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I feel like the worst mom ever.....
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 115702" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Amy, </p><p></p><p>HI and welcome. One doctors opinion doesn't weigh very heavy with me. It certainly NEVER spoke more than my maternal instincts. When things/people/places/doctors who didn't know my son very well gave opinions on his diagnosis - that's what they were. Opinions. </p><p></p><p>A few things I've learned with a 17 yo difficult child. </p><p></p><p>If it doesn't feel right - you can switch doctors/therapists/etc. </p><p>If it goes against my grain - it's probably wrong for me and mine </p><p>Just because a person went to college does not mean they've spent time with MY kid in OUR particular situation. Variables are everything. NO one kid fits into a hole or square. </p><p></p><p>And - probably the best thing we ever did as a tired, worn out, fleeting health family? We sought out the best psychologist we could find - liked him, trusted him and we ALL (entire family) went to therapy. I needed someone else to sit back and say "Here's what I see that you're doing which isnt' working." and then offer suggestions to formulate a battle plan where DF and I are united -learn the in's and out's of effective communication - How to dissarm a difficult child, how to SPEAK so you are heard, how to be silent so you are heard, and how to pick and choose our battles. </p><p></p><p>Without having a battle plan to literally battle difficult child in our home - we wouldn't have ever made it. And by no means is that any reference to a success story - our road and life with difficult child was littered with books, medicines, Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s, hospitals,elimination diets, begging, pleading, crying - hoping, and mostly praying. </p><p></p><p>My engagement would have ended in divorce before I got married if DF hadn't gotten on board with the therapist - and eventually he got to where he enjoyed going and finding out what we were going to do next to sabotage difficult child's "evil plot" - what we did worked for us. </p><p></p><p>I'd say if you didn't get success with the last psychiatric, find another one, and if that one isn't a match - find another one and so on. </p><p></p><p>Good luck - </p><p>While you're waiting for an evaluation - what would be wrong with trying some elimination diets to see if his behavior is linked to something he's eating. It's a far cry from therapy - but it's a start. difficult child can't to this day eat anything with red dye in it - Hawiian punch sends him to the moon and back with a very nasty attitude. Allergies are another thought. Just throwing out suggestions - not trying to make you think he doesn't have ODD. </p><p></p><p>Hugs</p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 115702, member: 4964"] Amy, HI and welcome. One doctors opinion doesn't weigh very heavy with me. It certainly NEVER spoke more than my maternal instincts. When things/people/places/doctors who didn't know my son very well gave opinions on his diagnosis - that's what they were. Opinions. A few things I've learned with a 17 yo difficult child. If it doesn't feel right - you can switch doctors/therapists/etc. If it goes against my grain - it's probably wrong for me and mine Just because a person went to college does not mean they've spent time with MY kid in OUR particular situation. Variables are everything. NO one kid fits into a hole or square. And - probably the best thing we ever did as a tired, worn out, fleeting health family? We sought out the best psychologist we could find - liked him, trusted him and we ALL (entire family) went to therapy. I needed someone else to sit back and say "Here's what I see that you're doing which isnt' working." and then offer suggestions to formulate a battle plan where DF and I are united -learn the in's and out's of effective communication - How to dissarm a difficult child, how to SPEAK so you are heard, how to be silent so you are heard, and how to pick and choose our battles. Without having a battle plan to literally battle difficult child in our home - we wouldn't have ever made it. And by no means is that any reference to a success story - our road and life with difficult child was littered with books, medicines, Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s, hospitals,elimination diets, begging, pleading, crying - hoping, and mostly praying. My engagement would have ended in divorce before I got married if DF hadn't gotten on board with the therapist - and eventually he got to where he enjoyed going and finding out what we were going to do next to sabotage difficult child's "evil plot" - what we did worked for us. I'd say if you didn't get success with the last psychiatric, find another one, and if that one isn't a match - find another one and so on. Good luck - While you're waiting for an evaluation - what would be wrong with trying some elimination diets to see if his behavior is linked to something he's eating. It's a far cry from therapy - but it's a start. difficult child can't to this day eat anything with red dye in it - Hawiian punch sends him to the moon and back with a very nasty attitude. Allergies are another thought. Just throwing out suggestions - not trying to make you think he doesn't have ODD. Hugs Star [/QUOTE]
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