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Help! I don't think I will get through summer with 10 year with ODD/ADD
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 600425" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>I understand.</p><p>I didn't "get it" for a long time either.</p><p> </p><p>So many of our kids are wired differently. It isn't their fault. They react to the world around them very differently than most people do. </p><p> </p><p>The biggest positive impact was when WE (as parents) decided that it wasn't because difficult child "didn't want to"... he literally <em>could not</em>. We had to reduce overload on a dozen different fronts. We put a major focus on trying to get quality sleep, and quality down-time. We literally shut down our lives. And when we did... things got better. THEN, and only then, were we in a position to begin to address specific behaviors. Things that had become a pattern but were not acceptable. But because they had gone on for so long, difficult child believed they were "normal". We had to pick ONE behavior, and work on it for months. But each one we conquered made the next one easier... and sometimes, (more often lately), difficult child would even figure out that if X is a problem, then Y probably is too.</p><p> </p><p>I know she doesn't have the diagnosis for it, but if you read up on Asperger's... you may find that the parenting techniques that work for Aspies might help you as well. Ignore the technical stuff. They get too caught up in trying to help you figure out if the kid is Aspie or not. Get the ones with practical advice - like "Be Different" by John Elder Robinson.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 600425, member: 11791"] I understand. I didn't "get it" for a long time either. So many of our kids are wired differently. It isn't their fault. They react to the world around them very differently than most people do. The biggest positive impact was when WE (as parents) decided that it wasn't because difficult child "didn't want to"... he literally [I]could not[/I]. We had to reduce overload on a dozen different fronts. We put a major focus on trying to get quality sleep, and quality down-time. We literally shut down our lives. And when we did... things got better. THEN, and only then, were we in a position to begin to address specific behaviors. Things that had become a pattern but were not acceptable. But because they had gone on for so long, difficult child believed they were "normal". We had to pick ONE behavior, and work on it for months. But each one we conquered made the next one easier... and sometimes, (more often lately), difficult child would even figure out that if X is a problem, then Y probably is too. I know she doesn't have the diagnosis for it, but if you read up on Asperger's... you may find that the parenting techniques that work for Aspies might help you as well. Ignore the technical stuff. They get too caught up in trying to help you figure out if the kid is Aspie or not. Get the ones with practical advice - like "Be Different" by John Elder Robinson. [/QUOTE]
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Help! I don't think I will get through summer with 10 year with ODD/ADD
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