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Parent Emeritus
How to recover ourselves after difficult child-induced trauma?
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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 597085" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>You're welcome, WTWE. I will be really, really happy if anything I discovered makes a difference for someone else, too. </p><p></p><p>So, this is what I've learned:</p><p></p><p>Joel Osteen videos address and change old, shaming messages through positive affirmation. </p><p></p><p>I will post a site to free podcasts of his sermons. </p><p></p><p>An advance warning: Joel Osteen is a Christian televangelist. Not so long ago, my response to anyone recommending anything to do with a Christian televangelist would have been disgust, and some eye-rolling comment about fanaticism. Listening to one of these sermons however, is like listening to the best psychotherapist, the best life coach, you ever went to. The site I am including is free, of course.</p><p></p><p><a href="http://castroller.com/podcasts/joelosteenvideo?page=2" target="_blank">http://castroller.com/podcasts/joelosteenvideo?page=2</a></p><p></p><p>The site on Healing Toxic Shame was excellent. It turns out to be the blog of a woman who used the Bradshaw book (Healing the Shame That Binds You) to work through her own issues with toxic shame. Very time-consuming to do it this way. A variety of excellent tools and techniques for envisioning, addressing, and replacing shaming imagery are included. </p><p></p><p>It took me two and a half days to review the site and all the linkages. What I am going to do is print it all out so that I have it ready for when I want to do shame work. I tried a number of the techniques. They are simple, and effective. </p><p></p><p>Another site, linked from the Healing the Shame site: Break the Cycle <a href="http://sfhelp.org/gwc/false_self.htm" target="_blank">http://sfhelp.org/gwc/false_self.htm</a></p><p></p><p>This site (also free) is one male therapist, leading the viewer through meditations on acknowledging and incorporating false, or guardian, selves.</p><p></p><p>Also very good, but also, very time consuming.</p><p></p><p>So, that is what I learned. Also, that there are definitely areas where I still have work to do, ferreting out and healing, the hurt parts.</p><p></p><p>All in all, a very good thing to have done.</p><p></p><p>Here is a really crummy thing I discovered during one of the exercises: I have the entire cast of the movie "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane" rattling around in here. </p><p></p><p>Good news is that Katherine Hepburn appears frequently.</p><p></p><p>:O)</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 597085, member: 1721"] You're welcome, WTWE. I will be really, really happy if anything I discovered makes a difference for someone else, too. So, this is what I've learned: Joel Osteen videos address and change old, shaming messages through positive affirmation. I will post a site to free podcasts of his sermons. An advance warning: Joel Osteen is a Christian televangelist. Not so long ago, my response to anyone recommending anything to do with a Christian televangelist would have been disgust, and some eye-rolling comment about fanaticism. Listening to one of these sermons however, is like listening to the best psychotherapist, the best life coach, you ever went to. The site I am including is free, of course. [url]http://castroller.com/podcasts/joelosteenvideo?page=2[/url] The site on Healing Toxic Shame was excellent. It turns out to be the blog of a woman who used the Bradshaw book (Healing the Shame That Binds You) to work through her own issues with toxic shame. Very time-consuming to do it this way. A variety of excellent tools and techniques for envisioning, addressing, and replacing shaming imagery are included. It took me two and a half days to review the site and all the linkages. What I am going to do is print it all out so that I have it ready for when I want to do shame work. I tried a number of the techniques. They are simple, and effective. Another site, linked from the Healing the Shame site: Break the Cycle [url]http://sfhelp.org/gwc/false_self.htm[/url] This site (also free) is one male therapist, leading the viewer through meditations on acknowledging and incorporating false, or guardian, selves. Also very good, but also, very time consuming. So, that is what I learned. Also, that there are definitely areas where I still have work to do, ferreting out and healing, the hurt parts. All in all, a very good thing to have done. Here is a really crummy thing I discovered during one of the exercises: I have the entire cast of the movie "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane" rattling around in here. Good news is that Katherine Hepburn appears frequently. :O) Barbara [/QUOTE]
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