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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 501188" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Kathy is right. It's good to be angry now, it will motivate you to do what you need to do for yourself and your family. It will soften if and when he goes into recovery. The longer he is gone the more resolved you will become that he must go into recovery to regain your support.</p><p></p><p>I assumed you were going to pay the back rent so that he could move back in and that was all. It sounds like he has a plan to pay forward, even though that plan sounds like it is not legal.</p><p></p><p>FWIW there was a time at the end where our main goal was to get difficult child out of the house in the most painless and permanent way we could. Almost all sober houses have the goal to make the resident self suficient. They realize it is detrimental to go back to the family home for both them and the family. When difficult child went to the sober house they told her the goal was to go into recovery, get a job and move out on her own and support herself. There was never any talk about her coming back home.</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 501188, member: 59"] Kathy is right. It's good to be angry now, it will motivate you to do what you need to do for yourself and your family. It will soften if and when he goes into recovery. The longer he is gone the more resolved you will become that he must go into recovery to regain your support. I assumed you were going to pay the back rent so that he could move back in and that was all. It sounds like he has a plan to pay forward, even though that plan sounds like it is not legal. FWIW there was a time at the end where our main goal was to get difficult child out of the house in the most painless and permanent way we could. Almost all sober houses have the goal to make the resident self suficient. They realize it is detrimental to go back to the family home for both them and the family. When difficult child went to the sober house they told her the goal was to go into recovery, get a job and move out on her own and support herself. There was never any talk about her coming back home. Nancy [/QUOTE]
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