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How to recover ourselves after difficult child-induced trauma?
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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 596892" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>It applies, Recovering.</p><p></p><p>Thank you.</p><p></p><p>There are so many images of shame, or of shock and horror, in my recent postings. (Quasimodo, Apocalypse Now) Interestingly enough, we have returned to the area where my family (including my mother) live, for the summer. husband and I have been tearing each other apart over how to deal with my mother, and with my family, here. He says he is done. I feel a responsibility. Interacting with her, even now, has needle-sharp teeth.</p><p></p><p>And of course, we are very near the city where difficult child continues to be homeless.</p><p></p><p>I am going to have to stand up.</p><p></p><p>It's like swimming in a pit of vipers. My sister (who will be here in June) believes difficult child is demon-possessed, and is busy praying fences of protection around her. (And telling me that, if she removes them because I've chosen to help difficult child in a way she disapproves of, the safest place for me to be will be on my knees. This is the same sister who, years ago, prayed (with a group of people from her church) a thorny fence of badness, a focused wishing of bad things to happen to me, and to my family, to bring me "to the Lord".) </p><p></p><p>Which reminds me of a quote: "We must somehow work out our salvation in the midst of the nuclear arms race and surrounded by our Bingo-crazy relations."</p><p>Ross ~ On Strike Against God</p><p></p><p>Cheesh. Sometimes? It wonder whether difficult child isn't the sanest one of the bunch. </p><p></p><p>I remember blackgnat posting about feeling emotionally "thin" from coping with the day to day horror of what is happening with our difficult child children.</p><p></p><p>Hmmmm.....</p><p></p><p>I am going to explore this issue. I thought I had resolved all this through therapy.</p><p></p><p>This is what I am reading, today: <a href="http://www.strugglinghero.com/healing-toxic-shame-how-do-i-get-rid-of-it-part-one/" target="_blank">http://www.strugglinghero.com/healing-toxic-shame-how-do-i-get-rid-of-it-part-one/</a></p><p></p><p>Recommended reading: Healing the Shame That Binds You ~ John Bradshaw</p><p></p><p>Also, reviewed Joel Osteen's "In a Time of Trouble." </p><p></p><p>I will post an address for him, later. I did that this morning and did not write that site address down.</p><p></p><p>Just in case any of the others of us are working through similar issues? I will report back on what I find helpful.</p><p></p><p>I am gong to put this information on Facebook for difficult child, too. I read this morning that some therapists believe toxic shame is the root cause of many emotional illnesses. </p><p></p><p>Oh, brother.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 596892, member: 1721"] It applies, Recovering. Thank you. There are so many images of shame, or of shock and horror, in my recent postings. (Quasimodo, Apocalypse Now) Interestingly enough, we have returned to the area where my family (including my mother) live, for the summer. husband and I have been tearing each other apart over how to deal with my mother, and with my family, here. He says he is done. I feel a responsibility. Interacting with her, even now, has needle-sharp teeth. And of course, we are very near the city where difficult child continues to be homeless. I am going to have to stand up. It's like swimming in a pit of vipers. My sister (who will be here in June) believes difficult child is demon-possessed, and is busy praying fences of protection around her. (And telling me that, if she removes them because I've chosen to help difficult child in a way she disapproves of, the safest place for me to be will be on my knees. This is the same sister who, years ago, prayed (with a group of people from her church) a thorny fence of badness, a focused wishing of bad things to happen to me, and to my family, to bring me "to the Lord".) Which reminds me of a quote: "We must somehow work out our salvation in the midst of the nuclear arms race and surrounded by our Bingo-crazy relations." Ross ~ On Strike Against God Cheesh. Sometimes? It wonder whether difficult child isn't the sanest one of the bunch. I remember blackgnat posting about feeling emotionally "thin" from coping with the day to day horror of what is happening with our difficult child children. Hmmmm..... I am going to explore this issue. I thought I had resolved all this through therapy. This is what I am reading, today: [url]http://www.strugglinghero.com/healing-toxic-shame-how-do-i-get-rid-of-it-part-one/[/url] Recommended reading: Healing the Shame That Binds You ~ John Bradshaw Also, reviewed Joel Osteen's "In a Time of Trouble." I will post an address for him, later. I did that this morning and did not write that site address down. Just in case any of the others of us are working through similar issues? I will report back on what I find helpful. I am gong to put this information on Facebook for difficult child, too. I read this morning that some therapists believe toxic shame is the root cause of many emotional illnesses. Oh, brother. Barbara [/QUOTE]
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