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How has parenting a difficult child changed you?
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<blockquote data-quote="Wiped Out" data-source="post: 562493" data-attributes="member: 1631"><p>Interesting question and I'm not sure I know all of the ways it has/is changed/changing me.</p><p></p><p>I believe it has made me a much better teacher. I have much more compassion and can relate well to so many of my parents including those with difficult children. I'm rather open and think letting other parents know I also have a child who is a difficult child really helps them feel more comfortable around me. When I hear other teachers wondering about the parents of a difficult child I'm the first to point out it is not always due to parents!</p><p></p><p>I've learned that love can't change everything (but still means a lot). </p><p></p><p>I've learned how it is possible to love your child but not like them all the time as well as being surprised at how much I can love him despite everything (violence, verbal abuse, etc...).</p><p></p><p>I've learned how to compartmentalize my life to a bit. When I'm at work teaching I just don't have time to be dwelling on my difficult child. This has been a huge benefit for me because in some ways it lets me "escape" for awhile. </p><p></p><p>In addition, I've learned the importance of taking care of me. Both husband and I carve out time to workout together and also time to spend together and alone. It isn't nearly much time as we need but it helps. </p><p></p><p>I have learned that there are some teachers that have been amazing with my difficult child and that there are some who should not be teaching difficult children.</p><p></p><p>I've learned to appreciate little things much more than I ever did. I appreciate everyone of difficult child's baby steps. I get so excited over things I didn't think would matter so much.</p><p></p><p>I believe I'm a stronger more resilient person because of my difficult child. </p><p></p><p>I tire much more easily. I'm battle weary. I have learned parenting is not what I expected. </p><p></p><p>I was always a very trusting person and now question things more. </p><p></p><p>I've learned to not take things so personally (still working on this one).</p><p></p><p>I know there other things that have changed about me and believe I am still changing.</p><p></p><p>One thing I'm very happy about is, for the most part, I have retained my sense of humor and my positive attitude (some days more than others).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Wiped Out, post: 562493, member: 1631"] Interesting question and I'm not sure I know all of the ways it has/is changed/changing me. I believe it has made me a much better teacher. I have much more compassion and can relate well to so many of my parents including those with difficult children. I'm rather open and think letting other parents know I also have a child who is a difficult child really helps them feel more comfortable around me. When I hear other teachers wondering about the parents of a difficult child I'm the first to point out it is not always due to parents! I've learned that love can't change everything (but still means a lot). I've learned how it is possible to love your child but not like them all the time as well as being surprised at how much I can love him despite everything (violence, verbal abuse, etc...). I've learned how to compartmentalize my life to a bit. When I'm at work teaching I just don't have time to be dwelling on my difficult child. This has been a huge benefit for me because in some ways it lets me "escape" for awhile. In addition, I've learned the importance of taking care of me. Both husband and I carve out time to workout together and also time to spend together and alone. It isn't nearly much time as we need but it helps. I have learned that there are some teachers that have been amazing with my difficult child and that there are some who should not be teaching difficult children. I've learned to appreciate little things much more than I ever did. I appreciate everyone of difficult child's baby steps. I get so excited over things I didn't think would matter so much. I believe I'm a stronger more resilient person because of my difficult child. I tire much more easily. I'm battle weary. I have learned parenting is not what I expected. I was always a very trusting person and now question things more. I've learned to not take things so personally (still working on this one). I know there other things that have changed about me and believe I am still changing. One thing I'm very happy about is, for the most part, I have retained my sense of humor and my positive attitude (some days more than others). [/QUOTE]
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