Hi I'm New Here

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by jmsali09, May 5, 2011.

  1. jmsali09

    jmsali09 New Member

    Hi I'm new here...It must be the place to be because when I saw that this was " a soft place to land for the battle weary parent" I was so happy because this sums things up for me. I'm from Minnesota, four kids...One just diagnosis with ADHD - Inattentive-and she is a "tween" on top of it ( 14 next monday) and my 9 year old is in the process of getting "official" diagnosis and help at U of M. I believe she has ADHD hyperactive/ ODD and anxiety...I'm so exhausted mentally and emotionally....We've had lots of transitions--lost our home, spouse out of work, me looking for work, etc etc...so, I'm glad to be here to learn and listen and share..thanks!
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    First - welcome! Not that any of us really want to be here... but yes, its a safe place to hang out - where other people actually understand.

    Thanks for doing up a signature... its part of how we help each other remember what we're dealing with!

    ADHD, transitions, stress, burnout... sounds familiar!

    Come on in, look around, ask questions, post responses...
  3. jmsali09

    jmsali09 New Member

    Thanks for the welcome! yes, I'm learning all these acronyms too! talk about stress! LoL! learning the lingo is half the battle!
  4. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Welcome. A book we value here that can help with the ODD side of things is 'The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. Look it up, read up on it, it requires a change in mindset but it can really help you find a better way to manage your child.

  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Hi and Welcome!!! You are in the right place. Others will be along iwth questions, etc...

    Marg mentioned a great book. I also recommend the Love and Logic books - they emphasize logical consequences used in a way to strengthen the parent-child bond. You can check their various books out at www.loveandlogic.com .

    I want to encourage you to start a Parent Report on each of your difficult children. It is a document that is used to keep ALL of the info on your child in ONE binder. Then you can give it to the various people who are supposed to be working with you. As you are organized you may have something similar already. This was worked out by Warrior Moms who were here a few years ago. The link in my signature will take you to the thread with the outline.

    As you go through evaluations on your kids, PLEASE include an evaluation by a private Occupational Therapist for sensory issues. Soemtiems the brain doesn't handle sensory input well. It can cause HUGE problems. It may be that tags or labels on clothes irritate, or a child likes a certain movement or texture or hates them. My kids all have some degree of sensory integration disorder but my youngest is the worst. For YEARS he had extra days off of school because he would get so overwhelmed by the sensory input at school. One year he missed a full 1/4 of the days of the year due to this. If we didn't keep him home he literally would spend 2-3 days shaking and vomiting from it (a very extreme reaction). The treatment is not invasive and makes a HUGE difference that can be seen immediately in some kids. It take work but usually is not unpleasant. There are some great books about it by Carol Kranowitz. The Out of Sync Child explains Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) and The Out of Sync Child Has Fun has activities that provide the various types of stimulation that help this kind of problem. The best thing about this, in my opinion, is that medication is NOT a major part of the treatment for this. I only know one child who is on medications for this and it is because she is so anxious about everything that they couldn't do the therapy with-o anxiety medications. The medications are mroe to treat anxiety than the Sensory Integration Disorder (SID). Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) treatment makes a HUGE change in how a child sees himself and feels about himself. At least it did for my kids.

    (((((hugs))))) and Welcome!!
  6. Jena

    Jena New Member

    welcome sorry you had to find us, yet glad you did!! your soo not alone...... others' will follow as well. great book they suggested you should grab.

    love the signature sanity is a learned behavior LOL. that made me laugh..... it's overwhelming in the beginning isnt it when you first get the diagnosis for your child? i know we all felt it, i think it goes through stages like anything else. yet you sound like your ontop of it. tell us more about your difficult child ........ sorry to hear things are so rough for you.

    hang in there!
  7. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    Hello and welcome. Good book suggestions you've been givn. The website that goes with Greene's work is www.livesinthebalance.org great little videos I wish I had seen before reading the books. I also love an old, but "sage" book called "TheDifficult Child" by a Tureki (spelling), it talks about the characteristics of kids and the "fit" of the parents. Doesn't talk about dxs. Love it and have many of my school parents read it.

    Wow you have been through so much as of late. I hope your basic needs are being cared for. How are you coping?
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Hi and welcome to the family :)

    Have you kids been evaluated by a neuropsychologist? Is that who you are seeing at the U. of M? My son actually was diagnosed by a neuropsychologist who was at Mayo Clinic for ten years. I live next door to you (Wisconsin).

    Nice to "meet" you, but so sorry you have to be here. Can you give us somes background info on your children? How was their infancy and toddler years? Any speech or motor skill delays? Can they make and keep friends? Any quirky behaviors or obsessions? Sensitivity to foods, materials, loud noise (covering ears)? Any psychiatric problems or substance abuse on either side of his genetic family tree?
  9. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Just popped in to say "hi" & welcome. I'm in your state (okay so I'm assuming MN)so if you need any references feel free to PM me.

    The tweedles were evaluated & diagnosis'd at the U of M as well.