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How do you deal with an ex who won't leave you alone?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 558881" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Star and Janet and everyone, thank you for answering. He has no money for a lawyer or therapist. And I'm not sure why he doesn't, but he says he doesn't. You know what? There is nothing I can do to help. We barely make it paycheck to paycheck as it is and have nothing extra (Sonic and Jumper are still living at home). The dynamics just changed...ex is engaged to man who cheated with her and is pregnant and she IS going to go for custody. Chances are good that she will succeed, at least by the time Grandson is in kindergarten, to getting more custody so that my son will only see his son every other weekend and Wednesday nights. There is nothing on earth I can do about it. I feel terrible for him, but all I can offer is empathy. He refuses to join a divorce support group in his area because all of them are religious and he is agnostic (I think this is very foolish of him because support is support). So I am his entire support group and I can't do it anymore. I get off the phone with him, and he can yell and be abusive, and I am shaking. He says that if he loses his son, and in his mind minimal custody is losing son, he will kill himself. I don't want to hear it. There is nothing I can do for him. If he threatens to actually kill himself while talking to me, I can call 911, but that's it and will only make him angry (but, tough). </p><p></p><p>Having decided to limit my time listening to him, because I am unable to help anyway, I do want to spout off about how unfair the system is to fathers. When I went through a divorce, I was really glad that the system was so biased toward women, but now I see how the system screws with the fathers, even good ones who do pay child support and do all they can for their children. But, hey, can't do anything about THAT either, can I?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 558881, member: 1550"] Star and Janet and everyone, thank you for answering. He has no money for a lawyer or therapist. And I'm not sure why he doesn't, but he says he doesn't. You know what? There is nothing I can do to help. We barely make it paycheck to paycheck as it is and have nothing extra (Sonic and Jumper are still living at home). The dynamics just changed...ex is engaged to man who cheated with her and is pregnant and she IS going to go for custody. Chances are good that she will succeed, at least by the time Grandson is in kindergarten, to getting more custody so that my son will only see his son every other weekend and Wednesday nights. There is nothing on earth I can do about it. I feel terrible for him, but all I can offer is empathy. He refuses to join a divorce support group in his area because all of them are religious and he is agnostic (I think this is very foolish of him because support is support). So I am his entire support group and I can't do it anymore. I get off the phone with him, and he can yell and be abusive, and I am shaking. He says that if he loses his son, and in his mind minimal custody is losing son, he will kill himself. I don't want to hear it. There is nothing I can do for him. If he threatens to actually kill himself while talking to me, I can call 911, but that's it and will only make him angry (but, tough). Having decided to limit my time listening to him, because I am unable to help anyway, I do want to spout off about how unfair the system is to fathers. When I went through a divorce, I was really glad that the system was so biased toward women, but now I see how the system screws with the fathers, even good ones who do pay child support and do all they can for their children. But, hey, can't do anything about THAT either, can I? [/QUOTE]
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