Hey guys, Im not dead!

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by DammitJanet, Nov 3, 2013.

  1. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I know I have been neglecting the board lately but things have been crazy around my house and I pretty much just took to my bed with the vapors.

    We are having major stress with youngest, I have not been feeling well, Tony and I are arguing constantly, my car broke down a month ago and isnt fixed yet, then three days ago my brand new fridge died on me!

    I have been attempting to work on stuff on eBay because I have to sell some of the stuff I bought so stupidly is just dumb and I need the money back. Heck I didnt even open the boxes when they came so I am not even entirely sure everything arrived! Now I am trying to go through them all but have no clue where I am going to put toys that are loose in the house where prying hands and eyes dont find them. On top of trying to get my stuff posted, Billy has been bring home stuff from Radio Shack to sell.

    This stupidity with Tony has to stop. Im pretty sure it might when youngest is gone. Who knows though. Yesterday we got into a screaming match about gun cases. Well he screamed and I just sat there looking at him like he had lost his mind. It all was over him saying he needed a soft gun case. I made the comment that he had a gun case. Ahh but it is a hard case and not a soft case. I am not a hunter nor do I study up on all this stuff. I looked at him dumbly and said "oh, I thought you meant soft inside." That got him to try to describe this thing as a "sock" for the gun. I had never in my life heard of a sock for a gun and when I said that he screamed at me that I was just so stupid and must be losing my mind because "when you hear sock the only thing you can think about is feet!" I sorta thought that made sense! LOL. When he made me look them up online, well they do look like big socks. However he wasnt really talking about these socks, he actually meant a bag that you put the gun in and can carry it over your shoulder by a strap. After seeing one, I have seen them on TV shows. Still, this seems to be an asinine thing to argue about. I think if Dr Phil was listening he would say we were arguing about topics, not the actual issues.

    Meanwhile I had my last 4 teeth out about two weeks ago so my mouth is just now completely healing. I cant eat much that isnt really soft. I found out from my dentist that it could take up to 3 months for them to get the approval to do dentures so this will be going on for awhile. Tony isnt being much help in this area at all. He says because he can eat things without his dentures in, I should be able to too. He got his dentures almost a year ago! Ugh.

    So that has been my life recently and with all the trouble we are having here at home I dont feel like I have much to contribute because I feel like we failed miserably. I do drop in and read some. I will try to be here more often.
  2. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member


    Life overwhelms all of us at times but, luckily for the Board, it's not all of us at once. You're entitled to take a break and try to deal with home issues. One thing I would advise is not to say that stuff is being brought home from a specific place to sell on e-bay. I remember you once explained that he has permission to do this but I'd still not say the name on the web.

    I am thinking of you and hope that each day gets a little better...
  3. scent of cedar

    scent of cedar New Member

    I am glad to hear you will be here more often.

    We miss you, you know.

  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    You didn't fail, you're experiencing a set back. There is a difference.

    You're right, though, things have got to change. But don't count on that happening even once the little one leaves.......as it didn't really change when buck left, did it? You and Tony are stuck in this new groove of behavior and neither of you can seem to break the pattern. One of you has to change behavior, you can't make him change, but you can change how to respond to his behavior to break the pattern.

    I hope you're able to get the frig, car, and purchases sorted out without too much stress.

    Post a bit more often though, I worry about you woman.

  5. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Just lots of hugs, sweetheart.
  6. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

    Gentle and understanding hugs to you, Janet.
  7. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sending you sincere wishes for peace, serenity, health and comfort............
  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thanks everyone. I promise to check in more often.

    Going to respond to Lisa and Sven.

    Sven, these things are items he buys when they go on clearance and he is allowed to buy them. I know without a doubt there are a ton of employee's doing the same thing because I see them on there...lol. Who else is going to post some really odd items that make no sense? LOL.

    Lisa, you are probably right but then again we got no break when Buck left because difficult child was already here. However the good news is that some agency is helping difficult child get a home and he has pretty much officially left as of today! The idiot did get a stupid puppy though while he was living in the camper in my yard and I have no idea if he is planning on taking it with him. I mean how stupid can one get when they cant even afford to take care of themselves? He claimed it was the girls dog. Monkey was like "I dont even like the puppy, he wont let me touch him!" LOL. Mouse wont know the difference. They have two dogs living at my house already. Mouse was here when my big dog Abby was born and they have grown up together. She actually crawls into her crate with her when she is in the house. That scared both Mandy and difficult child to death in the beginning because they were convinced she was going to bite her but Abby just shrinks back as far as she can in the crate and looks miserable...lmao.

    As far as me and Tony go from now forward, I would say try to find a therapist but he is so resistant to that ever since I was in therapy and he convinced himself my therapist hated him because of lies I told her. Or what he is convinced are lies. She doesnt hate him but she also doesnt approve of some of the things he says and does to me. I am thinking of attempting Alanon with him if I can get him to go but Im sure that will be pulling teeth.
  9. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    You always contribute a lot. If nothing else at certain times, your humor, which has GOT to be a lifesaver for you, gives me such a chuckle that it cheers me up, even if I'm sad that you're having a hard time :)
  10. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    I am so happy to hear difficult child is getting some help moving forward.

    I so hope Tony will go to a meeting with you.
    Hugs and love to you,
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thanks everyone. I am going to be just fine. I do hope that difficult child can get the help he needs from this place and that he will continue to go once I am not there to bug him into it. Im also hoping they can manage to get the Mouse into what is known as early head start so she can get out of the house while he is at his meetings. I firmly believe she would qualify because I can hardly understand a word she says. She will talk to me like she is having long conversations with me but it sounds like a foreign language...lol. Im also thinking she may have a slight hearing problem so she isnt hearing us clearly. Every time I ask her to do something she says "HUH" over and over again until I just ignore her and she goes away.