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Substance Abuse
How you deal with other's opinions or judgement
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<blockquote data-quote="Tomorrowtoday" data-source="post: 728184" data-attributes="member: 22794"><p>My son is the same not because of drugs but because they made him responsible for his own medications and he won't take them. I don't even recognize him right now. Honestly if she's not stealing or asking for money then you should be there for her. At 19 I was your daughter. There may be issues you don't understand or that she's trying to protect you from. </p><p></p><p>I'm 37 now and a business owner. My husband works full time. We have a house. The ideas people had about girls who live on the streets nearly ruined my life. I'd go to job interviews and hear "didn't you used to be a hooker?"...I've slept with five people my whole life. The guys I was surrounded by back then were trying to protect me. We were trying to protect eachother from police officers, teachers and social workers who see a kid alone and desperate and try to exploit them. </p><p></p><p>I would literally be dead now if my dad hadn't ALWAYS without question come running when I called and said I needed him. Always. He'd drive me to the hospital or a friends house or home, helped me get an income an a place to live, called me an idiot and said I was making terrible choices. Slipped church brochures under my door and drove around the city just to make sure I was safe. </p><p></p><p>I was awful, cruel. He didn't deserve it. I was also the first person to run to his side when he was injured and in the hospital. I ran errands for him and made sure when I bought things for him he got all the change. I took him for walks in his wheelchair and visited him long after everyone else got bored. </p><p></p><p>The cool, amazing thing about those of us who have been through some things in life is that we don't run away the minute something becomes a challenge. </p><p></p><p>There's an old Chinese proverb: lots of food, little flavor. Little food, lots of flavor. </p><p></p><p>If you've had nothing, you learn to appreciate everything. So be there for her and by be there for her I mean tell her every day that what she's doing is stupid and harmful and she could get sick, or worse. It means something especially coming from the person who gave her orange juice when she had a cold and chicken soup, and brought her clean towels and read her stories at night. </p><p></p><p>Addicts are like people possessed by demons and there are very few small windows of opportunity where the demons clear and the real person inside thinks, with clarity "I done messed up". You'll want to be there for that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tomorrowtoday, post: 728184, member: 22794"] My son is the same not because of drugs but because they made him responsible for his own medications and he won't take them. I don't even recognize him right now. Honestly if she's not stealing or asking for money then you should be there for her. At 19 I was your daughter. There may be issues you don't understand or that she's trying to protect you from. I'm 37 now and a business owner. My husband works full time. We have a house. The ideas people had about girls who live on the streets nearly ruined my life. I'd go to job interviews and hear "didn't you used to be a hooker?"...I've slept with five people my whole life. The guys I was surrounded by back then were trying to protect me. We were trying to protect eachother from police officers, teachers and social workers who see a kid alone and desperate and try to exploit them. I would literally be dead now if my dad hadn't ALWAYS without question come running when I called and said I needed him. Always. He'd drive me to the hospital or a friends house or home, helped me get an income an a place to live, called me an idiot and said I was making terrible choices. Slipped church brochures under my door and drove around the city just to make sure I was safe. I was awful, cruel. He didn't deserve it. I was also the first person to run to his side when he was injured and in the hospital. I ran errands for him and made sure when I bought things for him he got all the change. I took him for walks in his wheelchair and visited him long after everyone else got bored. The cool, amazing thing about those of us who have been through some things in life is that we don't run away the minute something becomes a challenge. There's an old Chinese proverb: lots of food, little flavor. Little food, lots of flavor. If you've had nothing, you learn to appreciate everything. So be there for her and by be there for her I mean tell her every day that what she's doing is stupid and harmful and she could get sick, or worse. It means something especially coming from the person who gave her orange juice when she had a cold and chicken soup, and brought her clean towels and read her stories at night. Addicts are like people possessed by demons and there are very few small windows of opportunity where the demons clear and the real person inside thinks, with clarity "I done messed up". You'll want to be there for that. [/QUOTE]
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