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i feel so guilty
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<blockquote data-quote="Jena" data-source="post: 418417" data-attributes="member: 4514"><p>wow you guys are amazing, seriously. i posted this with such guilt and like oh man their going to be like jen no wonder difficult child is off the wall lol. yet unfortunately she's always been like this....</p><p> </p><p>i do set aside time for him and i when he gets home almost each night, yet difficult child tries to ruin it. so we have to fight with-keeping door closed while she bangs away or calls my name. we're in mist of medication change so its' bumpy.</p><p> </p><p>kids don't literally disrespect him, easy child loves him. yet difficult child just ignores him totally it's like he doesnt' exist. its' hard for him. he comes home and says hi and she grunts at him.</p><p> </p><p>his work schedule is hard, i felt so bad when he said you make these great dinners i hear about yet out of respect you never leave me some, i get i walk in at midnight but dont' i deserve that? point taken, so yup he'll be getting dinner wrapped each night.</p><p> </p><p>laundry i do, yet this week i faltered, my legs were bad and i couldnt' make it up and down basement stairs. i think he's more upset about his socks. sounds absurd yet he has feet and ankle problems and so i just bought him these special socks and the kids come into his drawer and take them all the time. we will now lock door.</p><p> </p><p>he does need to stand up for me with kids. he literally NEVER does. easy child or difficult child can be going at me and he stays away. def. not a united front. HAOZI great point.</p><p> </p><p>other junk too like you guys mentioned he comes home i'm rarely all smiles, i usually vent first after i ask how was your day i go on about easy child or difficult child. never do i just meet him to spend time with him without the junk. that'll change.</p><p> </p><p>his blow up, well it wasnt' like an argument.he just toppled over, and what was very wrong was he grabbed his kids and walked out. we were supposed to go to his sister's to see her new baby. and he just walked out with-his kids stating to me i do not want to talk to you. so difficult child fell apart. doesnt' take much and well any kid would be upset. than he kept coming from truck back in house again, he was just so upset and all over the board.</p><p> </p><p>difficult child at one point said look what your doing, what's wrong with you your nuts mom should divorce you. he simply said difficult child i'm sorry i'm upset infront of you but you have to wake up to what's going on here and your mom who you think is perfect. ah thats' where he faltered</p><p> </p><p>it is alot, and its' hard because he does get home so late. so i'm already tired. yet i chose this life you guys are right. clothes should be clean, dinner saved and i'll start there. yet i also told him no more of this meltdown stuff. it isnt' healthy for kids or either of us. we were like that cop show on tv. domestic situation at such and such address lol. so embarrassing. i mean neighbors were looking because we're close to them and he put kids in truck and kept coming back and forth. also the ex now blocked is causing tension as well. i'</p><p>m not sure if he's unblocking her, yet it seems like he'll ask me to block then block comes off than i reset again. not sure what's giong on there. he said it isnt' him.</p><p> </p><p>i got mad at difficult child at one point, i said listen i get you want me all to yourself she smiled and said yea. i said you got me all day long. he's here two days a week only and midnights. when he comes home other than a hi to him and brief talk if your up you do not disturb us no banging on door screaming mom etc. not allowed.</p><p> </p><p>she said well you love him and always forgive him when he loses it. i said listen there are things that he's feeling that you aren't aware of that frustrate him and he wasnt' able to express those before now so it built up. she said well if he wasnt' here you'd lay in bed with-me at night so i could sleep etc. i said no i wouldn't. she said you love him more than me etc. on and on she went.</p><p> </p><p>i said he's my husband, my friend your my daugher a special type of love that can never be taken away. she just isn't used to seeing me wtih someone like this. she never saw me married. she was just a little over one when ex and i divorced. yet i thought by now all these years later she'd come to terms with it.</p><p> </p><p>easy child just said thank god you aren't getting divorced, mom you should treat him better. get a load of her!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Jena, post: 418417, member: 4514"] wow you guys are amazing, seriously. i posted this with such guilt and like oh man their going to be like jen no wonder difficult child is off the wall lol. yet unfortunately she's always been like this.... i do set aside time for him and i when he gets home almost each night, yet difficult child tries to ruin it. so we have to fight with-keeping door closed while she bangs away or calls my name. we're in mist of medication change so its' bumpy. kids don't literally disrespect him, easy child loves him. yet difficult child just ignores him totally it's like he doesnt' exist. its' hard for him. he comes home and says hi and she grunts at him. his work schedule is hard, i felt so bad when he said you make these great dinners i hear about yet out of respect you never leave me some, i get i walk in at midnight but dont' i deserve that? point taken, so yup he'll be getting dinner wrapped each night. laundry i do, yet this week i faltered, my legs were bad and i couldnt' make it up and down basement stairs. i think he's more upset about his socks. sounds absurd yet he has feet and ankle problems and so i just bought him these special socks and the kids come into his drawer and take them all the time. we will now lock door. he does need to stand up for me with kids. he literally NEVER does. easy child or difficult child can be going at me and he stays away. def. not a united front. HAOZI great point. other junk too like you guys mentioned he comes home i'm rarely all smiles, i usually vent first after i ask how was your day i go on about easy child or difficult child. never do i just meet him to spend time with him without the junk. that'll change. his blow up, well it wasnt' like an argument.he just toppled over, and what was very wrong was he grabbed his kids and walked out. we were supposed to go to his sister's to see her new baby. and he just walked out with-his kids stating to me i do not want to talk to you. so difficult child fell apart. doesnt' take much and well any kid would be upset. than he kept coming from truck back in house again, he was just so upset and all over the board. difficult child at one point said look what your doing, what's wrong with you your nuts mom should divorce you. he simply said difficult child i'm sorry i'm upset infront of you but you have to wake up to what's going on here and your mom who you think is perfect. ah thats' where he faltered it is alot, and its' hard because he does get home so late. so i'm already tired. yet i chose this life you guys are right. clothes should be clean, dinner saved and i'll start there. yet i also told him no more of this meltdown stuff. it isnt' healthy for kids or either of us. we were like that cop show on tv. domestic situation at such and such address lol. so embarrassing. i mean neighbors were looking because we're close to them and he put kids in truck and kept coming back and forth. also the ex now blocked is causing tension as well. i' m not sure if he's unblocking her, yet it seems like he'll ask me to block then block comes off than i reset again. not sure what's giong on there. he said it isnt' him. i got mad at difficult child at one point, i said listen i get you want me all to yourself she smiled and said yea. i said you got me all day long. he's here two days a week only and midnights. when he comes home other than a hi to him and brief talk if your up you do not disturb us no banging on door screaming mom etc. not allowed. she said well you love him and always forgive him when he loses it. i said listen there are things that he's feeling that you aren't aware of that frustrate him and he wasnt' able to express those before now so it built up. she said well if he wasnt' here you'd lay in bed with-me at night so i could sleep etc. i said no i wouldn't. she said you love him more than me etc. on and on she went. i said he's my husband, my friend your my daugher a special type of love that can never be taken away. she just isn't used to seeing me wtih someone like this. she never saw me married. she was just a little over one when ex and i divorced. yet i thought by now all these years later she'd come to terms with it. easy child just said thank god you aren't getting divorced, mom you should treat him better. get a load of her! [/QUOTE]
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