HELP: ODD: What can I do?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by janey66, Aug 11, 2007.

  1. janey66

    janey66 New Member

    I know this board is for under 5 -- my daughter is 6 -- but she has had the same behavior since birth. This is her:

    - colicky since birth. came out crying and never stopped.
    - not cuddly
    - extremely active
    - very bright
    - refuses to do anything we ask her
    - can be physical toward us
    - talks with a nasty/rude tone-of-voice
    - says harsh things like "you don't love me; i'm going to punch you in the head"
    - great reviews at school, obediant
    - can take a long time to transition or get things done
    - in constant motion
    - daily tantrums
    - just mean to us
    - refuses to brush teeth, let us comb her hair, etc.
    - refuses all medicine, etc.
    - always interrupts
    - blames others
    - punishments have little effect; goes right back to her ways

    Need I go on??
     
  2. wakeupcall

    wakeupcall Well-Known Member

    Janey66, sounds like classic ODD to me! My difficult child (now 11) was that way from day one.....the only difference is he loved and still does love to cuddle. I suggest you read the "Chandler Papers" and "DSM-IV" on the first category of the forums. Interesting read. Have you gotten "The Explosive Child"? It helped me a LOT. I had to let lots of things go that normal parents of normal children don't let go...put them in basket C. We had more to deal with than the normal parents and couldn't possibly address it all or we'd all go off the deep end.

    The weekends are slow around here, but PLEASE know that you're not alone and someone else will be along soon. Me, too!!!
     
  3. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Hi Janey & welcome. I'm sorry you have to be here.
    With the exception of the teeth brushing problem you have pretty much described my daughter at about age 3.5 to 4 years. Have you had her tested for sensory problems? The following can be caused by too much/too little sensory intake:
    - not cuddly
    - extremely active
    - can be physical toward us
    - talks with a nasty/rude tone-of-voice
    - can take a long time to transition or get things done
    - in constant motion
    - daily tantrums
    - refuses to brush teeth, let us comb her hair, etc.
    - refuses all medicine, etc.
    - always interrupts

    How does she get along with her peers?
    Any good friendships?
    Any academic difficulties at school? Sometimes teachers don't emphasize an area of difficulty at this age because they may be assuming the child just needs a little more time to catch on to the concept. This may or may not be the case.
    Does she exhibit normal play? As in: a good imagination, uses toys appropriately?
    Is there any history of developmental issues or mental illness in the tree? Many conditions are highly genetic in nature.
    The other thing is too look at the colick and any physical conditions throughout her infancy and early childhood. My daughter, too, never grew out of the colick. I nursed her until age two, then she immediately went through a year of several ear infections. Her worst problem was her allergies (food and inhalant). She was so sick that she was constantly out sorts. It may have even led to some uneven development for her. Ex: she never learned to roll over to her left side as an infant, she still struggles a bit with gait and has some sleep issues. These may still be symptomatic of an underlying problem that has yet to be diagnosis'd or it may be a result of her being too sickly to develop needed skills in the necessary order so that skills build on top of one another. This may or may not be the case with your daughter. I just thought I'd throw it out there since there is a similar early pattern between them.
     
  4. janey66

    janey66 New Member

    Her social relationships are good. She has on occasion thrown tantrums when a child is distruptive with her toys or uses them in a way that she thinks is wrong. A bit Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)??

    School, so far, has been great.

    Her developmental milestones have always been advanced.

    Mostly, what do I do?
     
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Personally, since ODD almost never is the only thing going on, I'd take her for a more intensive evaluation. She has some markers for things that are beyond ODD and what can look like ODD can be happening because of other childhood disorders. I would take her for a Multi Disciplinary Evaluation at a children's or university hospital for have her tested by a neuropsychologist (very intensive testing). It's not a good idea to try to diagnose yourself based on symptoms. Yes, she has ODD symptoms as do almost all the kids here, but the ODD is caused by different things. And getting to the core of the problem is what helps the most. Not cuddling is NOT an ODD symptom--it could be a neurological problem. I would take the evaluation process further (this is from long experience with wrong diagnosis. and frustrations, etc.) I would want her tested for high functioning autism/Aspergers (these kids are often extremely bright, but rigid and difficult and don't like change) as well as other neurological issues. A neuropsychologist (not Neurologist) is best for that. Good luck!
     
  6. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    I agree about a neuropsychologist evaluation. They taught me about those on this board and we've gotten verbal diagnosis of Aspergers Syndrome (which is great - it's workable!) and what you've described is my difficult child 1! He's in 4th grade now, and we're looking at a much better outlook than before!

    You can find a neuropsychologist in most childrens hospitals or research facilities. It's mind numbing the number and types of tests that they run, but you really get a sense of thoroughness.

    You learn a lot on this board. I had to ask a ton of questions, but you get the hang of it!

    Beth
     
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