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Help with 9 year old daugher
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<blockquote data-quote="SearchingForRainbows" data-source="post: 515914" data-attributes="member: 3388"><p>The others have already given you excellent advice and I agree that it sounds like your daughter needs a much more thorough evaluation, and appropriate diagnosis, before much change can occur. Although I'm sure you've already tried these things, until your daughter has been further evaluated, I would continue picking your battles wisely. Respond only to issues where she is in danger of hurting herself, someone else, or destroying property. Ignore the rest no matter how difficult it is. We found that by ignoring difficult child 1, the intensity of his "tantrums" increased at first but gradually, when it began to dawn on him that he wasn't getting the rise out of us that he wanted, they lessened. Don't talk to her when she is in "meltdown" mode. If you have to speak to her, make your sentences short, keep them to five or six words at most. Talk to her in a neutral voice. Let natural consequences take over whenever possible. Although traditional methods of parenting won't work, consequences that are a direct result of her own inappropriate behaviors just might. </p><p></p><p>While I agree that medication can be frightening, if used appropriately, it can help pave the way for positive changes to occur. Try to think of it as if your child had a physical illness. If she had an ear infection, she would need an antibiotic to get well. In much the same way, she might need medication in order to be able to communicate more effectively. </p><p></p><p>Thinking of you today... SFR</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SearchingForRainbows, post: 515914, member: 3388"] The others have already given you excellent advice and I agree that it sounds like your daughter needs a much more thorough evaluation, and appropriate diagnosis, before much change can occur. Although I'm sure you've already tried these things, until your daughter has been further evaluated, I would continue picking your battles wisely. Respond only to issues where she is in danger of hurting herself, someone else, or destroying property. Ignore the rest no matter how difficult it is. We found that by ignoring difficult child 1, the intensity of his "tantrums" increased at first but gradually, when it began to dawn on him that he wasn't getting the rise out of us that he wanted, they lessened. Don't talk to her when she is in "meltdown" mode. If you have to speak to her, make your sentences short, keep them to five or six words at most. Talk to her in a neutral voice. Let natural consequences take over whenever possible. Although traditional methods of parenting won't work, consequences that are a direct result of her own inappropriate behaviors just might. While I agree that medication can be frightening, if used appropriately, it can help pave the way for positive changes to occur. Try to think of it as if your child had a physical illness. If she had an ear infection, she would need an antibiotic to get well. In much the same way, she might need medication in order to be able to communicate more effectively. Thinking of you today... SFR [/QUOTE]
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