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how to stop worrying...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 284617" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> I'm a horrible realist...lol. I think the best sign of a child wanting to change is when he makes positive changes. If the child doesn't change his friends, he is still rooted in the drug culture. There is no way for an addict to quit and be around drug addicts. Your son is young, like my daughter was, when she got fed up. One day she saw a "friend" of hers with track marks up and down her arms and thought, "That will be me one day." It was the beginning of her journey toward quitting. She did not want to be that person. Also, she had other positives going for her, like your son does. My daughter was bright and had actually gone to Comsmetology School while being high--she had ambition in spite of the drugs. She also worked from age 16 on up. She got no money from us unless she did, and she was a good worker. She short of "lost it" from ages 12-19. As soon as she was shown the door, and moved in with her straight-arrow brother in another state, she really changed for the better. She had to walk to work--she had no car or license or way to buy insurance anymore--but she did it! And now she's sooooooo anti-drug. She won't even take aspirins and likes herbal remedies. She still drinks sometimes, but only at appropriate times and will never drink and drive. She has a boyfriend now for seven years and they just bought a house. I do think that if they are going to seriously quit and yearn for a better life, it is usually when they get to be around 19-21 or else it's harder and usually a much longer trek. At times it CAN be forever (there's my realism again). I think your son is one of those kids who just needs your support and praise and expect him to slip a few times. But since he's trying, I'd give him some leeway unless you see him going WAY back to where he was. Bad signs would be if you see him hanging with his old "friends" again.</p><p></p><p>Some kids go through a drug phase and get over it. I so wish you all the luck in the world with your boy. I love a success story, believe me <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" />. You ARE going to worry about him though. I still worry about my daughter. I think right now, set him up for success. Don't put too much on him, like leaving him alone at home where his "friends" may find out he's alone and insist he let them in to party...you know how bad these "friends" are. Misery LOVES company. Druggies stick together and don't want to lose anyone. I was shocked and horrified at how they'd push my daughter to use! </p><p></p><p>Please update us. And, remember, he's not going to be perfect, but he's on the right track <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 284617, member: 1550"] Hi :) I'm a horrible realist...lol. I think the best sign of a child wanting to change is when he makes positive changes. If the child doesn't change his friends, he is still rooted in the drug culture. There is no way for an addict to quit and be around drug addicts. Your son is young, like my daughter was, when she got fed up. One day she saw a "friend" of hers with track marks up and down her arms and thought, "That will be me one day." It was the beginning of her journey toward quitting. She did not want to be that person. Also, she had other positives going for her, like your son does. My daughter was bright and had actually gone to Comsmetology School while being high--she had ambition in spite of the drugs. She also worked from age 16 on up. She got no money from us unless she did, and she was a good worker. She short of "lost it" from ages 12-19. As soon as she was shown the door, and moved in with her straight-arrow brother in another state, she really changed for the better. She had to walk to work--she had no car or license or way to buy insurance anymore--but she did it! And now she's sooooooo anti-drug. She won't even take aspirins and likes herbal remedies. She still drinks sometimes, but only at appropriate times and will never drink and drive. She has a boyfriend now for seven years and they just bought a house. I do think that if they are going to seriously quit and yearn for a better life, it is usually when they get to be around 19-21 or else it's harder and usually a much longer trek. At times it CAN be forever (there's my realism again). I think your son is one of those kids who just needs your support and praise and expect him to slip a few times. But since he's trying, I'd give him some leeway unless you see him going WAY back to where he was. Bad signs would be if you see him hanging with his old "friends" again. Some kids go through a drug phase and get over it. I so wish you all the luck in the world with your boy. I love a success story, believe me :happy:. You ARE going to worry about him though. I still worry about my daughter. I think right now, set him up for success. Don't put too much on him, like leaving him alone at home where his "friends" may find out he's alone and insist he let them in to party...you know how bad these "friends" are. Misery LOVES company. Druggies stick together and don't want to lose anyone. I was shocked and horrified at how they'd push my daughter to use! Please update us. And, remember, he's not going to be perfect, but he's on the right track ;) [/QUOTE]
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