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Help me sort out my feelings...
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<blockquote data-quote="CAmom" data-source="post: 147892" data-attributes="member: 1835"><p>I need some feedback from ya'll in order to get a grip on what's bothering me here and how to best try to explain it to my son.</p><p></p><p>He's always been very independent in terms of feeling comfortable out and about in the world, i.e., quite happy to go from one friend's home to the next, bascially coming home to roost. We've been okay with that for the most part, but there have been times when we've felt that he needed to be reined back in and reminded that he's part of a family unit.</p><p></p><p>Even though he's 18 now and is actively participating in a job-placement program, he still lives at home, and we provide his cell phone and an allowance (until he gets a job), and so expect him to complete the chores we've laid out in return and also some amount of participation in family matters. </p><p></p><p>As he did as child and young teen, he sleeps over at a friend's house or has a friend here once a week or so. We're okay with that. We're even okay when he does so on a Friday and then a Saturday night.</p><p></p><p>This weekend, however, he spent Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights at different friends' homes, basically only showing up at home for a shower, a change of clothes, and a meal (which he makes himself). </p><p></p><p>I'm not sure exactly why, but I'm NOT okay with that and feel as though some line has been crossed into the "taking advantage" department. I've told him that we need to sit down and have a chat, but I'm not sure exactly how to explain what I'm feeling. </p><p></p><p>Any suggestions?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CAmom, post: 147892, member: 1835"] I need some feedback from ya'll in order to get a grip on what's bothering me here and how to best try to explain it to my son. He's always been very independent in terms of feeling comfortable out and about in the world, i.e., quite happy to go from one friend's home to the next, bascially coming home to roost. We've been okay with that for the most part, but there have been times when we've felt that he needed to be reined back in and reminded that he's part of a family unit. Even though he's 18 now and is actively participating in a job-placement program, he still lives at home, and we provide his cell phone and an allowance (until he gets a job), and so expect him to complete the chores we've laid out in return and also some amount of participation in family matters. As he did as child and young teen, he sleeps over at a friend's house or has a friend here once a week or so. We're okay with that. We're even okay when he does so on a Friday and then a Saturday night. This weekend, however, he spent Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights at different friends' homes, basically only showing up at home for a shower, a change of clothes, and a meal (which he makes himself). I'm not sure exactly why, but I'm NOT okay with that and feel as though some line has been crossed into the "taking advantage" department. I've told him that we need to sit down and have a chat, but I'm not sure exactly how to explain what I'm feeling. Any suggestions? [/QUOTE]
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