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Family of Origin
Hey, Cedar, or anyone interested in FOO (Family of Origin) issues. Cedar, WHY NOW???
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<blockquote data-quote="Lioness" data-source="post: 660741" data-attributes="member: 18827"><p>Copa I completely sympathise and understand how you feel. Please, please do something for yourself. Small steps. When I get my hair done I feel human again. If you can afford to set aside some money go to a new hairdresser and get them to colour and cut your hair. You will feel so good about yourself. I know working on the inside is most important. Or go to a petting zoo animals always make one feel better. Go for a coffee and cake with a friend. Do something to nurture you. Be a part of your community maybe by volunteering once a week that will make you feel good, helping others. I have a sister who lives 10 minutes up the road to me. I'm always the one to contact her she never, ever calls me. I have seen her twice this year! She has always been jealous of me especially when I was married to my ex as we were wealthy. So for 19 years I saw her maybe 3 times a year. She was always patronising and criticising my parenting skills and my kids. She doesn't have any kids herself. When I went through my divorce she swooped down and "supported" me. Now I'm re married to a good man she doesn't bother with me anymore. She is hypercritical and very judgmental and competitive. My mum was also borderline and played divide and rule with us. She always favoured my sister yet pitted us against each other. My sister was so angry when I got married before her she being the eldest. When my 79 year old Dad comes over from Greece she always makes excuses or goes conveniently on holiday so she doesn't have to see him. She never compromises on anything. mu sister only likes me when she can patronise me but of I'm ok she cuts herself off and is always "busy". My FOO continues down this awful path. My mum stopped talking to her brother and parents around 25 years ago! She stopped talking to me 26 years ago. Has never met my youngest daughter who is now 22! Stopped talking tou eldest sister around 20 years ago. My grandad on my mums side stopped talking to his sisters forever! It is a sickness and I worry for my kids. Their own Dad also cuts people off very easily. They have it on both sides of the family. Can our DNA be beaten? I despair. Whenever I see my sister I feel so awful after about myself as she looks down on me too much. I have decided this year that I love her but don't miss the way she makes me feel. So am not phoning her at all. Just to see how long she goes without contacting me. Both times this year I made the first move I gave her lovely flowers for her birthday and a vintage brooch. She ignored my birthday. I don't want gifts just a card with a nice message. She loves her cat more than any human just like my mum. I too love my cat but I treasure my human relationships too! What's wrong with the world?! Look after yourself and make yourself stronger you deserve it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lioness, post: 660741, member: 18827"] Copa I completely sympathise and understand how you feel. Please, please do something for yourself. Small steps. When I get my hair done I feel human again. If you can afford to set aside some money go to a new hairdresser and get them to colour and cut your hair. You will feel so good about yourself. I know working on the inside is most important. Or go to a petting zoo animals always make one feel better. Go for a coffee and cake with a friend. Do something to nurture you. Be a part of your community maybe by volunteering once a week that will make you feel good, helping others. I have a sister who lives 10 minutes up the road to me. I'm always the one to contact her she never, ever calls me. I have seen her twice this year! She has always been jealous of me especially when I was married to my ex as we were wealthy. So for 19 years I saw her maybe 3 times a year. She was always patronising and criticising my parenting skills and my kids. She doesn't have any kids herself. When I went through my divorce she swooped down and "supported" me. Now I'm re married to a good man she doesn't bother with me anymore. She is hypercritical and very judgmental and competitive. My mum was also borderline and played divide and rule with us. She always favoured my sister yet pitted us against each other. My sister was so angry when I got married before her she being the eldest. When my 79 year old Dad comes over from Greece she always makes excuses or goes conveniently on holiday so she doesn't have to see him. She never compromises on anything. mu sister only likes me when she can patronise me but of I'm ok she cuts herself off and is always "busy". My FOO continues down this awful path. My mum stopped talking to her brother and parents around 25 years ago! She stopped talking to me 26 years ago. Has never met my youngest daughter who is now 22! Stopped talking tou eldest sister around 20 years ago. My grandad on my mums side stopped talking to his sisters forever! It is a sickness and I worry for my kids. Their own Dad also cuts people off very easily. They have it on both sides of the family. Can our DNA be beaten? I despair. Whenever I see my sister I feel so awful after about myself as she looks down on me too much. I have decided this year that I love her but don't miss the way she makes me feel. So am not phoning her at all. Just to see how long she goes without contacting me. Both times this year I made the first move I gave her lovely flowers for her birthday and a vintage brooch. She ignored my birthday. I don't want gifts just a card with a nice message. She loves her cat more than any human just like my mum. I too love my cat but I treasure my human relationships too! What's wrong with the world?! Look after yourself and make yourself stronger you deserve it. [/QUOTE]
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Hey, Cedar, or anyone interested in FOO (Family of Origin) issues. Cedar, WHY NOW???
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