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High School Discipline Drama - What Would You Do?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 386025" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>As I understand what you posted, JT experienced pretty much EXACTLY what he did to the other boy. It was done to him, and when JT reported it to the coach NOTHING happened to the bullies. So a year later JT is the older boy and does this to a younger boy. Younger boy does what JT did, reports it to the coach. NOW the coach acts, but seemingly only because the boy who was picked on was a teacher's child. Then, after the suspension, JT apologizes and goes so far as to apologize, all on his own, to the child's father - who is a teacher at his school.</p><p> </p><p>The father then pushes to have JT given a LOT more punishment. </p><p> </p><p>WHY did the coach not act when JT was hazed? The coach essentiall TAUGHT JT that this was acceptable - by doing nothing when JT was hazed and it was reported. </p><p></p><p>then they want JT to be accountable for anything that every other child in the school could do to the teacher's son? Where was this type of protection when YOUR son was hazed and reported it? Oh, wait, it didn't matter when JT reported it - no one got in any sort of trouble for THAT.</p><p> </p><p>I would NOT be happy here. The father who wants his son to beat up JT is acting VERY unprofessionally. I am SURE that the school rules say that ALL fighting is punished by suspensions. EVERY adult in this seems to be acting inappropriately. The principal has NO RIGHT to blame JT for the actions of others. The principal would have to be able to PROVE that JT forced someone else to hurt the boy for ANY punishment to be given, in my opinion. The father's reaction I could probably accept - as far as his words to your son. the extra punishments/threats are out of line.</p><p> </p><p>Look up the school rules. Make SURE that JT calls you IMMEDIATELY if he is called to the principal's or coach's office for ANY problem. Before he says ANYTHING to them you must be present. Before you get there he should say that he has been told to wait for you before he says ANYTHING. Then his mouth stays CLOSED until you get there to sort it out. ESP if it is over ANYTHING regarding the other boy. </p><p> </p><p>If the prinicpal imposes more punishment, take the first letter with you down to the Superintendent's office. Let them know that it is a shame that your son was hazing the other boy, and the suspension was appropriate, but nothing more. Also ask WHY no suspensions were given when similar things were done to your son the year before???</p><p> </p><p>The reason your son is to say absolutely NOTHING if he is called into the principal's office, or coach's office is because they have said they will call the police. JT has a right to representation if the police may be called. They made the threat and now JT needs to learn how to protect himself. Regardless of why he is called in, that threat of police action means that he needs you to be there when he gives ANY statement on ANYTHING. If the principal won't let him call you, or bullies him into saying anything before you get there, he should not be punished based on what he says with-o someone there to protect his rights. The principal has made it clear, crystal clear, that he will hold JT accountable for things he has no control over. This means that someone needs to be there to protect JT from the principal.</p><p> </p><p>Role play with JT what he should do if he is called into the office. What if they tell him he cannot call you? What if they badger him with questions, get into his face with them, etc.... Role play until he can politely say that he will answer questions as soon as his parents are there. Then how to use that ODD to his advantage and NOT respond to their questions.</p><p> </p><p>I am so sorry that when JT was hazed no one did anything, but then when he hazed a boy he got punished. The school essentially TAUGHT him that it was OKAY to haze someone, and then punished him for something he was taught to do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 386025, member: 1233"] As I understand what you posted, JT experienced pretty much EXACTLY what he did to the other boy. It was done to him, and when JT reported it to the coach NOTHING happened to the bullies. So a year later JT is the older boy and does this to a younger boy. Younger boy does what JT did, reports it to the coach. NOW the coach acts, but seemingly only because the boy who was picked on was a teacher's child. Then, after the suspension, JT apologizes and goes so far as to apologize, all on his own, to the child's father - who is a teacher at his school. The father then pushes to have JT given a LOT more punishment. WHY did the coach not act when JT was hazed? The coach essentiall TAUGHT JT that this was acceptable - by doing nothing when JT was hazed and it was reported. then they want JT to be accountable for anything that every other child in the school could do to the teacher's son? Where was this type of protection when YOUR son was hazed and reported it? Oh, wait, it didn't matter when JT reported it - no one got in any sort of trouble for THAT. I would NOT be happy here. The father who wants his son to beat up JT is acting VERY unprofessionally. I am SURE that the school rules say that ALL fighting is punished by suspensions. EVERY adult in this seems to be acting inappropriately. The principal has NO RIGHT to blame JT for the actions of others. The principal would have to be able to PROVE that JT forced someone else to hurt the boy for ANY punishment to be given, in my opinion. The father's reaction I could probably accept - as far as his words to your son. the extra punishments/threats are out of line. Look up the school rules. Make SURE that JT calls you IMMEDIATELY if he is called to the principal's or coach's office for ANY problem. Before he says ANYTHING to them you must be present. Before you get there he should say that he has been told to wait for you before he says ANYTHING. Then his mouth stays CLOSED until you get there to sort it out. ESP if it is over ANYTHING regarding the other boy. If the prinicpal imposes more punishment, take the first letter with you down to the Superintendent's office. Let them know that it is a shame that your son was hazing the other boy, and the suspension was appropriate, but nothing more. Also ask WHY no suspensions were given when similar things were done to your son the year before??? The reason your son is to say absolutely NOTHING if he is called into the principal's office, or coach's office is because they have said they will call the police. JT has a right to representation if the police may be called. They made the threat and now JT needs to learn how to protect himself. Regardless of why he is called in, that threat of police action means that he needs you to be there when he gives ANY statement on ANYTHING. If the principal won't let him call you, or bullies him into saying anything before you get there, he should not be punished based on what he says with-o someone there to protect his rights. The principal has made it clear, crystal clear, that he will hold JT accountable for things he has no control over. This means that someone needs to be there to protect JT from the principal. Role play with JT what he should do if he is called into the office. What if they tell him he cannot call you? What if they badger him with questions, get into his face with them, etc.... Role play until he can politely say that he will answer questions as soon as his parents are there. Then how to use that ODD to his advantage and NOT respond to their questions. I am so sorry that when JT was hazed no one did anything, but then when he hazed a boy he got punished. The school essentially TAUGHT him that it was OKAY to haze someone, and then punished him for something he was taught to do. [/QUOTE]
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