I am so tired of his attitude I WANT SCHOOL TO START

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, Aug 18, 2009.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    The last 2 wks of summer are always the worst. I want to tear out my hair.
    I just need to be alone.

    difficult child has had all summer to read 2 books and write two book reports and make a poster. You know what's coming next. He's just working on them now. He starts school Monday.

    One of the books is The Bronze Bow. It's about a fictional character named Daniel who hates the Romans, befriends a Jew and meets Jesus, and decides to follow him. (Remember, he's going to a Catholic school now.)

    The instruction sheet says to compare/contrast the 3 civilizations/cultures: Roman, Judaism in Palestine, and Christianity.

    difficult child can't/won't do it. Why? Because Jesus talked about Judaism throughout the book. He never talked about Christianity.


    Do you know how long I talked to him? I could feel my blood pressure going up and actually had to leave the house.

    I KNOW he's literal. But how do I get through to him? I showed him a part of the book that talked about how poor, sick people came to Simon the Fisherman's house to meet Jesus, and how they were all fed and treated nicely. I explained that was the "new" Judaism/Christianity, that the religion wasn't just for the rich and famous.
    He wasn't buying it. He didn't understand the examples.

    He typed one tiny paragraph. He said Daniel met some family and had dinner and liked the ideas they had.
    Okay, good level of detail, or at least, on the right track.

    That's all I could get out of him.

    I told my easy child and her boyfriend that I would pay them $10/hr to get difficult child to understand the concept. Fine. They said everything was great and took off for the beach. I found notes that easy child had written on the back of the school instruction sheet, outlining how difficult child could organize his paper. Did he type anything new on the computer? Nope.

    I talked to husband at B&N during our wkly biz mtng, and he got very excited about it because he's a Christian and a Baptist and loves to talk about all that kind of thing (as much as I hate to and am bored with-it). Did he talk to difficult child? Nope. He did, however, find time to pick up branches in the yard and lie on the dock. It's his day off.

    I am ready to blow up the house.

    I did difficult child's back-to-school shopping at Ofc Depot with-o him. I don't care if he hates everything I got. If I have time, I'm going to return a few things and see if I can better prices at Walmart. Right now I just want a glass of wine or some chocolate ice cream.

    Thanks for listening.

    P.S. Do I dare ask him what, exactly, the Bronze Bow was used for? :faint:
  2. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

  3. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Thanks. I emailed my little sister, who was a student teacher for a while, and she came up with-a good idea: tell him to do exactly what the teacher typed on the sheet.
    Never mind if he really understands it. Just tell him that what he typed isn't an "example" and it doesn't compare the civilizations. If the teacher says that Christianity is a civilization, then find examples to make it one. It's all about what the teacher wants.
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    husband and difficult child only spent 2 hrs together today, and husband just brought difficult child home from football practice and they're shouting at one another.
    I kind of like it when this happens, because I feel vindicated, after having spent the entire summer together ... but on the other hand, I don't want husband to have a meltdown because he has weaker coping skills.
    This is why we have doors on our rooms ...
  5. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Don't you think hw shouldn't be required over the summer? I can understand your frustrations. I agree the last two weeks are always the worst. Luckily we were able to get difficult child into a day camp because he has been really having a lot of problems lately. Hugs to you!
  6. graceupongrace

    graceupongrace New Member


    Sounds like it's time for wine and chocolate ice cream -- lol! I know they don't usually go together, but extraordinary situations (like end-of-summer homework dramas) call for extraordinary measures. :tongue:
  7. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    Put away the explosives! LOL!!!!

    Kuddos to you for paying your easy child $10 an hour to help difficult child with- his homework.
    As look as it doesn't stress her out to do it, it relieves you of h/w duty and gives her some extra spending cash. A win-win if I ever heard one.

    I would secretly search the neighborhood for a second tier h/w helper. Perhaps a responsible high school student.

    DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT, constantly put yourself in this situation where you are overhwhelmed or worse.

    You mentioned your blood pressure. Well, guess what? I had too much stress in the household with- my kids and one day my blood pressure went completely haywire and NEVER fully returned with-o medication. That was it folks! One day good BiPolar (BP) and the next day...MEDICATION to keep my numbers down.

    Also, I think 1.5 hour of h/w time is pretty much a maximum. Perhaps you can do another 30 minutes much later in the day (maybe). Our son and daughter in law tutor, and they try very hard to do more than 1.5 hours at a time. They only do 2 hours with students who can concentrate well. They definately keep it at a maximum of 1.5 hours if the student has been identified as having any special needs.

    I agree, concentrate on the specifics of what "teacher" wants.

    Glad the summer is almost over...wishing you well.
  8. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    I actually have to give your difficult child credit....because he is absolutely correct that based solely on the book--he cannot compare and contrast Christianity.

    HOWEVER--perhaps if you explain that his teacher made a small mistake in her instructions and meant to say compare and contrast how those civilizations treated their citizens with the way Jesus treated citizens. THAT should all be evident from the book and difficult child should be able to compare and contrast quite easily...

    Good luck!!!

  9. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Thank you all.

    I went out and bought a box of Absolutely Divine milk chocolate topped butter cookies. Unfortunately, even though I hurriedly opened the box in the car, immediately upon purchase, the little picture stamped on the chocolates had melted ... Of course, I ate a half doz anyway.
    Then I came home and poured myself a glass of pinot grigio. :)

    husband called and asked if it was okay to take difficult child to McD (with-o the bun, of course.), since they'd practiced for 2-1/2 hrs and he was hungry. Yup. That gave me an extra 1/2 hr of peace. Ahhhhhhh.

    This a.m., difficult child woke me up stating that his poster was finished and he was going to a friend's house.

    He showed it to me. Hmm. Nice start. Great headings, b&w on a blk background. Tiny pics I printed out yesterday. Two tiny paragraphs. I said it was nice but not enough.
    He stated flatly that he was finished and was going to a friend's house.

    I told him his friend's mother was coming over to home school him for the homework assignment. (I actually did call the mom yesterday, in a panic. She homeschooled all 3 of her kids, and she's a Christian. But we missed one another's calls.)

    All of a sudden, he's at the computer, typing. I guess he didn't like the idea that his friend's mom was going to come over ... ;)

    Where there's a will, there's a way. And I've got a stronger will than he has. ;)
    Last edited: Aug 19, 2009
  10. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    P.S. I actually agree with-the idea of homework over the summer, because it takes so long for most kids (and difficult children, in particular) to get their minds to a place where they can study and follow school routines, the homework keeps them in the groove.

    One book down, one to go. :) The other one is The Secret Garden. I have no idea why he chose that one. Sigh.
  11. Christy

    Christy New Member

    Good luck with book number two. I hope the writing assignment is more straight forward this time around.

    I agree with you about having homework in the summer, my son does a math lesson and a reading assignment a few days a week to keep in the groove. Poor kid is stuck with a teacher for a mom, LOL!
  12. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Sending you lots of strength, more wine, and a nice massage. Raoul? Terry is ready now.
  13. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Raoul was almost displaced by Miliani in Hawaii, LOL!

    It turns out the the Bronze Bow could not be broken or bent by human hands. But when Jesus came along, the main characters wondered whether it could be bent by love.
    difficult child insists that the main point of the book was talking about the bronze bow in a secret mtng place where Jesus would show up every now and then.
    I tried to explain that the bronze bow was a metaphor for love and war but he wasn't buying it.
    I feel for his teachers this yr.