Hubby is 50...and he is feeling old...

[KTMom91]

Hubby turns 50 today! He was a bit discombobulated when his AARP card showed up a few weeks ago, but today...we're going to breakfast at Denny's, because they give you a free meal on your birthday. At least that's what HE says...I say that we're going there because Denny's caters to old people.

I asked him if this means we need to start having dinner at 4 pm so he can be in bed by 9. He does NOT think I am funny.

If anyone has any good old people jokes, feel free to pass them along.

 

[Marcie Mac]

If you go to Red Robin and sign up, you will get a free gormet burger (much better than Denny's)

Marcie

 

[AnnieO]

Since when is 50 old?! My parents are in their mid-60s and I am waiting for them to hit middle age.

We won't be able to do that... No Dennys' around here... And in 9 years (when husband turns 50), who knows!

 

[donna723]

Gotta get in for those Early Bird specials!

I vaguely remember being fifty! I was not happy at all when I got that AARPcard in the mail! I think they sent it to me when I was about 45! But if he feels old now, just wait a few more years till he gets that Medicare card!

 

[susiestar]

My husband was thrilled to get the AARP card. Weird, I know. But he knows he is still about 12 on the inside so he doesn't worry about age. All he saw was a bunch of discounts for stuff, lol! The man LOVES a discount!

 

[DammitJanet]

My father was the discount king...lol. We put the paper to show how much he saved by buying his funeral in advance into his casket...lol. I already have an AARP card because thats who carries my Part D Medicare so I show that to get the discount...lol. Tony does too and with our gray hair no one says a thing!

Hey and I love Medicare so dont knock it!

 

[donna723]

Janet, I'm not knocking Medicare at all! I'm darned glad I've got it!

It's just when that little red, white & blue card comes in the mail, there is no deluding yourself anymore ... you have officially become an "old person"! I certainly don't feel that old! In fact, it never even occurs to me to ask businesses if they have a senior discount! I guess I need to learn to ask. If I go anywhere with my friend Patty, she knows every discount at every business in a hundred-mile radius!

 

[Hound dog]

My husband is 62 and will be 63 in april. He acts about 80. Drives me insane. And he does the bed by 9pm thing......and sleeps until around 10am. omg Of course I have big plans come weather warm up. Needless to say he'll be praying for bed by 9pm and there will be no sleeping until 10am lol

As for AARP I starting getting my invitation to join at 30...........I still get 1 once a month. As does husband. It was a chore to get him to get his Golden Buckeye card (senior discount card) He flat out refuses to join AARP. I'm not so sure........I'll look at their discounts before deciding. lol

 

[donna723]

I never did sign up for AARP either. I didn't think I would get that much benefit from it. My brother loves it though. They travel a lot and he likes the discounts he gets on motels, etc. I, on the other hand, spend most of my time sitting on my butt in my own living room and I don't think there are any discounts you get for that!

 

[Star*]

Okay, okay, okay.......

Gray is beautiful.........ask anyone thats bald.

Gimme a minute to think about 'old' jokes.

Signs You're Getting Older


1. Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.
2. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bi-focals.
3. You feel like the morning after and you haven't been anywhere.
4. Your little black book contains only names that end in M.D.
5. Your children begin to look middle aged.
6. You finally reach the top of the ladder and find it leaning against the wrong wall.
7. Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet.
8. You look forward to a dull evening.
9. Your favorite part of the newspaper is "20 Years Ago Today."
10. You turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.
11. You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
12. Your knees buckle, and your belt won't.
14. You're 17 around the neck, 42 around the waist, and 95 around the golf course.
15. Your back goes out more than you do.
17. Your Pacemaker makes the garage door go up when you see a pretty girl.
18. The little old gray haired lady you helped across the street is your wife.
19. You sink your teeth into a steak, and they stay there.
20. You have too much room in the house and not enough in the medicine cabinet.
21. You get your exercise acting as a pallbearer for your friends who exercise.
22. You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions.
23. You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead.
24. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
25. You buy a compass for the dash of your car.
26. You are proud of your lawn mower.
27. Your best friend is dating someone half their age...and isn't breaking any laws.
28. You call Olan Mills before they call you.
29. Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
30. You sing along with the elevator music.
31. You would rather go to work than stay home sick.
32. You constantly talk about the price of gasoline.
33. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
34. You consider coffee one of the most important things in life.
35. You make an appointment to see the dentist.
36. You no longer think of speed limits as a challange.
37. Neighbors borrow your tools.
38. People call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
39. You have a dream about prunes.
40. You answer a question with, "because I said so."
41. You send money to PBS.
42. The end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of your pants.
43. You take a metal detector to the beach.
44. You wear black socks with sandals.
45. You know what the word "equity" means.
46. You can't remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch TV.
47. Your ears are hairier than your head.
48. You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
49. You got cable for the weather channel (sometimes referred to as "Old Folks MTV"). 50. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

 

[KTMom91]

Thank you, Star! Those are wonderful!

 

[Star*]

My favorite old persons joke is the one Margs Man told on here about a week or so ago ------the one about the cruise ship - OMW I am STILL reeling after that one -

 

[svengandhi]

H got his first AARP card when he turned 30. Sadly, it was meant for his dad, who had died 6 weeks earlier, at 64 years and 11 months, and who had the same first name as H.

I signed him up 5 years ago when he really hit 50. Discounts at Payless and other things. I do better on my own with car insurance but I hear the health insurance is good so when we hit Medicare age, we'll do it. I got myself a membership as well then even though I was only 46 and they've never sent me my own. I paid $60 for 5 years and saved that much in payless shoes the first year.

 

[tawnya]

My mom used to tell them that she hoped they were talking about her mother when they asked her if she wanted the senior discount! She said she would gladly pay the extra money to not be called a "senior." LOL!

She always said she would NOT grow old gracefully -- she would fight it all the way.

By the way, I got in BIG trouble by saying that husband was turning the "double nickles" on his 55th birthday. Shut up, girl! Shut up!

 

[DammitJanet]

Dont feel too bad about Medicare and the little red white and blue card. Cory has one too and he is only 24! LOL. Talk about funny, he has a medicare card and his Part D comes through the same AARP that mine does. People really look confused.

And Star, that list already describes Tony to a T and has for a long time. He is asleep most nights, especially during the weeks, by 9. Of course he gets up by 4! Notice its 3;30 am, I will hit the sack when he leaves because he kicks me all night long. I cant wait for that king sized bed!

 

[Estherfromjerusalem]

Well, all you youngsters! What should I say? I am going to be 66 in July. I can't believe it -- 66. I really don't feel old. I'm still working like crazy, and so is my husband (who is 68). He gets a pension from the job he did (computers), but is now active in a hospital, has just received a certificate as a phlebotomist and now takes blood, puts in intravenous things, and works one day a week as a volunteer in the emergency ward, where they are getting used to him and accepting him as one of the staff, and using him (I call him Dracula!). He also volunteers one day a week for the Magen David Adom emergency medical service, driving around in an ambulance, siren going, etc. He loves it. And he works three days a week at the hospital helping them to run a very specific clinic for a specific hereditary disease. It's quite amazing how involved he has become with medical stuff. At home he's always learning medical stuff on his computer.

Physically I am beginning to feel my age. Bending down is getting more difficult, and although I still have a lot of stamina, my actual physical strength is not what it was. But all in all -- things could certainly be a lot worse. I know one is expected to grow old gracefully (or is that graciously?). So I will try, but it is beginning to get annoying.

Oh well, at least difficult child is now far away. Maybe now my ageing process will slow down!!!!

What is this AARP card you are all talking about? And Medicaid card?

Love, Esther

 

[TerryJ2]

Oh, gosh, I have to look up that cruise ship joke. I always ruin punchlines.

Leave it to Star to have a long list, LOL!

50 is NOT old!

90 is old.

I am surrounded by old people, while I am painting my murals, helping my cousin, my dad, whatever. One difference is that I can walk. Quickly. Even with-sciatica. By the time I'm down the hall and in the elevator, the people at assisted living are just raising their heads and saying, "What?" So as long as I can walk quickly and carry on a conversation in a reasonable amt of time, I am not old.

I'm not promising no face lift, though.

Sorry about your hubby, Mary. I've found that lots of gifts and foot massages help.