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How do you cope when your child chooses to be homeless?
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<blockquote data-quote="nlj" data-source="post: 630587" data-attributes="member: 17650"><p>Hello Tired</p><p></p><p>My son is homeless in the UK through choice. He's currently living in a squat (a derelict abandoned farmhouse with no running water, electricity or sanitation) with like-minded people, although he finds it difficult often to be around other people and has recently moved into a treehouse that he has built himself a little way away from the main camp. I suffered terribly with grief for his lifestyle for quite a while, but I have now accepted it. He tells me he is happy. Echo who posts on this site will tell you that her son said the same thing. My son says that he is 'free', he doesn't have to work for anyone else, doesn't have bills to pay or worry about making rent and doesn't have to live within the constraints of accepted norms. He makes do from day to day with no money, he scavenges for food, and looks and smells like a tramp.</p><p></p><p>It's an extreme lifestyle choice, but it is <u>his choice</u>.</p><p></p><p>It's not what I would choose for him and I could never live like that, but I'm not him. There are things about living within conformed society that are not great aren't there? but we go along and try and do the best we can and raise our children to be 'good citizens'. As parents we tend to think that our children should get a job, live in a house, get married, have a couple of children, pay taxes, save for a pension. </p><p></p><p>My son has rebelled against this. He has extreme views about the corruption and evil and hypocrisy in society. I used to cringe at his views, but actually there is some truth in a lot of his rants.</p><p></p><p>I've just accepted him for who he is. This has allowed me to find happiness and optimism again and to just love him unconditionally. I am actually able to find humour in our situation quite a lot of the time now.</p><p></p><p>Embrace your son for who he is and let him get on with it (as your mother says). I am always here for my son if he wants a bed for the night or a shower or a washing machine for his rags, you can be too. I used to think he would die living like this, but he hasn't died, in fact he often seems to be thriving on it. </p><p></p><p>Now that I'm no longer trying to change him or 'fix' him, I can get on with enjoying my own life. </p><p></p><p>I hope you can find a way to do the same.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nlj, post: 630587, member: 17650"] Hello Tired My son is homeless in the UK through choice. He's currently living in a squat (a derelict abandoned farmhouse with no running water, electricity or sanitation) with like-minded people, although he finds it difficult often to be around other people and has recently moved into a treehouse that he has built himself a little way away from the main camp. I suffered terribly with grief for his lifestyle for quite a while, but I have now accepted it. He tells me he is happy. Echo who posts on this site will tell you that her son said the same thing. My son says that he is 'free', he doesn't have to work for anyone else, doesn't have bills to pay or worry about making rent and doesn't have to live within the constraints of accepted norms. He makes do from day to day with no money, he scavenges for food, and looks and smells like a tramp. It's an extreme lifestyle choice, but it is [U]his choice[/U]. It's not what I would choose for him and I could never live like that, but I'm not him. There are things about living within conformed society that are not great aren't there? but we go along and try and do the best we can and raise our children to be 'good citizens'. As parents we tend to think that our children should get a job, live in a house, get married, have a couple of children, pay taxes, save for a pension. My son has rebelled against this. He has extreme views about the corruption and evil and hypocrisy in society. I used to cringe at his views, but actually there is some truth in a lot of his rants. I've just accepted him for who he is. This has allowed me to find happiness and optimism again and to just love him unconditionally. I am actually able to find humour in our situation quite a lot of the time now. Embrace your son for who he is and let him get on with it (as your mother says). I am always here for my son if he wants a bed for the night or a shower or a washing machine for his rags, you can be too. I used to think he would die living like this, but he hasn't died, in fact he often seems to be thriving on it. Now that I'm no longer trying to change him or 'fix' him, I can get on with enjoying my own life. I hope you can find a way to do the same. [/QUOTE]
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