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i could use about 20 hugs and a drink
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 137484" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>I'm lucky that I've always been able to trust the men in my life. However, I did have a relationship with a man who didn't trust. He was constantly checking on my emails, listening to my messages and so on. Ultimately, I broke up with him. I was and am a flirt. However, I have never and will never cheat on someone I am dating, let alone living with. He knew this going into the relationship. He lost me because of his "trust issues."</p><p> </p><p>Has he gone out with this woman? Has he kissed her, had sex with her or anything that is truly cheating? He may have come close, may have wanted to, but did he act on it? </p><p> </p><p>Honestly, trust issues or not, you need to quit snooping. He's only going to tolerate it so long before he shows you the door. Get counseling together.</p><p> </p><p>I have had male friends who were in relationships and marriages. Many times, the SOs were included if they so chose. However, there were a couple of friendships where the SO wasn't. My best male friend would never include his SO. Not by my choice, but by my friend. Definitely not because there was anything going on but rather because I was his sounding board. He would vent about his girl friends and, ultimately, his wife. He would get my advice for gifts, special occasions, anything and everything. Heck, I even told him to marry his wife. I doubt the dolt would have thought it by himself.</p><p> </p><p>I am more in the line of thinking of Janet and GoingNorth. Honestly, if I were the male in your relationship, you'd be history. You've crossed too many lines. I don't know if you're really overreacting but my gut feeling is you are. However, the constant snooping, the lack of trust will ultimately erode any relationship no matter what the past history.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 137484, member: 3626"] I'm lucky that I've always been able to trust the men in my life. However, I did have a relationship with a man who didn't trust. He was constantly checking on my emails, listening to my messages and so on. Ultimately, I broke up with him. I was and am a flirt. However, I have never and will never cheat on someone I am dating, let alone living with. He knew this going into the relationship. He lost me because of his "trust issues." Has he gone out with this woman? Has he kissed her, had sex with her or anything that is truly cheating? He may have come close, may have wanted to, but did he act on it? Honestly, trust issues or not, you need to quit snooping. He's only going to tolerate it so long before he shows you the door. Get counseling together. I have had male friends who were in relationships and marriages. Many times, the SOs were included if they so chose. However, there were a couple of friendships where the SO wasn't. My best male friend would never include his SO. Not by my choice, but by my friend. Definitely not because there was anything going on but rather because I was his sounding board. He would vent about his girl friends and, ultimately, his wife. He would get my advice for gifts, special occasions, anything and everything. Heck, I even told him to marry his wife. I doubt the dolt would have thought it by himself. I am more in the line of thinking of Janet and GoingNorth. Honestly, if I were the male in your relationship, you'd be history. You've crossed too many lines. I don't know if you're really overreacting but my gut feeling is you are. However, the constant snooping, the lack of trust will ultimately erode any relationship no matter what the past history. [/QUOTE]
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