Hi, me and my husband have adopted 2 lovely boys from birth...both coming from good sosio-emotional backgrounds...My oldest is 7yr old almost turning 8...the youngest is 3 yr old. We are struggling with my oldest sons behavior....for a few years now. The last few weeks got really bad....we eventually took him to a child psychologist who diagnosed possible ODD with anxiety disorder...She's also thinking of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and few others, but says it's to early to see where this illness is going (must say, nut very reassuring for the parent!). He started with Risperdal, but got bad side-effects....Is on Tofranil 25mg -35mg now. It's so difficult for me and my husband to get to grips with this whole thing.....it's like we 'cant believe this is happening to us'...it's like looking from a distance what's happening to our family and don't know how to get a grip on things again. Our son is a very good looking smart boy that thankfully so far is doing well in school. The last few weeks his aggression and depressed moods got worse and worse. Last weekend he started pushing chairs around ect and this made me really afraid. Yesterday he woke up announsing that he doesn't want to go to school! I really didn't know how to handle the situation...he says he's feeling sick, but didn't look sick. Surely I couldn't force him to go, so made an appointment with dr...obviously he got more and more aggitated and at the end said that he isn't actually sick and doesn't want to go to dr. He wasn't allowed to play PS3....with all the fighting following. At the end of the day he realized how boaring it is staying at home and said he will go to school today. How do you handle this situation? I did EVERY thing wrong, I know! Told him that he will be institutionalized(if he dare to hurt me), not having a job, not going to school , everything that can be said wrong, I did!!!!I feel so guilty! Last night his father got so angry with him that he pulled him so hard aside thate he bruised my sons hand. My husband said that he wanted my son to realize that my husband is the strong one and will protect his family and lead the family (because my son says that he can do what ever he wants and that he is stronger than every one in the house)...I feel this is also my fault, because I always tried to undermine my husbands authority and choosing my sons side when he was little. My son cried so much, but later fell asleep. This caused so much tension between me and hubby! This morning my son was very obedient and calm.......but his spirit seems broken..... I really feel overwhelmed by al this! I just don't know what to do when I ask my son something (especialy in publick) and he just say know, I don't want to! How do we hide this from the family?