Help. Son starting Kindergarten

Discussion in 'Special Ed 101' started by 4myson02, Aug 15, 2007.

  1. 4myson02

    4myson02 New Member

    Hi I'm new to the group. My son is starting Kindergarten next week and I'm terrified. I'm a single mom that works fulltime. He has been kicked out of over 5 daycares. I did have him in a home daycare until this past June and decided to move him into the school that would be picking him up after Kindergarten to get him use to it. It wasn't long before the calls started asking me to come and pick my child up. Here are some of the things going on with him...
    Very aggressive
    Hates to be told what to do by anyone.
    Always has to be in charge and the leader.
    Is negative alot of the time
    Throws tantrums and has to be physically picked up and removed from class or area
    The tantrums continue for an hour or more or until he passes out.
    He is constantly touching, pushing, hitting, biting other children.
    The children are afraid to be around him. They usually can start to play nice but by the end he is so bossy they leave.

    I have bc/bs insurance but my deductible has to be met before they pay the little amount they will pay. I see his pediatrician doctor Wed. and two weeks ago his psychiatric/doctor put him on adderal 5mg. I'm just at a loss. Once school does start I will be taking him and picking him up right after. What will happen if this cotinues in the classroom.
  2. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Hi! Welcome to the group. First: what is his diagnosis? You say he's going to a psychiatrist, so what are they treating him for? One of the primary things that your school is going to be looking for is an evalution so that an IEP (individual education plan) can be written. If he has special needs, they would be documented within that with goals and objectives, a possible behavioral plan, etc.

    We were through a number of different preschools (some formal requests that we "take our demons and leave", others were nicer but we still were kicked out!), as they got older, we were actually told to stop listing the different schools because we asked for extra paper.


    Knowledge is power! Ask as many questions as you can think of, because then you'll be better prepared to work with the "professionals" (I use the quotes sarcastically!!). Truthfully, once we got into the right environment, we have had much better results.

    Good luck!
  3. 4myson02

    4myson02 New Member

    He hasn't been diagnosis as of yet. We went to the pshychiatrist a few weeks ago and she put him on adderall. He has calmed down some but doesn't eat and complains his stomach is hurting. Two days after he was kicked out of his daycare. I had just recently placed him at this daycare because I was going to use there after school program for when he started Kindergarten. I was called almost every other day to pick him up and I'm a single parent so it was so upsetting. He would get in trouble for biting, hitting, pushing, and they would go to put him in time out and he would just start screaming at the top of his lungs.

    This would go on for an hour or more and they would call because no one could get him to calm down. He would just sit there and scream. He was at a home daycare before this daycare and I didn't have to many problems and that is probably because she let him do what he wanted most of the time. All the daycares before we're the same with the biting, kicking, hitting teachers, and so on.

    I did at one point take him to the ESC for an evaluation and at first they said no way nothing was wrong with him. I pleaded and got letters from all daycares and they ended up accepting him but the hours they could keep him just weren't enough. So here I am a week before school. He never grew out of it.
  4. Sheila

    Sheila Moderator

    I strongly urge you to send a letter to the school district requesting an evaluation to see if he qualifies for an IEP. There are sample letters in the Sp Ed Archives.

    You can edit out the Parent Report info and submit it to the school district at a later date. Retitle it "Parent Input." If you are wonder "why?" it's because the school district is required to consider parent input when doing the evaluation. The school district is only required to evaluate in areas of "suspected" disability. Writing the report can help the school district "suspect," e.g., behaviors at home, day care, family history of diagnosed disorders such as anxiety, ADHD, bipolar, etc or perhaps undiagnosed problematic behaviors in family members such as substance abuse, alcoholism, etc.

    It's VERY IMPORTANT to send the letter via Certified Mail. The CM kicks in mandated timelines within which the school district has to perform.

    Just as importantly, the letter requesting the evaluation immediately kicks in the "Protections for Children Not Yet Eligible for an IEP" provision of IDEA. Read more about it at

    There is a ton of information in this forum and the Archives you can utilize to help self-educate about IDEA/IEP -- and one or more getting started threads. A good legal website reference is It's going to be important for you to learn about your's and your child's rights.

    Learning the ropes is not done, so don't let it overwhelm you. Your first order of business should be getting the letter in the mail.

    The school district is required by law to evaluate your child. In the event you do not agree with their evaluation, you can request an Independent Education Evaluation (IEE). However, this is a long, long process whe IEE's are involved so if you can swing it, a private multidisciplinary evaluation or neuropsychologist would be a good thing to do.

    Welcome aboard! :D