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I bought my kid a tent today, he's homeless.
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<blockquote data-quote="JayPee" data-source="post: 757044" data-attributes="member: 23405"><p>I could be wrong but the way I see it is that it's a balancing act. We want to practice what Al anon says and to know the three C's (didn't cause it, can't cure it and can't control it) so I think I understand what you're saying. We take this seriously in our recovery to get better but I agree too with JMom in her decision to confront the truth and then let it be. She isn't trying to cure or control it from my perspective and that shows a lot of recovery.</p><p></p><p>I think that's where some people don't get it and really I was there a few years ago too. They think that confronting the addict and demanding they see their problem is going to be the saving grace and they will have done their part to assist the addict. Well, that may make a person "feel" good but we all know that it has to be the choice of the addict to find recovery. No amount of love, no begging, pleading, groveling will ever change them. </p><p></p><p>I tried for three decades to get my ex-husband sober. During all that time I lost site of myself. What I wanted, who I was, what made me valuable.</p><p></p><p>That's why when I can remind someone to take care of themselves, I really mean it. I never did that and it may take me another three decades to really see myself a valuable person but at least I'm headed in the right direction now.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JayPee, post: 757044, member: 23405"] I could be wrong but the way I see it is that it's a balancing act. We want to practice what Al anon says and to know the three C's (didn't cause it, can't cure it and can't control it) so I think I understand what you're saying. We take this seriously in our recovery to get better but I agree too with JMom in her decision to confront the truth and then let it be. She isn't trying to cure or control it from my perspective and that shows a lot of recovery. I think that's where some people don't get it and really I was there a few years ago too. They think that confronting the addict and demanding they see their problem is going to be the saving grace and they will have done their part to assist the addict. Well, that may make a person "feel" good but we all know that it has to be the choice of the addict to find recovery. No amount of love, no begging, pleading, groveling will ever change them. I tried for three decades to get my ex-husband sober. During all that time I lost site of myself. What I wanted, who I was, what made me valuable. That's why when I can remind someone to take care of themselves, I really mean it. I never did that and it may take me another three decades to really see myself a valuable person but at least I'm headed in the right direction now. [/QUOTE]
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I bought my kid a tent today, he's homeless.
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