Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How Much is Too Much Oversight?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 138943" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Being greeted at the door with what he has done wrong and punishments is terribly damaging to a child. Esp if it is everyday. Right after school he should have time to unwind and then do homework. What your wife is doing will only make the problem WORSE. It won't help because it is tearing his self-esteem to shreds. Would your wife like it if YOU met HER at the door with a litany of every little mistake she has made? Maybe if you ask her how SHE would feel, she could see how damaging this is to a child.</p><p> </p><p>If there is something very serious, then it should be talked about after he has some time to unwind. School is very very hard for our kids. They work to keep their act together (with mixed success) but if all they hear is how bad they are, they won't keep trying. Heck, I wouldn't keep trying if I was met every day with what I did wrong.</p><p> </p><p>One exercise I learned in a group for parents of ADHD kids was to have 3 positives for every negative. After the behavior is turned around, you can let up, but the negative things you say should always be outnumbered by the positive things you say.</p><p> </p><p>You might ask your wife how she would react if her boss behaved the way she is. As parents, we are the bosses of the family. It is worth the effort to work to be a GOOD boss, with good communication skills. Often in a family we forget that, esp when our kids are driving us crazy.</p><p> </p><p>Hugs,</p><p> </p><p>Susie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 138943, member: 1233"] Being greeted at the door with what he has done wrong and punishments is terribly damaging to a child. Esp if it is everyday. Right after school he should have time to unwind and then do homework. What your wife is doing will only make the problem WORSE. It won't help because it is tearing his self-esteem to shreds. Would your wife like it if YOU met HER at the door with a litany of every little mistake she has made? Maybe if you ask her how SHE would feel, she could see how damaging this is to a child. If there is something very serious, then it should be talked about after he has some time to unwind. School is very very hard for our kids. They work to keep their act together (with mixed success) but if all they hear is how bad they are, they won't keep trying. Heck, I wouldn't keep trying if I was met every day with what I did wrong. One exercise I learned in a group for parents of ADHD kids was to have 3 positives for every negative. After the behavior is turned around, you can let up, but the negative things you say should always be outnumbered by the positive things you say. You might ask your wife how she would react if her boss behaved the way she is. As parents, we are the bosses of the family. It is worth the effort to work to be a GOOD boss, with good communication skills. Often in a family we forget that, esp when our kids are driving us crazy. Hugs, Susie [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How Much is Too Much Oversight?
Top