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General Parenting
How do you deal with your difficult child's insults, etc?
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<blockquote data-quote="mazdamama" data-source="post: 493739" data-attributes="member: 12227"><p>Malika.....my other boy is 11 and has had anger issues since about the age of 3. Children's minds soak up everything they see and hear from the time they are born. My boys are both adopted and are biological brothers. They were born to my son and his now late ex wife. She was adopted at 2 1/2 yrs old. My son married this girl before we had even met her but shortly after meeting her I realized there were problems with her. When she and my son moved from TN to FL to live with us they had been divorced for 12 wks and remarried because even with her 10 wk old son she was again pregnant. Things got worse as time went on. She attempted suicide while pregnant with David causing problems with his and he was a preemie. Daniel, she tried to drown. After we found her biological mother we found out that her father's family ALL had mental health problems. Bio Mom was diagnosis'd with Borderline Persoanlity Disorder and set herself on fire 2 yrs ago and suffered for almost 3 months before her death.</p><p></p><p>What I am trying to say here is that Daniel started with the anger at age 3 and as the years went by it got worse and he got bigger and then medication after medication was used. The one that put him over was Haldol....it had him hearing voices. He was threatening people and managed to kill two small dogs he had without meaning to. His anger came to a point where the school did not really want him there, I could not really punish him in any way although he got great consequences for good behavior. I have a torn ligament in my knee from him pushing me down and trying to choke me. He became too dangerous for David and I to be safe around him although he did not want to be like that. The tears, the feeling bad about things he did but unable to control the things was a cry for help. I did not wait too long, I think he can be healed and get the things that bother him out of his mind and deal with them. My late husband, my son (Daniel's dad) and my late father in law ALL had anger issues. Daniel inherited not only the anger, the mental illness genes but also high cholestrol.</p><p></p><p>I do not know your story well enough to know if you know the history of the bio parents of your son but I can tell you that genetics can and do have alot to do with how adopted children behave. As a grandparent that adopted I was lucky enough to be able to find out medical and mental histories.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mazdamama, post: 493739, member: 12227"] Malika.....my other boy is 11 and has had anger issues since about the age of 3. Children's minds soak up everything they see and hear from the time they are born. My boys are both adopted and are biological brothers. They were born to my son and his now late ex wife. She was adopted at 2 1/2 yrs old. My son married this girl before we had even met her but shortly after meeting her I realized there were problems with her. When she and my son moved from TN to FL to live with us they had been divorced for 12 wks and remarried because even with her 10 wk old son she was again pregnant. Things got worse as time went on. She attempted suicide while pregnant with David causing problems with his and he was a preemie. Daniel, she tried to drown. After we found her biological mother we found out that her father's family ALL had mental health problems. Bio Mom was diagnosis'd with Borderline Persoanlity Disorder and set herself on fire 2 yrs ago and suffered for almost 3 months before her death. What I am trying to say here is that Daniel started with the anger at age 3 and as the years went by it got worse and he got bigger and then medication after medication was used. The one that put him over was Haldol....it had him hearing voices. He was threatening people and managed to kill two small dogs he had without meaning to. His anger came to a point where the school did not really want him there, I could not really punish him in any way although he got great consequences for good behavior. I have a torn ligament in my knee from him pushing me down and trying to choke me. He became too dangerous for David and I to be safe around him although he did not want to be like that. The tears, the feeling bad about things he did but unable to control the things was a cry for help. I did not wait too long, I think he can be healed and get the things that bother him out of his mind and deal with them. My late husband, my son (Daniel's dad) and my late father in law ALL had anger issues. Daniel inherited not only the anger, the mental illness genes but also high cholestrol. I do not know your story well enough to know if you know the history of the bio parents of your son but I can tell you that genetics can and do have alot to do with how adopted children behave. As a grandparent that adopted I was lucky enough to be able to find out medical and mental histories. [/QUOTE]
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