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I acted on a suspicion
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 691014" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Lil, I know how hard this is. It is the hardest thing in the entire world to do. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>See...that IS the leverage. Only when they HAVE to figure it out on their own...that's when it can start. When they have that safety net---for my son it was the tiniest thing---they don't/won't/can't do it.</p><p></p><p>Your son may have more serious mental issues. I don't know. It seems to me that when he was in the apartment and he was working more than the other two, that was a very good thing for him to experience and see. He was the top of the food chain compared with the other two. He was giving them advice, and he was working to make things happen. </p><p></p><p>At home, with Mommy and Daddy (my son too), they regress. They regress emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually back to being the little boy and being taken care of.</p><p></p><p>It is not a good situation for them, to live at home under any circumstances.</p><p></p><p>It's very sad to say and hard to watch, but sometimes people have to live at the very bottom for a while before they get it. My son did. I kept thinking surely THIS is the bottom, and then it wasn't...and the next time wasn't either...and so on.</p><p></p><p>His bottom was unbelievable to me. </p><p></p><p>The incentive to change comes from absolutely having to change because there is no other choice. Many still won't change. Some will. Perhaps your son needs that chance, to see if he is one who will. </p><p></p><p>You can only do what you and Jabber can live with. It's all okay, whatever that is.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 691014, member: 17542"] Lil, I know how hard this is. It is the hardest thing in the entire world to do. See...that IS the leverage. Only when they HAVE to figure it out on their own...that's when it can start. When they have that safety net---for my son it was the tiniest thing---they don't/won't/can't do it. Your son may have more serious mental issues. I don't know. It seems to me that when he was in the apartment and he was working more than the other two, that was a very good thing for him to experience and see. He was the top of the food chain compared with the other two. He was giving them advice, and he was working to make things happen. At home, with Mommy and Daddy (my son too), they regress. They regress emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually back to being the little boy and being taken care of. It is not a good situation for them, to live at home under any circumstances. It's very sad to say and hard to watch, but sometimes people have to live at the very bottom for a while before they get it. My son did. I kept thinking surely THIS is the bottom, and then it wasn't...and the next time wasn't either...and so on. His bottom was unbelievable to me. The incentive to change comes from absolutely having to change because there is no other choice. Many still won't change. Some will. Perhaps your son needs that chance, to see if he is one who will. You can only do what you and Jabber can live with. It's all okay, whatever that is. [/QUOTE]
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