Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How do you regain a fresh perspective with difficult child?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="JJJ" data-source="post: 369603" data-attributes="member: 1169"><p>I'm standing here too. I've had to detach so much as Kanga's "mom" and act more like a caseworker, both to keep treatment teams on track and for my own mental health. I do not (and maybe never did???) feel like her mother. It is not an adoption thing -- I love my other three completely and I am definitely their mother in my heart, their hearts and in our daily lives. Her stay in our home was so brief and she's been in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) over two years and is likely to age out to adult living. </p><p></p><p>As someone said, if an adult had treated my younger children and I the way she did, there would have been restraining orders and criminal charges. (Actually, had she not gotten into Residential Treatment Center (RTC), our local police were prepared to charge her to try and get us help through the juvy system - so glad we didn't have to go there.) Logically, it doesn't surprise me that I don't have very maternal feelings toward her - or really any positive emotions. It is just sad. </p><p></p><p>This is a hard place to be - both detached and uncomfortable about being detached. I'm trying not to stress about it as I figured it will resolve itself over time. As an adult, it is quite possible that she will be gone in the wind with some boy and we will not have a relationship at all. Last therapist gave it even odds between that and sticking around just a little, but no one who really gets to know her sees her able to be a true member of a family.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JJJ, post: 369603, member: 1169"] I'm standing here too. I've had to detach so much as Kanga's "mom" and act more like a caseworker, both to keep treatment teams on track and for my own mental health. I do not (and maybe never did???) feel like her mother. It is not an adoption thing -- I love my other three completely and I am definitely their mother in my heart, their hearts and in our daily lives. Her stay in our home was so brief and she's been in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) over two years and is likely to age out to adult living. As someone said, if an adult had treated my younger children and I the way she did, there would have been restraining orders and criminal charges. (Actually, had she not gotten into Residential Treatment Center (RTC), our local police were prepared to charge her to try and get us help through the juvy system - so glad we didn't have to go there.) Logically, it doesn't surprise me that I don't have very maternal feelings toward her - or really any positive emotions. It is just sad. This is a hard place to be - both detached and uncomfortable about being detached. I'm trying not to stress about it as I figured it will resolve itself over time. As an adult, it is quite possible that she will be gone in the wind with some boy and we will not have a relationship at all. Last therapist gave it even odds between that and sticking around just a little, but no one who really gets to know her sees her able to be a true member of a family. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How do you regain a fresh perspective with difficult child?
Top