Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
I am sad and desperate and hopeless again
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 745751" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>What a good point, Elsi. Even if our adult kids are incapable of doing better, even if they qualify for services, we can only help them get assistance if they will cooperate with us and comply with the rules. I was very lucky that my son accepted the services and rules and lives independently. Many adult kids will not do what is needed to get services that they qualify for. If they wont accept help and are unable to take care of themselves, it is the same as if they were capable and just wont take care of themselves. It causes equal angst.</p><p></p><p>If they have an illness.....either addiction, another mental illness or a physical illness.....and are more vulnerable.....we STILL cant help them if they refuse to take care of their illnesses. It is heartbreaking but up to them only.</p><p></p><p>It still always comes down to one thing: only the person can take of himself, only the person can make his situation better. Even if it means applying for and accepting help. They have to agree to it. That is all they have to do. Agree they need help, accept it and do what is necessary to get help. Its not hard to do. But many wont. And .so they are worse off and we have no power to force anything.</p><p></p><p>Copa it does not help J to tie yourself to the train tracks. And you are not helpless. Helpless to fix him....sure. None of us have power over another. But you are strong. You have taken care of yourself all of your life. Well! You may FEEL helpless but feelings arent facts (I like that saying).</p><p></p><p>J at least qualifies for SSDI services. He isnt helpless. He CAN get section 8, a food card, Medicare, workforce development services and a case manager.He is capable of getting any sort of medical help. But so far he wont. Its very sad that you cant reason with him but he wont let you help him.</p><p></p><p>Have a cup of hot cocoa and a peaceful night!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 745751, member: 1550"] What a good point, Elsi. Even if our adult kids are incapable of doing better, even if they qualify for services, we can only help them get assistance if they will cooperate with us and comply with the rules. I was very lucky that my son accepted the services and rules and lives independently. Many adult kids will not do what is needed to get services that they qualify for. If they wont accept help and are unable to take care of themselves, it is the same as if they were capable and just wont take care of themselves. It causes equal angst. If they have an illness.....either addiction, another mental illness or a physical illness.....and are more vulnerable.....we STILL cant help them if they refuse to take care of their illnesses. It is heartbreaking but up to them only. It still always comes down to one thing: only the person can take of himself, only the person can make his situation better. Even if it means applying for and accepting help. They have to agree to it. That is all they have to do. Agree they need help, accept it and do what is necessary to get help. Its not hard to do. But many wont. And .so they are worse off and we have no power to force anything. Copa it does not help J to tie yourself to the train tracks. And you are not helpless. Helpless to fix him....sure. None of us have power over another. But you are strong. You have taken care of yourself all of your life. Well! You may FEEL helpless but feelings arent facts (I like that saying). J at least qualifies for SSDI services. He isnt helpless. He CAN get section 8, a food card, Medicare, workforce development services and a case manager.He is capable of getting any sort of medical help. But so far he wont. Its very sad that you cant reason with him but he wont let you help him. Have a cup of hot cocoa and a peaceful night! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
I am sad and desperate and hopeless again
Top