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I. Am. About. To. Explode.
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 307519" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Thanks, Ladies! I'll put more effort into moving than staying around here now for sure. It's amazing how many things I am remembering now that put this into place. </p><p></p><p>No, Star, there is no way my bro would do that. He's on record with DSS as wanting difficult child under any circumstances and will fight for custody and will lie to get it. </p><p></p><p>difficult child's last defense attny- a court appointment one- insinuated that the GAL was the reason a lot of things transpired the way they did. When we discussed some of her questionable tactics I asked him if I should file a complaint against her and he told me no because if I did she would fight me, ruin me, and make sure difficult child never came back home. (This obviously doesn't point to a person driven by what's in a child's best interest.) He said he knew her and I am sure that's true because they both let me know that they don't speak to each other except in legal situations where they have no choice. </p><p></p><p>Anyway, he said my best hope was to put in a short request in writing right before difficult child's release asking the court to change the GAL "in order to get a fresh perspective" and leave it at that. I think it's a long shot that they would change the GAL but even if they did, it would be changed to someone she knows and works with so staying here and doing that is a last resort.</p><p></p><p>I can EASILY picture the GAL telling a PO "they need this, this, and this, and don't let her get out of it no matter what". This would be why probation officer and her super stood fast by the "it's your (My) problem" position when all this cost me my job. This would explain why the new parol officer, when I was discussing with him that I couldn't meet all those requirements and keep a full time job so difficult child might have to go to a group home, he said "oh, well, you go discuss that with difficult child's GAL". Because GAL knows she's got DSS an arm's length away. And of course, difficult child going to DSS gets him straight to my bro without a custody case where the judge looks at which person is in the child's best interest.</p><p></p><p>It's a real shame that DSS really does not have a choice even when a kid says he'd rather go to Department of Juvenile Justice or foster care than to live with this person, who isn't even a bio-parent, never lived near him, never helped support him or parent him, seen him about 10 times in his entire life, and hasn't even had contact with difficult child in over two years, which was difficult child's choice. But that's our wonderful state law. Now, since my bro is gay and living with a SO, he wouldn't qualify as being an option if he lived in this state because we have laws against that. But since he lives out of state, the DSS there would be the ones to approve him. That's ironic too because in his state, there are laws against a gay couple adopting a child but they are allowed to be foster parents.</p><p></p><p>Moving scares me too though because at least the judge here gets it. She's just trying to find a happy medium between keeping difficult child out of DSS even when GAL pushes it and following CSU's recommendations- which is why we end up with continuous "monitoring", I think. So if we move to a new jurisdiction, what if difficult child gets in trouble and they only look at the file sent from CSU and turn difficult child straight over to their DSS? I think difficult child needs to understand that he has no room to get into trouble again if he's expecting to live at home until he's 18 yo. The advantage I guess, of moving is that the PO probably would be more reasonable about the parole requirements and coordinating them with my job. They probably would be more apt to listen if I said we were having a hardship at home. So, it <em>should</em> give difficult child a better chance to stay out of trouble.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 307519, member: 3699"] Thanks, Ladies! I'll put more effort into moving than staying around here now for sure. It's amazing how many things I am remembering now that put this into place. No, Star, there is no way my bro would do that. He's on record with DSS as wanting difficult child under any circumstances and will fight for custody and will lie to get it. difficult child's last defense attny- a court appointment one- insinuated that the GAL was the reason a lot of things transpired the way they did. When we discussed some of her questionable tactics I asked him if I should file a complaint against her and he told me no because if I did she would fight me, ruin me, and make sure difficult child never came back home. (This obviously doesn't point to a person driven by what's in a child's best interest.) He said he knew her and I am sure that's true because they both let me know that they don't speak to each other except in legal situations where they have no choice. Anyway, he said my best hope was to put in a short request in writing right before difficult child's release asking the court to change the GAL "in order to get a fresh perspective" and leave it at that. I think it's a long shot that they would change the GAL but even if they did, it would be changed to someone she knows and works with so staying here and doing that is a last resort. I can EASILY picture the GAL telling a PO "they need this, this, and this, and don't let her get out of it no matter what". This would be why probation officer and her super stood fast by the "it's your (My) problem" position when all this cost me my job. This would explain why the new parol officer, when I was discussing with him that I couldn't meet all those requirements and keep a full time job so difficult child might have to go to a group home, he said "oh, well, you go discuss that with difficult child's GAL". Because GAL knows she's got DSS an arm's length away. And of course, difficult child going to DSS gets him straight to my bro without a custody case where the judge looks at which person is in the child's best interest. It's a real shame that DSS really does not have a choice even when a kid says he'd rather go to Department of Juvenile Justice or foster care than to live with this person, who isn't even a bio-parent, never lived near him, never helped support him or parent him, seen him about 10 times in his entire life, and hasn't even had contact with difficult child in over two years, which was difficult child's choice. But that's our wonderful state law. Now, since my bro is gay and living with a SO, he wouldn't qualify as being an option if he lived in this state because we have laws against that. But since he lives out of state, the DSS there would be the ones to approve him. That's ironic too because in his state, there are laws against a gay couple adopting a child but they are allowed to be foster parents. Moving scares me too though because at least the judge here gets it. She's just trying to find a happy medium between keeping difficult child out of DSS even when GAL pushes it and following CSU's recommendations- which is why we end up with continuous "monitoring", I think. So if we move to a new jurisdiction, what if difficult child gets in trouble and they only look at the file sent from CSU and turn difficult child straight over to their DSS? I think difficult child needs to understand that he has no room to get into trouble again if he's expecting to live at home until he's 18 yo. The advantage I guess, of moving is that the PO probably would be more reasonable about the parole requirements and coordinating them with my job. They probably would be more apt to listen if I said we were having a hardship at home. So, it [I]should[/I] give difficult child a better chance to stay out of trouble. [/QUOTE]
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