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How Can He Ignore This
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 280769" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>WSM--</p><p> </p><p>You may be tired of hearing from me by now.....but I cannot even tell you how much you and your family have been on my mind and in my prayers lately. Part of this, of course, is the many similarities I have noticed in our situations.</p><p> </p><p>This morning, a couple thoughts jump out at me that I think are important--</p><p> </p><p>Marg-- I love your posts. I think you are very wise and have many good insights. Unfortunately, if you have ever tried installing survellience equipment in your home, it is pretty hard to conceal cameras and motion detectors in a home without the occupant noticing. It's probably different when you are trying to catch a nanny behavbing badly, because they are not familiar with your house.</p><p> </p><p>Second, trying to outsmart the motion detector is typical teen stuff. My son has a motion detector that was part of a "Spy Gear" set he received as a gift. He and his friends will play for hours trying to get past the detector. So the fact that your stepson wants to challenge the machine is not, in my opinion, a symptom of anything.</p><p> </p><p>The next thing that occurs to me as I have read the many descriptions of what has been happening in the home:</p><p> </p><p><em>Where has difficult child been getting the syrup?</em></p><p> </p><p>So many of us have our kitchens under lock and key....I cannot believe that any syrup would even be permitted in your homne at this point--much less freely available in the pantry.</p><p> </p><p>And when difficult child pours syrup all over the place--who cleans up that mess?</p><p> </p><p>I'll bet it's not difficult child--I'll bet it's YOU!!!</p><p> </p><p>This child may not be a sociopath as much as he is an ABUSER. He is ABUSING you by playing games that cause you extra work, cost you extra money, and make you look foolish in front of other people (including his father). And he is LOVING it.</p><p> </p><p>I will bet there are no consequences whatsoever for difficult child treating you like dirt....</p><p> </p><p>Perhaps the best thing to do is leave (not necessarily permanently)--but do not go back until your husband and his son can treat you with the respect you deserve. You are not the maid that cleans the messes, nor the servant that does all the hard work, nor the mule that carries all the burdens.</p><p> </p><p>I will bet that as soon as you leave, difficult child's freaky behaviors stop. After all, if he cannot get a rise out of you....what is the fun of pouring syrup around?</p><p> </p><p>Just something to think about....</p><p> </p><p>Please take care of yourself and your children.</p><p> </p><p>--DaisyF</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 280769, member: 6546"] WSM-- You may be tired of hearing from me by now.....but I cannot even tell you how much you and your family have been on my mind and in my prayers lately. Part of this, of course, is the many similarities I have noticed in our situations. This morning, a couple thoughts jump out at me that I think are important-- Marg-- I love your posts. I think you are very wise and have many good insights. Unfortunately, if you have ever tried installing survellience equipment in your home, it is pretty hard to conceal cameras and motion detectors in a home without the occupant noticing. It's probably different when you are trying to catch a nanny behavbing badly, because they are not familiar with your house. Second, trying to outsmart the motion detector is typical teen stuff. My son has a motion detector that was part of a "Spy Gear" set he received as a gift. He and his friends will play for hours trying to get past the detector. So the fact that your stepson wants to challenge the machine is not, in my opinion, a symptom of anything. The next thing that occurs to me as I have read the many descriptions of what has been happening in the home: [I]Where has difficult child been getting the syrup?[/I] So many of us have our kitchens under lock and key....I cannot believe that any syrup would even be permitted in your homne at this point--much less freely available in the pantry. And when difficult child pours syrup all over the place--who cleans up that mess? I'll bet it's not difficult child--I'll bet it's YOU!!! This child may not be a sociopath as much as he is an ABUSER. He is ABUSING you by playing games that cause you extra work, cost you extra money, and make you look foolish in front of other people (including his father). And he is LOVING it. I will bet there are no consequences whatsoever for difficult child treating you like dirt.... Perhaps the best thing to do is leave (not necessarily permanently)--but do not go back until your husband and his son can treat you with the respect you deserve. You are not the maid that cleans the messes, nor the servant that does all the hard work, nor the mule that carries all the burdens. I will bet that as soon as you leave, difficult child's freaky behaviors stop. After all, if he cannot get a rise out of you....what is the fun of pouring syrup around? Just something to think about.... Please take care of yourself and your children. --DaisyF [/QUOTE]
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