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General Parenting
How do we all survive this?
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 536330" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Good morning FHW. I cannot offer any advice about your children's issues, but I read your post with much empathy for the drama and trauma in your life. I have been down a few roads in my life, a life lived a tad longer then yours, so given what I've learned along the way, this is my answer to your question, "how do we survive this?" </p><p></p><p>Take <strong><u>exceptionally </u></strong>good care of yourself. Learn where your boundaries lie. Find out what you like and don't like and learn how to communicate that well. Be assertive not passive or aggressive. Learn to say no and mean it. If you aren't already get yourself into therapy and/or a parent group where you can listen to other parents and get heard and get advice. Find an exercise program that works for you and do it daily. Eat a very good diet and avoid sugar and perhaps dairy, gluten and any other allergens you think you may have problems with. Develop good support systems with woman. Try to laugh and have fun each day, laughter is healing. Discover what makes you happy and do it, and do it regularly. Find ways to relax...... massage, walks, dinners with friends, manicures, pedicures, whatever makes you breathe that big sigh of relief and offers a deep ability to let go. Make sure you have support all around you so you never feel alone. Sleep longer then you think you should, likely 8 hours, 7 in a pinch. Pick your battles, some things are just not worth fighting about or thinking about. Instead of reacting, respond, take a breath and then another, and then respond. Lean on whatever your spiritual path is so that you can surrender to a higher power of your choice and feel a connection to life. If it feels appropriate, pray and/or meditate. Acupuncture is a great stress reliever and method of healing. Redefine the meaning of selfish so that it means to serve the self first, so you can serve others better. </p><p></p><p>Woman are programmed to nurture, to give. However, often we don't turn that nurturing and giving on ourselves. In such trying circumstances, we require a balance in our giving <u><strong>and </strong></u>receiving, that balance will give you the support you need to get through all that is on your plate. I have had to learn this lesson over and over until I really got it. Self care, self love and self acceptance will give you all the tools you need to make the best choices and to be able to love without resentment and depletion. I also thrive in peace and tranquility as you do and the way I have found that, given what has surrounded me and still surrounds me, is to make sure I am very well taken care of.</p><p></p><p>You have a lot to deal with. I wish you that peace you desire. I send you and your family hugs and prayers for tranquility and calm.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 536330, member: 13542"] Good morning FHW. I cannot offer any advice about your children's issues, but I read your post with much empathy for the drama and trauma in your life. I have been down a few roads in my life, a life lived a tad longer then yours, so given what I've learned along the way, this is my answer to your question, "how do we survive this?" Take [B][U]exceptionally [/U][/B]good care of yourself. Learn where your boundaries lie. Find out what you like and don't like and learn how to communicate that well. Be assertive not passive or aggressive. Learn to say no and mean it. If you aren't already get yourself into therapy and/or a parent group where you can listen to other parents and get heard and get advice. Find an exercise program that works for you and do it daily. Eat a very good diet and avoid sugar and perhaps dairy, gluten and any other allergens you think you may have problems with. Develop good support systems with woman. Try to laugh and have fun each day, laughter is healing. Discover what makes you happy and do it, and do it regularly. Find ways to relax...... massage, walks, dinners with friends, manicures, pedicures, whatever makes you breathe that big sigh of relief and offers a deep ability to let go. Make sure you have support all around you so you never feel alone. Sleep longer then you think you should, likely 8 hours, 7 in a pinch. Pick your battles, some things are just not worth fighting about or thinking about. Instead of reacting, respond, take a breath and then another, and then respond. Lean on whatever your spiritual path is so that you can surrender to a higher power of your choice and feel a connection to life. If it feels appropriate, pray and/or meditate. Acupuncture is a great stress reliever and method of healing. Redefine the meaning of selfish so that it means to serve the self first, so you can serve others better. Woman are programmed to nurture, to give. However, often we don't turn that nurturing and giving on ourselves. In such trying circumstances, we require a balance in our giving [U][B]and [/B][/U]receiving, that balance will give you the support you need to get through all that is on your plate. I have had to learn this lesson over and over until I really got it. Self care, self love and self acceptance will give you all the tools you need to make the best choices and to be able to love without resentment and depletion. I also thrive in peace and tranquility as you do and the way I have found that, given what has surrounded me and still surrounds me, is to make sure I am very well taken care of. You have a lot to deal with. I wish you that peace you desire. I send you and your family hugs and prayers for tranquility and calm. [/QUOTE]
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