsessive interests? Does he know how to make friends and have a give-and-take conversation? That's the thing. Austin is amazing. He did everything early, is smart enough to be taking high school math and science (he is an 8th grader) classes, he socializes well though thinks all the boys at school are nerds and refused to hang out with any of them, and is great about not wanting to be around people who cuss or make bad choices. This behavior is ONLY at home. When he was younger 1-3 grade and I would take him to a behavioral therapist, we didn't get ANY help because he would charm them and they really couldn't see what I was ever talking about. I tried to put a signature in, but it didn't work. I will try again :) Thanks for any help or suggestions. I guess I need a system to know exactly how to handle each situation. For instance, if he refuses to take a shower when I ask him, or he turns and demands for me to get to get his towel for him, how do I respond? What I am doing is not working. I have gone the whole lavish him with positive behavior support or take away all privledges and nothing seems to work. It has been a long time since he has threatened to hurt anyone or himself, at least a year, but that thought still lingers in my mind. He doesn't hang out with people who are not good influences, at least outside of school. We are very active in our church an he has a good support of good kids there. It's just his attitude toward the three of us in our family. I don't understand. I am not worried about any kind of substance abuse, I just don't know what to do, and because of my past experiences with mental health professionals I don't have very much faith in that route. UGH! [/QUOTE]
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