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Substance Abuse
I don't know what to do
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 572431" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Your son sounds a lot like my daughter but, of course, drug addicts live similar lives. If he has tried heroin, like my daughter did, he is hardcore. My daughter slept all day too until we finally told her she was out. She went to another state to live with her brother, a straight-arrow and she got her act together slowly, but she had to follow her brother's extremely strict rules or be out on the street and what worked is that I'm sure s he knew he meant it. She couldn't even smoke cigarettes. </p><p></p><p>She found herself walking to a two bit job at Subway and did a good job, was elevated to manager. She had to give 1/4th of her check to her brother for rent. She had no car so she did not "hang out." She mostly had to stay home and had a lot of time to think. She quit everything, even cigarettes. Then she met her boyfriend at work. Today they own a house together, she has gone back to school and gotten a degree (on her own dime) in her chosen field, has a good job and is a responsible member of society. But she tells me that she never would have changed if we hadn't thrown her out. </p><p></p><p>You can get your son all the help in the world and if he doesn't want to quit, he won't quit and you're out money. I recolmmend you start going to Al-Anon or Narc-Anon groups for real life face-to-face support and help. You can't change him, but you can help yourself. I would tell son that he either goes into rehab or has to find another place to live. You most certainly CAN force the issue and you should. You are making it very comfortable for him to practice his self-destructive addiction in the comfort of your home. And if you pay for his cell phone, car, car insurance, anything...you are even making it kind of fun for him. We cut our daughter off from any money as soon as we found out she was using drugs and we bought her what she needed, and it wasn't the internet, a cell phone, a car, etc.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 572431, member: 1550"] Your son sounds a lot like my daughter but, of course, drug addicts live similar lives. If he has tried heroin, like my daughter did, he is hardcore. My daughter slept all day too until we finally told her she was out. She went to another state to live with her brother, a straight-arrow and she got her act together slowly, but she had to follow her brother's extremely strict rules or be out on the street and what worked is that I'm sure s he knew he meant it. She couldn't even smoke cigarettes. She found herself walking to a two bit job at Subway and did a good job, was elevated to manager. She had to give 1/4th of her check to her brother for rent. She had no car so she did not "hang out." She mostly had to stay home and had a lot of time to think. She quit everything, even cigarettes. Then she met her boyfriend at work. Today they own a house together, she has gone back to school and gotten a degree (on her own dime) in her chosen field, has a good job and is a responsible member of society. But she tells me that she never would have changed if we hadn't thrown her out. You can get your son all the help in the world and if he doesn't want to quit, he won't quit and you're out money. I recolmmend you start going to Al-Anon or Narc-Anon groups for real life face-to-face support and help. You can't change him, but you can help yourself. I would tell son that he either goes into rehab or has to find another place to live. You most certainly CAN force the issue and you should. You are making it very comfortable for him to practice his self-destructive addiction in the comfort of your home. And if you pay for his cell phone, car, car insurance, anything...you are even making it kind of fun for him. We cut our daughter off from any money as soon as we found out she was using drugs and we bought her what she needed, and it wasn't the internet, a cell phone, a car, etc. [/QUOTE]
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