Her dog is dead

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by PatriotsGirl, Apr 25, 2011.

  1. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    OMG, I am so heartbroken for her right now. She called me in hysterics yesterday.

    Another casualty of her lifestyle...

    She was at some one's house, was running out on an errand (I am sure for a drug run) and they told her not to worry, her dog could stay and would be safe. Well, the dog got out and must have went looking for difficult child. She was hit by a car. difficult child has been looking for her every day and yesterday found her dead. She is completely devastated and I am afraid this is going to send her into one deep depression.

    I just sat on the phone with her yesterday while she cried. There was nothing I could say except sorry and I loved her and I wished so bad there was something I could do. I think she just needed some one to sit there while she cried. She never made it over for Easter. After I talked to her, she just wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep.

    She is living with two girlfriends. I am not happy about who they are, but do feel better that she is staying in an actual house with women. She told me she has been falling asleep all of the time like she did when she was sick. I told her maybe she needed to see a doctor. She said she is not sick, she is pretty sure it is depression. I asked if she has been taking her antidepressants and she said no, but she did still have them. I think she knows she needs to take them.

    My heart is broken for her. She didn't ask for anything, just an ear. :(
     
  2. KFld

    KFld New Member

    How terrible!! My heart goes out to her. I know my son is so attached to his cat and was devestated when she dissapeared for 3 weeks during a blizzard and was so relieved when she showed up back home out of nowhere, but I was worried about him at the time finding her somewhere as we had all feared she had been hit by a snowplow or something. I hope she gets back on her medications and gets some help. I know how something like this can just send them right off the deep end as they don't need much of an excuse to begin with, so something major like this isn't good.
     
  3. Mom2oddson

    Mom2oddson Active Member

    My heart goes out to your daughter. To lose someone who gives you unconditional love all the time will be so hard for her. Especially where she is at right now. I'll keep your daughter in my prayers.
     
  4. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    So sorry. The loss of a pet is so devastating...
     
  5. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    I am so sorry. I know how devastating the loss of a pet due to vehicles can be - and it is traumatic to say the least. (((sending hugs)))

    However - if there is a silver lining in any of this tragedy? Maybe the depth of love she had for her little S . I realize accidents happen, but when you trust your " friends' with something so precious to you, and they were careless as this? - Maybe she'll start to see them in a different light. One can only hope.

    Again my deepest apologies for her loss.
     
  6. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    I am praying this helps her to hit bottom.....but I hurt so very badly knowing she is hurting so very badly. I wish I could do anything to take that pain away.....
     
  7. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry...It's awful when our g'sfg are hurting. The loss of a pet is awful, they're family members.
     
  8. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I'm so sorry hon. And I know you've also got to be asking yourself what if you'd not made her take her dog. *hugs* to you both. And yes the sleeping with everything else does sound like depression.
     
  9. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Oh...I'm so very sorry for her loss. That had to hit her hard. To be worrying and frantic and then to find her that way. omg I don't know about her, but I'd certainly be looking at my "friends" differently.

    (((hugs))) for both her and you
     
  10. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    Eeeks, so she calls me late yesterday afternoon and tells me her friend that was supposed to retrieve the dog so they could bury her told her all he found was a possum. So she has hope that Sophia may still be out there somewhere. So, she didn't see the dead body - thank heavens!!! I told her I would print up some flyers tomorrow and on Thursday we can go hang them around the area...but I know that chances are, Sophia is gone....
     
  11. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    When you are hunting for a lost dog? You need to post a GOOD picture without ANY background of people places.......JUST the dog - crop the picture if you need to =

    Post this picture in COLOR - PUT REWARD, but do not put HOW MUCH of a reward - most people will NOT accept a reward, and don't offer to the amount or discuss over the phone either. It can be $5.00 - BUT post it like this

    REWARD FOR SAFE RETURN - you can't believe how many sickos there are out there that actually would return a dog from the road expecting a reward. (not kidding)

    ALSO don't just rely on posters within the area you live - at this point your dog has been gone for a week - a dog can travel - can be picked up - or could be put in someones yard and someone likes a small dog and is just WAITING for someone to CLAIM it and do the right thing by the dog. Even small dogs can travel 10 miles a day - get with a pack or be picked up by a dog catcher county OR city, or be taken to a local shelter, or a private shelter.

    Lots of places to check out in your area and within a 50 mile radius. So it's a lot of advertising -

    A lot of towns have web sites that you can check - and a lot of shelters will post pictures and NOT check those pictures just because YOU are so distraught - it's up to you to keep checking.

    Also - I lost a pit bull - I posted a picture of a pit bull - I called the shelter, asked if they had any pitbulls come in. If you work in a shelter you would think the lady would know what a pit bull looks like. She said NOPE - no pitbulls came in. I drove there thinking - What does she know. There in a cage was the dog that was lost. AMAZING. It would have taken her 5 steps to see - had I not gone? That dog would have been put to sleep. Don't assume anyone is smart or cares.

    Your posters KISS --KEEP IT SERIOUSLY SIMPLE

    PICTURE OF DOG IN COLOR - LOST - FEMALE - WEARING PURPLE COLLAR WHEN LOST - FROM XXXXX AREA - REWARD - PHONE NUMBERS (XXX) XXX-XXXX always area code. THATS IT -

    None of this OWNER HEART BROKEN -WE MISS HER - ON MEDICATION - NO ONE CARES - believe me - IT takes up space for a bigger picture........THE LARGER THE PICTURE - THE LARGER THE PHONE NUMBER - THE BETTER -

    PEOPLE ARE SIMPLE - THEY WANT TO KNOW - WHAT THE DOG LOOKS LIKE - THEY CAN"T TELL A BREED - so don't put YORKIE, LHASA SHIHTZU - JUST A PICTURE

    IS THAT DOG WEARING A PURPLE COLLAR? MAYBE ......THAT DOG IN THE LOST AD WAS..WHAT COLOR IS THAT ONE WEARING ? (BLUE) yeah BUT IT COULD BE HER

    IS THAT ONE A HIM OR A HER? (THE AD SAID A HER) - "EXCUSE ME IS THAT DOG A BOY OR A GIRL" oh it's a boy.....NOT HER....too bad we thought we found that lost dog even if it had a blue collar.


    LOOK UP your local animal rescues - ASPCA, COUNTY, CITY shelters - POST PICTURES and keep a record of how many times you call EACH PLACE - CALL EVERY DAY - SQUEEKY TOY GETS THE DOG BACK.

    BEST PLACES TO POST HAND BILLS? PLACES PEOPLE GO EVERY DAY FOR DOGS and dog things - PET SHOPS - GROCERY STORES - CONVENIENCE STORES - DOLLAR GENERAL TYPE STORES - IF YOU LIVE NEAR A DOWTOWN AREA _ YOU MAY HAVE TO GET A PERMIT TO POST ON TELEPHONE POLES. ALSO LOCAL COLLEGE BULLETIN BOARD, TRAILER PARK BULLETIN BOARDS, HOA BULLETIN BOARD - ANY PLACE LIKE THAT COMMUNITY BULLETIN BOARDS -

    DATE YOUR AD with a 4/11 type marker on the back corner and REPLACE THE ADDS EVERY WEEK - BE PRO ACTIVE - THANK THE STORE OWNERS OR MANAGERS AND KEEP A LIST SHOWING THEM YOU AREN"T JUST LEAVING THE FLYERS ABANDONED - YOU WILL BE BACK YOU HAVE A LIST AND YOU ARE REPLACING THEM.

    HOPE THIS HELPS.

    ALSO _ AT THE POLICE STATION IF THEY WILL ALLOW IT - DOUBTFUL - but it never hurts to ask.
     
  12. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    How sad. Sending hugs. DDD
     
  13. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Has she gone down to look in the shelter(s) herself to see if Sophia is there? Any chance Sophia might be trying to make her way back to a place she lived before?
     
  14. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Aw, big hugs. I hate it when there's nothing we can say or do to make things right. I'm sorry for her heartbreak. Animals are so much to so many~
     
  15. Jena

    Jena New Member

    aw i'm so sorry that's sooo sad....... ((Hugs)))
     
  16. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    How horrible! I know exactly what you are going through as difficult child's 10 month goldendoodle was hit and killed by a vehicle last month. There is so much love in these pets. They do provide a place to land for our kids. difficult child put all his love into his pet. His puppy was a true companion for him difficult child watched as his puppy ran into the car. I am so sorry that your daughter had to find her pet days after the accident. It is so heartbreaking. :(
     
  17. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    I think I may have found her! I found a picture today that looked an awful lot like her and snapped a picture and sent it to difficult child. She thinks it may be her, too! Too late to get her today, but I will go on Saturday morning if she can't get there before then. She won't be available for adoption until May 2nd, so we have a few days. Keep your fingers crossed please....
     
  18. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    That is great news!!! I hope it is your daughter's beloved pet!
     
  19. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I hope you're right that it's her and you can get her!
     
  20. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    She is going this morning so I should know soon. She actually came over yesterday after postponing our pizza date for last night. Some one let her borrow their car (she has no license and her permit is suspended) and she drove over here to get more things. She showed off Gucci singlasses she was wearing and said, no, mom, it is not what you think (I never even said anything). She complained one of the girls had stolen her rent money. (I would like to know how she got rent money in the first place...). My response was well, when you live that kind of lifestyle with those kinds of people, maybe you should keep your money on you - like in your bra. She claims she thought she had and I let it go. She is skinny. I hugged her and she felt skinny. I did give her a couple bags of groceries to take with her. Mostly things that I had bought before for her before she left. But there are several frozen dinners in there, cereal, etc..I wanted to say all those typical mom things. But, I held back. I made a nice visit, albeit short. Her brother came in from the pool and she did hug her brother and told him she loves him and to behave in school. :) Wish she took her own advice...

    I think I am getting better at detaching, though. I withheld everything I wanted to lecture her on. I didn't shake her, slap her upside the head, or anything. I told her that I love her and to take care of herself and off she went...and then I sat and wondered how long it would be before she got pulled over and went to jail....
     
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