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Family of Origin
Hey, Cedar, or anyone interested in FOO (Family of Origin) issues. Cedar, WHY NOW???
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 661117" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Although I am positive Id be horrified if any of my kids took the path of drugs, no job, etc...and for selfish reason that it isn't what I raised them to be and it looks bad and feels bad to me, I do not have expectations for my adult kids (except that they do join society and do what they should do).</p><p></p><p>Sonic would be easy for somebody to reject, which is why I'm glad God gave him to us. We have always accepted his differences and the help he needs as an adult and don't want him to be different. He is himself and wonderful. Princess turned out really well...such a sweetheart; such a tremendous mom. BuddhaBaby is really reaping the benefits of having had a full time mom and dad her first four months of life (Dad was on unemployment and decided to spend as much time with the baby as he could until it ran out). I did not criticize or judge. The baby is better off having been with them rather than in daycare. Jumlper is going great both as a person and as a hard worker, certain of her career path and certain of what s he wants in life. Even Bart, after a rough start, is a loving presence for his boy, works hard, has a house and all the trimmings. None of my adult kids are setting the world on fire.They quietly do their lives.</p><p></p><p>So what?</p><p></p><p>Being successful in business doesn't make anyone happy.</p><p></p><p>And you often compromise family life for your job, if it becomes too important.</p><p></p><p>"Give th em roots to grow and wings to fly." I believe in this.</p><p></p><p>Copa, your son will find out what he wants to do and can do. And you will get used to the fact that he didn't go to college.</p><p></p><p>I was never one who felt college made you a success. Saw too many people who went a nd were not really doing any better than those who did not.</p><p></p><p>I didn't like school. Of course, school, next to my mother, was my biggest trauma both because of the elementary school bullying and my inability to focus or concentrate and, in the end, giving up without either of m y parens giving one hoot if I got all D's. They didn't exactly encourage me to try so I just went with my feelings...I didn't like school. I would have done better in a non-conventional school.</p><p></p><p>I love to learn and, when I need to, I learn. I probably know more about certain subjects than many college graduates. Psychology is one of them. How dogs tick is another. I once knew more about what was going on in the world than most people. When I want to learn, I don't let go until I've gobbled it up.</p><p></p><p>Copa, whatever your son decides to do with his life, embrace it. He will find something one day. And he will, whether he says so or not, want your approval.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 661117, member: 1550"] Although I am positive Id be horrified if any of my kids took the path of drugs, no job, etc...and for selfish reason that it isn't what I raised them to be and it looks bad and feels bad to me, I do not have expectations for my adult kids (except that they do join society and do what they should do). Sonic would be easy for somebody to reject, which is why I'm glad God gave him to us. We have always accepted his differences and the help he needs as an adult and don't want him to be different. He is himself and wonderful. Princess turned out really well...such a sweetheart; such a tremendous mom. BuddhaBaby is really reaping the benefits of having had a full time mom and dad her first four months of life (Dad was on unemployment and decided to spend as much time with the baby as he could until it ran out). I did not criticize or judge. The baby is better off having been with them rather than in daycare. Jumlper is going great both as a person and as a hard worker, certain of her career path and certain of what s he wants in life. Even Bart, after a rough start, is a loving presence for his boy, works hard, has a house and all the trimmings. None of my adult kids are setting the world on fire.They quietly do their lives. So what? Being successful in business doesn't make anyone happy. And you often compromise family life for your job, if it becomes too important. "Give th em roots to grow and wings to fly." I believe in this. Copa, your son will find out what he wants to do and can do. And you will get used to the fact that he didn't go to college. I was never one who felt college made you a success. Saw too many people who went a nd were not really doing any better than those who did not. I didn't like school. Of course, school, next to my mother, was my biggest trauma both because of the elementary school bullying and my inability to focus or concentrate and, in the end, giving up without either of m y parens giving one hoot if I got all D's. They didn't exactly encourage me to try so I just went with my feelings...I didn't like school. I would have done better in a non-conventional school. I love to learn and, when I need to, I learn. I probably know more about certain subjects than many college graduates. Psychology is one of them. How dogs tick is another. I once knew more about what was going on in the world than most people. When I want to learn, I don't let go until I've gobbled it up. Copa, whatever your son decides to do with his life, embrace it. He will find something one day. And he will, whether he says so or not, want your approval. [/QUOTE]
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Hey, Cedar, or anyone interested in FOO (Family of Origin) issues. Cedar, WHY NOW???
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