Help I need help with my 4 year old
We went to UCI yesterday to the child development pediatrician. She examined him. She then turned to me and said " we are giving him the diagnosis of Autism". I said thank you. She was stunned that I thanked her. I told her all that we had been through then she understood. She also feels he has fetal alcohol syndrome but does not want to give him that diagnosis yet because she wants us to go to the gentetic doctor to see if there are any genetic concerns. I am so excited and hopeful now. YEah us!! I never thought I would say that but yeah!!!
graceupongrace
New Member
Karif,
Glad you feel you made some progress. Sometimes a diagnosis helps in that it provides an explanation for all the behavior that seems to defy explanation.
My difficult child is much older, and has a different diagnosis, but I just wanted to wish you well and send supportive hugs.
Glad you feel you made some progress. Sometimes a diagnosis helps in that it provides an explanation for all the behavior that seems to defy explanation.
My difficult child is much older, and has a different diagnosis, but I just wanted to wish you well and send supportive hugs.
tiredmommy
Well-Known Member
I'm glad you're starting to get some answers, hopefully a good treatment and behavior plan will follow!
BusynMember
Well-Known Member
Hi. I'm glad you are on the right track. As for fetal alcohol syndrome, the actual diagnosis. of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) I believe shows up on a genetics test. However fetal alcohol effects don't, and they are pretty much the same as the syndrome. I have a great book for you. It's an oldie but goodie for kids who have fetal alcohol issues...it's called "Fantastic Antone Succeeds." You'd have to Google it up and look up the author. If he has this, he will need lifelong caretaking. There was an interesting article on Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) adults who were relieved to find out why they never learned from their mistakes and were always in trouble. They sort of need to be saved from themselves as they have very real organic brain damage from the alcohol and can not learn from their mistakes. It's not on purpose either. Another great book is "The Broken Cord" by Michael Dorris who adopted a son who ended up having Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS). He didn't know it at the time and it took a long time before Adam was diagnosed. I read up on this before we were sure that our son didn't have alcohol affects. Well, at least they aren't severe enough that he doesn't "get" right from wrong. He does and is very obedient. ((((Hugs)))) and good luck to you.
Karif,
I am THRILLED for you!!! Most people are sad because they don't "get it" that autism is a whole spectrum of problems but they can ALL be treated. While not all kids on the autistic spectrum will live "normal" lives, there is so much more room for hope now than their used to be. Most people still think an autistic child doesn't interact with the world at all, just sits and rocks and flaps.
It just ain't so! With the autism diagnosis you have SO MANY doors to therapy open, and so many new therapies are being used!! Be SURE to get in to a good private Occupational Therapist (OT) for help with sensory issues. It is PROVEN that brushing therapy can help REWIRE the BRAIN. I don't know of any other therapy that is shown to do this. The earlier you start it the more progress the child can make! I never would have believed it if my own children hadn't made so much progress! In 2nd grade my son missed 9 o rmore days every QUARTER because he was so overwhelmed he would just start vibrating, visibly trembling with too much sensory overload. He also would get pale and if I didn't keep him home he ended up getting sick. We did the Occupational Therapist (OT) starting in first grade. By third grade he missed 2 days ALL YEAR due to sensory overload!! They were in the first month of school, after that he was just fine and eager to go to school every day.
There are also a lot of programs that started in the last few years, esp withing the head start group, that target autism specifically.
It really is a hopeful diagnosis now, but most people don't know it.
He may need medications to deal with symptoms, and that may always be true. But it is due to very real differences in how his brain is made. Adding the alcohol effects just means it will be harder, and medication may be more necessary. Just make sure you start with a very low dose and increase very slowly. I ask the doctor to start my kids (and me!) at half the normal starting dose and increase twice as slowly. So if 10 mgs to start, with an increase to 20 mgs after a week is the "usual", then we start at 5 mgs and increase it by 5 more mgs after 2 weeks. It drives our pediatrician nuts, because she wants quick progress, but that is her problem. She isn't home to deal with any potential problems. I am. And, more importantly, the child is on the front line of any problems.
Enjoy your happiness in having a diagnosis. Know that we are happy that you now have a road map to help guide you!
I am THRILLED for you!!! Most people are sad because they don't "get it" that autism is a whole spectrum of problems but they can ALL be treated. While not all kids on the autistic spectrum will live "normal" lives, there is so much more room for hope now than their used to be. Most people still think an autistic child doesn't interact with the world at all, just sits and rocks and flaps.
It just ain't so! With the autism diagnosis you have SO MANY doors to therapy open, and so many new therapies are being used!! Be SURE to get in to a good private Occupational Therapist (OT) for help with sensory issues. It is PROVEN that brushing therapy can help REWIRE the BRAIN. I don't know of any other therapy that is shown to do this. The earlier you start it the more progress the child can make! I never would have believed it if my own children hadn't made so much progress! In 2nd grade my son missed 9 o rmore days every QUARTER because he was so overwhelmed he would just start vibrating, visibly trembling with too much sensory overload. He also would get pale and if I didn't keep him home he ended up getting sick. We did the Occupational Therapist (OT) starting in first grade. By third grade he missed 2 days ALL YEAR due to sensory overload!! They were in the first month of school, after that he was just fine and eager to go to school every day.
There are also a lot of programs that started in the last few years, esp withing the head start group, that target autism specifically.
It really is a hopeful diagnosis now, but most people don't know it.
He may need medications to deal with symptoms, and that may always be true. But it is due to very real differences in how his brain is made. Adding the alcohol effects just means it will be harder, and medication may be more necessary. Just make sure you start with a very low dose and increase very slowly. I ask the doctor to start my kids (and me!) at half the normal starting dose and increase twice as slowly. So if 10 mgs to start, with an increase to 20 mgs after a week is the "usual", then we start at 5 mgs and increase it by 5 more mgs after 2 weeks. It drives our pediatrician nuts, because she wants quick progress, but that is her problem. She isn't home to deal with any potential problems. I am. And, more importantly, the child is on the front line of any problems.
Enjoy your happiness in having a diagnosis. Know that we are happy that you now have a road map to help guide you!
aaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so frustrated with the school district. I called today to talk to the school pshy about my difficult child. I told her that the doctor felt that his diagnosis of pica was life threatening and I want an Occupational Therapist (OT) evauluation. We have been asking for this for almost a year and they keep giving us the run around. She said " oh well I guess we need to put that in the IEP next month" and I need to come out and reevaluate him because we just don't see any autisim in the classroom. I said but we have a diagnosis from the doctor and she said that they need to do there own evaluation. Like a doctors isn't good enough or something. I just don't know what to do at this point. I thought this would help getting not one but three differant doctors to agree that he is autistic. What else will it take?
Potty training is slow but being successful. I went on beyondconsequences.com and they had some helpful info. My difficult child had a 20 minute tantrum yesterday over a movie. He wanted Shrek rewound to the exact spot that he wanted over and over and over again. After an hour of this I took it away and needless to say he went balastic. I had to hold him and wrap him in a blanket. He finally calmed down. Boy is he exhausting sometimes. Sometimes I just feel like I need a break.
ok so a lot has been going on latley. We started back to school after having a month off. My difficult child is in a Special Education preschool at our local public school. We also went to a camp for autstic kids and their siblings. That was great and a great place to go to get help and info from other parents. When we started back to school with a new teacher, suddenly the teacher is saying " oh he is wonderful and does everything the way he supposed to in class". We went to an IEP and I said I cannot beleive that my son will sit in a center for more than a couple of seconds. The teacher then admitted that none of the kids really sit that long. Isn't it interesting that he had behavioral problems last year which was just a month ago, which I never asked or insisted on services. Suddenly I ask for services and want his qualifying diagnosis changed to autism. Then he is a wonderful kid that has no problems. I get so frustrated I know they are lying. I just can't prove it. They are fighting me on everything. I just want help for my son. We go to a neuro pshyc next week it will be interesting to find out what she has to say. I will let you guys know. Does anyone have any info on pushing school districts?
I just want to say how much I admire you. Of course we all do our best for our kids but you really stand out to me as the mom that I would like to have if it was me who had challenges like your difficult child. No advice or wisdom here...just hugs and huge respect for the effort you're making.
Sarah
Sarah
So we have been really bust the last month getting more doctors opions, therapy and IEP's. I spend more time taking my difficult child to appts. than I do any of my other kids at this point.We had a scare this week. We are going to a new therapist a combination Occupational Therapist (OT)/ABA that we are paying for ourselves because the school district is dragging there feet. She asked what kind of week I had. I said well he is always violent just some days are better than others. She asked for some examples. I told her about how he got a knife out of the drawer and ran after my 8 year old trying to stab her. My husband took it away and put him on time out letting him know this was not acceptable. She looked at me and said I think I have to call CPS on this. I was floored. I was so upset. I left and calle the owner of this therapy place. She said that she would not call and we are goint to continue therapy there but we are going to see the owner instead. She has a special needs child and understands some of what we are going through. I don't know what the right thing to do. I feel like if I am completley honest they will take my son away or call CPS but if I'm not honest I won't get to work on real problems. Anyone have any suggestions?
karif,
Please start a new thread. I am not a moderator, just a longtime member. We usually start a new thread for each problem. We know that overall the problems are caused by the illness usually, but every event pretty much gets its own post.
It is VERY hard to sort through all that has been posted to find out what the current problem is. I know I am overwhelmed by the length of this post. I don't know what you have or have not done to get "experts" to help you out and it is just not realistic to expect us to sort through so many posts to figure out what problem you are asking about.
I hope this is not seen as rude. I just wanted to let you know why you may not have gotten as many posts and how hard it is for us to read everything every time you post. a new question. (Most posts only run for a few days to a week or so.)
thanks.
Please start a new thread. I am not a moderator, just a longtime member. We usually start a new thread for each problem. We know that overall the problems are caused by the illness usually, but every event pretty much gets its own post.
It is VERY hard to sort through all that has been posted to find out what the current problem is. I know I am overwhelmed by the length of this post. I don't know what you have or have not done to get "experts" to help you out and it is just not realistic to expect us to sort through so many posts to figure out what problem you are asking about.
I hope this is not seen as rude. I just wanted to let you know why you may not have gotten as many posts and how hard it is for us to read everything every time you post. a new question. (Most posts only run for a few days to a week or so.)
thanks.
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