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Parent Emeritus
Help please! I need to ask if I was a bad mother. Feel like one.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 609566" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I was so hoping you, of all posters would answer me. Thank you so very much. You are so right. That was not a normal exchange. With him, they never are. I do need to let this go.</p><p></p><p>His birthday is Nov. 1st. I was going to send $100 early because I know he is short of money now due to all this going on, but $100 is a lot of me too. I am going to send an early card and scroll "I love you" on the bottom and send $50, which is also a lot for us. If I send it early, it is done. I don't expect a response or even necessarily want one, but I don't want to drop to his level and ignore his birthday. Although he ignores all of ours...lolol. </p><p></p><p>That will be my only communication with him. I am so sad that I gave birth to this beautiful baby who turned into the grown child from hello, but it is what it is. If I am guilty of anything, I did not mean to be. I gave my all to him and I don't deserve his treatment of me and you're right...I can spend 24/7 on the phone listening to and even acknowledging that his abuse is warranted and it would not be enough. </p><p></p><p>I will go to Al-Anon Thursday morning. I have no idea how much his drinking is affecting his behavior, but I need to listen to the Twelve Steps, tap into my Higher Power, and listen to wise woman talking about detachment. </p><p></p><p>RE, you are such a kind soul. Thanks again. I actually feel better reading your logical and compassionate words. Bless you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 609566, member: 1550"] I was so hoping you, of all posters would answer me. Thank you so very much. You are so right. That was not a normal exchange. With him, they never are. I do need to let this go. His birthday is Nov. 1st. I was going to send $100 early because I know he is short of money now due to all this going on, but $100 is a lot of me too. I am going to send an early card and scroll "I love you" on the bottom and send $50, which is also a lot for us. If I send it early, it is done. I don't expect a response or even necessarily want one, but I don't want to drop to his level and ignore his birthday. Although he ignores all of ours...lolol. That will be my only communication with him. I am so sad that I gave birth to this beautiful baby who turned into the grown child from hello, but it is what it is. If I am guilty of anything, I did not mean to be. I gave my all to him and I don't deserve his treatment of me and you're right...I can spend 24/7 on the phone listening to and even acknowledging that his abuse is warranted and it would not be enough. I will go to Al-Anon Thursday morning. I have no idea how much his drinking is affecting his behavior, but I need to listen to the Twelve Steps, tap into my Higher Power, and listen to wise woman talking about detachment. RE, you are such a kind soul. Thanks again. I actually feel better reading your logical and compassionate words. Bless you. [/QUOTE]
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Help please! I need to ask if I was a bad mother. Feel like one.
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