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Help I need help with my 3 year old!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 202316" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I"m coming late to this thread. I tend to not post much here because my kids are now all so much older and this thread seemed to be getting plenty of response - but I just want to say, karif - you sound like a really great mother, you are working so incredibly hard for this little boy and you seem to feel that there is something there in him that is needing this help, to be able to find a way out and show the world that he really is a good kid inside.</p><p></p><p>He's been through the wars, it seems. So have you. Right now, while you're trying to get a handle on what is wrong as well as trying to find ways to help him, this is perhaps the worst time of all, I feel. It's the time you feel most alone, most bewildered, most frustrated - once you begin to get a sense of direction and of something that seems to be working, I think it does begin to get a little easier.</p><p></p><p>It is very difficult to get experts to give you confirmed labels at 3. Mind you, we succeeded. Also, labels often get changed as the child gets older - other signs or symptoms become more apparent later on, understanding changes - although generally this is only medical science trying to get a handle, the child is still the same person with the same difficulties.</p><p></p><p>Something else to consider - whatever gets diagnosed, there can often be other conditions with it. Or if not, if your child is diagnosed with a syndrome (I see Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) is listed) then you can find a range of problems all under that umbrella, a lot of problems with themselves can also have their own labels. You can end up feeling like you're drowning in alphabet soup! Also, because there is generally no such thing as a magic bullet, a one-pill-heals-all treatment, there can be many different ways to treat a condition. And maybe different times as well. For example, we've had difficult child 3 on medications since he was 3. We've also had him in various different therapies - occupational therapy, speech therapy, psychological counselling, cognitive behaviour therapy, remedial educational assistance, early intervention - we do what we can, when it seems appropriate.</p><p></p><p>We have had experience with risperdal, we've also had experience with stimulants. We have not had experience with Abilify.</p><p></p><p>With our two boys, both took risperdal. The older one found even a tiny dose (quarter of the smallest tablet) sedated him and also made him hungry. He doubled his weight in six months. The younger one was on a whole tablet which later got increased even further - no sedation. And he stayed skinny. Mind you, when he went off the risperdal (it was making little difference and costing a lot for no gain) he lost weight, which panicked the doctor. difficult child 1 also lost weight when he came off risperdal, but because he'd also grown older and bigger, he didn't lose all he'd gained. But any fat turned back into muscle and he's back to what I think he would have been anyway, in terms of his physical appearance.</p><p></p><p>So yes, weight gain can be a problem but not always. And if/when he comes off risperdal, the weight should re-stabilise. If you're concerned, give him healthy food that is lower in fat, sugar and refined carbs. Plenty of fresh vegetables and some fruit in moderation. But I wouldn't limit his overall intake, especially if you're happy that he's eating at last. Maybe grab the chance to expose him to a wide variety of foods? We've had a rough time with all three of our youngest kids having Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) issues as part of their Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD). Plus Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - oh, delightful! Three of them, each with their own different obsessions, phobias and sensory issues, all clashing! But it did work out, we all kept our sense of humour.</p><p></p><p>What I'm saying - even in the same family, drug reactions can be very different.</p><p></p><p>I hope you can get to the bottom of the vomiting. There are so many possibilities. difficult child 3 had nausea and vomiting but in his case we're fairly sure it was entirely due to anxiety. This was after exhaustive medical investigation to rule out a physical cause - necessary, I think.</p><p></p><p>Something else we observed - our Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids have taken longer to mature, and to reach various milestones. This doesn't mean they are "retarded" to use a word that is no longer politically correct. It's quite odd. But our boys are both very bright, well above average. However, they took/are taking a lot longer to do things like sleeping through the night, toilet training (which seemed to happen in reverse order!), doing some things independently. But sometimes in other areas - they were way ahead, almost freakishly. Less so with difficult child 1. </p><p></p><p>I said earlier, we're a lot further down the road now. Both our boys are doing so much better than we ever thought possible. It's been hard work, I've got a lot more grey hair now, but I'm beginning to relax a lot more now.</p><p></p><p>Be good to yourself, don't feel bad when things go wrong. Here's hoping the risperdal keeps things a bit calmer in your household for now.</p><p></p><p>Keep us posted on how you're getting on.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 202316, member: 1991"] I"m coming late to this thread. I tend to not post much here because my kids are now all so much older and this thread seemed to be getting plenty of response - but I just want to say, karif - you sound like a really great mother, you are working so incredibly hard for this little boy and you seem to feel that there is something there in him that is needing this help, to be able to find a way out and show the world that he really is a good kid inside. He's been through the wars, it seems. So have you. Right now, while you're trying to get a handle on what is wrong as well as trying to find ways to help him, this is perhaps the worst time of all, I feel. It's the time you feel most alone, most bewildered, most frustrated - once you begin to get a sense of direction and of something that seems to be working, I think it does begin to get a little easier. It is very difficult to get experts to give you confirmed labels at 3. Mind you, we succeeded. Also, labels often get changed as the child gets older - other signs or symptoms become more apparent later on, understanding changes - although generally this is only medical science trying to get a handle, the child is still the same person with the same difficulties. Something else to consider - whatever gets diagnosed, there can often be other conditions with it. Or if not, if your child is diagnosed with a syndrome (I see Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) is listed) then you can find a range of problems all under that umbrella, a lot of problems with themselves can also have their own labels. You can end up feeling like you're drowning in alphabet soup! Also, because there is generally no such thing as a magic bullet, a one-pill-heals-all treatment, there can be many different ways to treat a condition. And maybe different times as well. For example, we've had difficult child 3 on medications since he was 3. We've also had him in various different therapies - occupational therapy, speech therapy, psychological counselling, cognitive behaviour therapy, remedial educational assistance, early intervention - we do what we can, when it seems appropriate. We have had experience with risperdal, we've also had experience with stimulants. We have not had experience with Abilify. With our two boys, both took risperdal. The older one found even a tiny dose (quarter of the smallest tablet) sedated him and also made him hungry. He doubled his weight in six months. The younger one was on a whole tablet which later got increased even further - no sedation. And he stayed skinny. Mind you, when he went off the risperdal (it was making little difference and costing a lot for no gain) he lost weight, which panicked the doctor. difficult child 1 also lost weight when he came off risperdal, but because he'd also grown older and bigger, he didn't lose all he'd gained. But any fat turned back into muscle and he's back to what I think he would have been anyway, in terms of his physical appearance. So yes, weight gain can be a problem but not always. And if/when he comes off risperdal, the weight should re-stabilise. If you're concerned, give him healthy food that is lower in fat, sugar and refined carbs. Plenty of fresh vegetables and some fruit in moderation. But I wouldn't limit his overall intake, especially if you're happy that he's eating at last. Maybe grab the chance to expose him to a wide variety of foods? We've had a rough time with all three of our youngest kids having Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) issues as part of their Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD). Plus Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - oh, delightful! Three of them, each with their own different obsessions, phobias and sensory issues, all clashing! But it did work out, we all kept our sense of humour. What I'm saying - even in the same family, drug reactions can be very different. I hope you can get to the bottom of the vomiting. There are so many possibilities. difficult child 3 had nausea and vomiting but in his case we're fairly sure it was entirely due to anxiety. This was after exhaustive medical investigation to rule out a physical cause - necessary, I think. Something else we observed - our Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids have taken longer to mature, and to reach various milestones. This doesn't mean they are "retarded" to use a word that is no longer politically correct. It's quite odd. But our boys are both very bright, well above average. However, they took/are taking a lot longer to do things like sleeping through the night, toilet training (which seemed to happen in reverse order!), doing some things independently. But sometimes in other areas - they were way ahead, almost freakishly. Less so with difficult child 1. I said earlier, we're a lot further down the road now. Both our boys are doing so much better than we ever thought possible. It's been hard work, I've got a lot more grey hair now, but I'm beginning to relax a lot more now. Be good to yourself, don't feel bad when things go wrong. Here's hoping the risperdal keeps things a bit calmer in your household for now. Keep us posted on how you're getting on. Marg [/QUOTE]
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