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I can't do this....
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 692797" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>And it also allows us to do what is best for them which is to experience life without us guiding them and/or taking the consequences, of softening them. </p><p></p><p>I do not think I ever really chose to put myself first, although it might have felt like that. M was the first one to see that, no matter how much I declared I wanted my son I was dying inside, just withering. </p><p></p><p>I do not think it ever became for me, my welfare over his. I believe that what clicked for me was that it was horrible for both of us for him to abuse me and to me to allow it and for me to watch and to permit him to destroy himself. That was the rock bottom for me. That gave me the strength to stop that. </p><p></p><p>No more destroying yourself and me and my watching helplessly. That is how I understand it now. Hitting bottom for me was not tolerating any more of that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 692797, member: 18958"] And it also allows us to do what is best for them which is to experience life without us guiding them and/or taking the consequences, of softening them. I do not think I ever really chose to put myself first, although it might have felt like that. M was the first one to see that, no matter how much I declared I wanted my son I was dying inside, just withering. I do not think it ever became for me, my welfare over his. I believe that what clicked for me was that it was horrible for both of us for him to abuse me and to me to allow it and for me to watch and to permit him to destroy himself. That was the rock bottom for me. That gave me the strength to stop that. No more destroying yourself and me and my watching helplessly. That is how I understand it now. Hitting bottom for me was not tolerating any more of that. [/QUOTE]
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