Huge news today!

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by PatriotsGirl, Apr 25, 2015.

  1. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    I knew it was coming but it still took me by surprise today. After we got there for visitation granny asked M how long she has been in the program now and she answered back four months and some change. :) then granny called me over to her and started crying while she asked me what I thought about Connor coming to live with M. All the staff were in agreement that M is doing so well that she deserves this. I broke down in tears of course, as always. Not just sad that I was going to miss him, but happy tears because I am just so proud of my baby girl and so thankful to granny and this rehab. So granny called M over and told her that she was moving into the children's dorm on Monday! She will be there a week to get used to it and then Connor will come live with her!!! I am not exactly sure if it will be next weekend or the weekend after but he will be with mommy very, very soon...she was just beyond ecstatic, so happy, so thankful... <3

    We are all very sad here but I told the boys that we are going to have Connor at least one weekend a month, maybe two. And we are all in agreement that he should be with his mommy.

    Connor is being dedicated in the church tomorrow and M will be allowed to walk with him. She asked granny to walk with us, too. :)

    Our family counseling session today was about the dangers of leaving rehab early and how they want the women to stay as long as possible. There are 18 graduates living there and they have a total of 21 children. So Connor will be surrounded by children every day.

    He is so happy when he is with mommy. I am thrilled for them both. It will be hard. He has been my whole life for a while now. So I am crying both happy and sad tears tonight and so are my boys. My son is up there snuggling with him right now... ♡
     
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  2. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    I'm so very happy for you and your family. :)
     
  3. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    WOW! This is wonderful! It is so lovely to hear that she is sincerely working hard for sobriety and that she has made such progress. I remember how distraught you were when you first came here, and how sick your daughter was at that time. Her progress is amazing and she fought hard for that progress. staying at the rehab with her child is a priceless opportunity and I pray that she takes every bit of advantage that she can have by staying there.
     
  4. Rina

    Rina Member

    Definitely awesome news :) it really sounds like she's taking her recovery into her own hands. I hope her son's presence will help her maintain that determination. :) Thank you for the good news!
     
  5. comatheart

    comatheart Active Member

    Wow! That's great news!
     
  6. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Connor's dedication yesterday was so beautiful!! The pastor spoke the most perfect prayer over him. We received so many blessings!! Granny walked with us for the dedication and said the generational curse on our family is broken. :) Then when it was over and time to bring Connor to the kids' club, she actually let M walk with me to bring him downstairs - that is HUGE. The women are normally never allowed to leave the group in the church at any time.

    One of the TOUGHEST caseworkers praised M and told her how proud she was of her. She told her to remember that the newer ladies were looking up to her now as an example of how it works. And then she turned to me and said same for me - new families are looking up to us and seeing that it works - that Jesus reunites, heals and restores families. <3 I remember I balked when I first went there when they told me she would qualify for a weekend pass around August. Now I can't wait to spend that time with her!!

    And one of the most touching moments personally was when one of the other clients placed her hand on my shoulder and said she just wanted me to know that I was an example of an awesome mom and that I was doing such a great job. M enthusiastically nodded her head in agreement. Made me cry (EVERYTHING seems to make me cry these days!!! It is kind of annoying!!).

    It's really no wonder why I am so overprotective of these women and why I get SO angry when people make jokes about addicts on Facebook (disgusting in my opinion). These women are amazing, wonderful women that are fighting the fight of their lives breaking free from these addictions. They deserve our love and respect. Most of them have bigger hearts than most people I know.

    And THAT is why with my newfound free time, I plan on taking the disciple program at our church to go preach in the jails with my friend Cindy that has been doing it for quite some time. :)

    The one thing that has been glaringly obvious to me through this - family is NOT always blood. The two people that have never even commented on any of my Facebook statuses or have offered any words of encouragement are my brother (who is a recovered addict for years now) and my sister. Nice. My brother only wants to talk to me to try to sell his junk toys and my sister only calls me to vent about her husband... :/
     
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  7. DoneDad

    DoneDad Active Member

    Your story is so inspirational. And you're living out what St. Paul says
     
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  8. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    I did not know that scripture. Matter of fact, I have not even read the entire Bible yet. I have a Bible plan on my phone that I listen to daily but have not gotten through it all. I am just following my heart...but reading and studying is exactly how I plan to start this new journey! :)
     
  9. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Oh my goodness. It is looking like it will be this Friday! My heart skipped a beat, but it would be best. That way they have the whole weekend together before she goes back to work on Monday and then the weekend after we have a LOT going on. We will be camping, having M and Connor for her 7 hour pass (we plan on going to Longhorn's for a steak lunch to celebrate Mother's day) and the baptisms...oh my!!
     
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  10. lovemyson1

    lovemyson1 Active Member

    So so so happy for all your good news!!! God is so good! You're experiencing 3 John 1:4
     
  11. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    A mixed blessing for sure. I am so happy to hear how well she is doing and I know you will miss Connor a lot but are also very happy to see him reunited with his mom. And this will give you the chance to do some of the things you want to do to pay it forward. What a blessing.

    My sister has not talked to me ever since my daughter came out of rehab and we had a disagreement over alcohol at our family Christmas get together. While my daughter was in rehab she never once called me or asked anything about how how it was going.

    Hope to hear even more good news in the coming months.
     
  12. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    I swear Connor is trying to make it easier for me this week...lol. He has been acting up a little (terrific two's are definitely beginning) and has NOT been sleeping. EVERY night waking up in the middle of the night. Last night he got up at 2am and was up until after 4am! I am tired. Yes, I will miss him but I am excited to just be Nana again. To be able to take him for the weekend, spoil him and then send him back to momma. She needs to be the one with the sleepless nights and I am beyond thankful that it will be in a safe, structured and supportive environment. :)

    husband and I are planning a long weekend away at the end of June - ALONE. We plan to spend Thursday in Savannah and then Friday - Sunday in Hilton Head on the beach. Oh my goodness I cannot wait!!!! We desperately need this time just together. This Saturday night we will be going to our favorite steak restaurant in the mountains and then stopping in Helen (a Swiss town in the mountains - it is really cool!) for some fudge and maybe a beer. Something we have not done in over 6 months...

    All very good things. I am thrilled for my daughter and her son to be together again. There is no doubt how much they love each other and each time he saw her it got harder and harder for him to say goodbye. It would break my heart in the car when he would cry out for momma.

    And then the weekend after - Mother's day. This is the first one I have really, really looked forward to. She told me she got me a gift and she was so excited that she wanted to give it to me last weekend. But everyone told her to wait. I got her a beautiful heart shaped necklace with mother and child crystals inside. It is beautiful and perfect. :) husband will go pick up our son while I pick up M and Connor on Saturday morning. The plan is to go to Longhorn's for a celebratory lunch before heading back to the park for the baptisms. Happy happy happy!! <3

    Thanks for reading my sappy happiness!! As sad as it is, I really don't have anyone else in my life to share it with...this board has been my family for many years now!! I love you all!!
     
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  13. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    PG I love Hilton Head. We went every year for many years before kids and then when they were young. We went alone two years ago and while it was fun it was the first time we didn't have either of the girls with us and it was a little sad, but I could get use to it lol. We have our favorite restaurants there that we go to every time we are there. A few years ago we made a day trip to Savannah and really enjoyed that also. Have a wonderful time together, you earned it.
    :beach:
     
  14. Tom14

    Tom14 New Member

    I feel you, and I'm happy for you.
     
  15. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Next Friday is the move in day...it will be the perfect weekend for it! :)
     
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  16. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Well, there has been a change of plans. I just received a phone call from the rehab. They have noticed a slight backslide in M's attitude this week and she herself has noticed it and has admitted to feeling a bit overwhelmed and having negative thinking. They want to work with her a little more before Connor comes there full time. They want to transition Connor instead and I completely agree with that. So Connor will spend two full weekends with her there and then it will be a full week every other week and then full time. They want her to be set up for success not failure and I couldn't agree more with that. They said this is NOT a punishment and I told her not to think for one moment that we are disappointed in her! She was crying and telling me she was sorry and I told her there is nothing to be sorry about!!! We are still over the moon proud of her and we agree that this needs to happen the right way. Nothing would be worse than to have Connor go there, her be completely overwhelmed and end up running.

    SO grateful for this rehab!!! SO thankful that they operate the way they do... <3
     
  17. comatheart

    comatheart Active Member

    I think this is a great plan!
     
  18. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I too think this is a very wise plan. Change can be very difficult for our kids, transition needs to be slow and supportive. She will make it.
     
  19. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    My husband and I both agree this is for the best. For him AND her. :)

    They gave her the option of having her 7 hour pass this weekend and delaying Connor coming another week or foregoing the pass and not delaying him going. She decided to forego the pass. The Assistant Director said that was being a mom. I told husband and he agreed that she made the right decision. :) I told her don't worry, since she can't go to Longhorn's, we will bring Longhorn's to her! (We still get to go see her for visitation on Saturday). All good. God has a plan. And for a very personal reason and one I have really been praying on this week, it is really good. It may not look the way I wanted it to, but it answers what I have been praying on. Man alive, I just keep getting astounded with the way He answers prayers...it is SO impossible for me not to believe...
     
  20. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    My husband and I both agree this is for the best. For him AND her. :)

    They gave her the option of having her 7 hour pass this weekend and delaying Connor coming another week or foregoing the pass and not delaying him going. She decided to forego the pass. The Assistant Director said that was being a mom. I told husband and he agreed that she made the right decision. :) I told her don't worry, since she can't go to Longhorn's, we will bring Longhorn's to her! (We still get to go see her for visitation on Saturday). All good. God has a plan. And for a very personal reason and one I have really been praying on this week, it is really good. It may not look the way I wanted it to, but it answers what I have been praying on. Man alive, I just keep getting astounded with the way He answers prayers...it is SO impossible for me not to believe...
     
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