Holy Cow!!! (The Explosive Child)

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Lillyth, Oct 1, 2008.

  1. Lillyth

    Lillyth New Member

    I just got my copy of The Explosive Child in the mail today and am 30 pages into it and I just have to say:

    Holy Cow!!!

    This is the second thing I have ever heard that makes ANY sense whatsoever about my child. (The first being his diagnosis of Asperger's).

    This book is awesome!!!

    I have always felt, albeit instinctively that trying to "show the child who is boss" was just wrong, wrong, wrong, but I have never been able to articulate why.

    I have always felt that if difficult child could control himself, he would.

    Now I am learning why he cannot & what to do about it.

    Thank you to everyone who recommended this book.

    It is the only thing I have read so far that even begins to explain what goes on with him & how to fix it.

    What a great, great book!
  2. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Yeah - it had that effect on me, too.

    Then I began to actually DO it - then it was "holy cow!" time all over again...

    Actually, I found difficult child 3's behaviour improving while I was still reading the book and before I had made any changes to how I disciplined (or so I thought).

    It doesn't work for everyone, unfortunately. But it certainly seems to help a great many.

  3. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member


    I'm glad you are making some connections. Once of the biggest things to help us get out of that fog of "I'm alone in this battle" is acknowledgement from others that they've been there and insight into our kids.

  4. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I remember feeling the same way after I read that book.

    Glad you took the member's advice to read that one. It is a good one.
  5. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Glad you like it! You'll have many more "holy cow!" moments as you read it, and as Marg said, as you put it into practice.
  6. house of cards

    house of cards New Member

    That book was the first place I saw someone write about my kid, it was amazing to feel that someone understood and really had my son down. I definately try to do the compromises and try to help difficult child see the choices he has, wish the school would get on board...I gave them a copy.
  7. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    One of the biggest ways it has helped us is by teaching my son that better answers really will be discussed and agreed upon, so instead of melting down or raging or doing something impulsive and bad, try hard to recognize a problem before-hand hand and tell someone. (We've tweaked the method a lot, as you can tell, but the concept is the same). Of course, this is a work in progress but it has already helped a lot.
  8. Pookybear66

    Pookybear66 New Member

    I was just going to post the same thing. It is incredible that this is what I've always felt(brain lockout + LFT) but was never able to develop a method to deal with it. When he writes about the conversations these people have and what is REALLY being said when the child screams, it is AMAZING!