Hold me up and don't let me back down/out.

[C.J.]

Be prepared for the school district not to assist - happened in my case when a boy first started making harassing phone calls in the middle of the night. I approached the middle school they both attended at the time for assistance in contacting the boy's parents. They refused. I asked if they would make a phone call on my behalf or mail a letter which the school personnel would be able to read first - NO! When the incidents escalated to him following her into a girl's bathroom alone and then threatened to kill her in front of witnesses (school suspended him for a day for that - big deal). I had him served with "Protection from Stalking" papers AT THE SCHOOL. I had their attention then. She was escorted from class to class after that.

By the way this kid is now serving time in prison for sexual assault on another girl when he reached high school. He assaulted her on school grounds.

STAND YOUR GROUND! I'll be with you in spirit.

 

[DammitJanet]

Wow...I dont even know what to say. I am so shocked to hear/read this. I am so sad and enraged for your daughter. How can people be so cruel?

I hope you are able to get some kind of justice done.

 

[DazedandConfused]

Hi CJ,

I know the SD is powerless. I already went that route with the first incident. The girls retaliated. I did show the pics to the Principal after two of the girls started to physically threaten and even push her at school.

The principal was speechless when he saw the pics and the website. He did order the girls to stop and it did stop as far as threats at school. However, this particular incident involved three girls and the third girl was careful to not threaten at school. Now this third girl is the main instigator now along with one of the other two. Plus, one boy is involved in this. He's horrible!

He's the one with the mother who works at the same SD as me, but at another school. I took the pics,plus a horrible voice mail he sent and went to her house. When she saw and heard she didn't even blink an eye. Her response to me was, "Oh, I saw and told him they were inappropriate".

Inappropriate?! INAPPROPRIATE??!!

Yeah, ya think you numbskull! (geez, listen to me)

I would have broken my kid's computer to pieces had I seen something like that. Not this Mom. So, I am going to have her served right at the school she works and I'm going to have the Sheriffs department do it.

Thanks so much! Everyone!

You all are helping me keep a strong back. wow!

 

[ThreeShadows]

Very proud of you, go get'em! We're behind you. I don't understand these parents who won't look at their kids' behavior. There is such a thing as healthy shame and they don't want to look at what their progeny is doing to an other human being.

 

[KTMom91]

Stay strong! You're doing the right thing.

 

[Fran]

Your daughter will be relieved that you stepped in.

 

[DazedandConfused]

You know, she is. When this sort of thing first started happening, she begged me not to do anything. She said they would retaliate and they did. I figured if the parents knew, it would stop. It didn't. They did take a break, but then began to harass her at school. I was able to stop that, but now the internet stuff has started again.

I just don't get it. I just don't. Daughter is relieved, but skeptical that it will do any good. I have my apprehensions also, but at this point what other recourse is there? The police have pretty much told me that unless it is threats of physical violence, it is a civil matter.

So, at least I have some proof of the planning of this. I have requested the site be taken down, but it still has'n't yet. This is a HUGE problem with Myspace and I think they are overwhelmed with requests. They also put Daughter's age at 21 and I'm wondering if that is the reason for the delay.

I guess I have to threaten them with legal action. If it is not down by this weekend, that is what I am going to do.

 

[Big Bad Kitty]

Another one giving you support. Go mom!

 

[DammitJanet]

what are the laws for internet stalking? Hey...maybe check out Dr Phils site. I know he has done shows on this before and isnt he in your backyard?

He puts up information about past shows and how to handle things so maybe there is info there. I will go check later.

 

[Marguerite]

Isn't there some ways to find laws against using the telecommunications network to harass someone? Because the Internet still uses telephone networks, there may be something in those laws. That's how we go after them in Australia.

ANd if the nasty girls changed the MySpace page to show your daughter being 21, it sounds like they knew it would slow down the removal. I would be sending the MySpace people a copy of her birth certificate (or o ther prooff of age) and making it clear that they have planted some nasty loopholes.

Marg

 

[DazedandConfused]

I finally got a email telling me it is scheduled for removal.

Margarite,

That was my thinking too. Plus, people are much more likely to accept it on their friend's list if they don't show it as underage.

 

[DazedandConfused]

Yay! I just checked. It's gone. Still, they can make another one. It's fairly easy, actually. Her picture still comes up under the ID, though.

I hate MYSPACE!

 

[DammitJanet]

I just found this.

http://www.internetchildsafety.net/alternate.html

It also says to contact the ISP. They can take the posting down that way. Maybe more thorough?

 

[AnnieO]

Sometimes the right thing will give you nightmares but you know you're doing the right thing here.

Biomom got into difficult child's MySpace and sent all kinds of nasty stuff to me, husband, and husband's first ex and oldest son, all supposedly by difficult child. Unfortunately the type of writing precisely matched her emails and messages, and was nothing like difficult child's. MySpace wouldn't do anything about it. However difficult child changed her password and that was that. She said biomom didn't deserve her password any more. We don't have it, but there is a keylogger on that easy child in case we ever need it.

Keep in mind that protective orders don't stop people from doing things unless they're relatively law-abiding to begin with - however - when they're caught again (as they were this time), the consequences are pretty bad. Violating a PO is worse than harassing someone in the first place. Oh yeah - if you can get a PO against these children (that is what they are), it will affect the parents too. As in... If the parents have firearms, they must be given up ('cause they are accessible to the subject of the order)... And so on. been there done that when biomom got a bogus PO against husband a couple of years ago.

One last thing. HUGS for you. Because you have the nerve to do this for your child. YOU ARE AWESOME!

 

[DazedandConfused]

Sometimes the right thing will give you nightmares but you know you're doing the right thing here.


Keep in mind that protective orders don't stop people from doing things unless they're relatively law-abiding to begin with - however - when they're caught again (as they were this time), the consequences are pretty bad. Violating a PO is worse than harassing someone in the first place. Oh yeah - if you can get a PO against these children (that is what they are), it will affect the parents too.

Thanks for pointing this out. I am aware of it. All too aware of it, in fact. I know that getting caught violating the PO is where it is criminal. I just want all of it to stop.

As far as I know the parents "seem" to be law abiding. Like I wrote before, one works (not as a teacher) at the same SD as me. So does her husband. Though they do not work directly with students like I do. I have also met one of the girls parents. They were very apologetic, but really did nothing. I never tried to confront the other girl's parents. By the time I got to her, I was disullisioned with the whole parent thing. Plus, they then stepped it up and retaliated.

That was a really horrible time for Daughter. She thought they were her friends. She had hung out with them only a few days before having pizza and a good time.

Anyway, my first step is to file for the restraining orders. At the very least the parents will have to appear before a judge because of the actions of their children. I'm trying to keep my expectations realistic. Honestly, I'm afraid of more retaliation and it becoming more severe, but I have to take a stand. I don't think they realize what they are doing is against the law.

First step: file
Second step: serve
Third step: court.

I just want to get through the first step.

 

[susiestar]

Sending strength and support to help you through this. Cyber-bullying is so horrible. It is so easy to do, and so very public that it is even worse than in person bullying because more people can see it.

Gentle hugs to you and daughter. You will get through this.